The Queen was clearly irritated by the noisy Italian Leader Mr Berlusconi yesterday at the G20 summit. Her Majesty posed for photographs with world leaders whilst Berlusconi was singing opera and offering ice cream to passers by.
Berlusconi is kn...
Dastardly Dick Bowker head Vulture at NExpress central announced more bleak news "Despite my efforts to maintain profitability it looks like we are slipping off the rails" Dick axed the on board catering for the East Coast main line recently in an ef...
The debate into banning train nerds from stations in order to peruse their hobbies is hotting up. Supreme train geek Pete Waterman responsible for a string a shite pop songs in the eighties said "This is diabolical, National Express are putting an en...
Jade Goody, half human half Alsatian has made the headlines again for no apparent reason other than the fact she is dying from cancer. In hospitals and care homes across Britain people who have lived fulfilling lives are in the same predicament. With...
Train spotters are to be banned from all major stations along the East Coast route as the result of a clampdown from National Express. A spokeswoman for the Transport Salaried Staff Association said "We know NX are planning this move. The informatio...
Liquid shit - Passengers standing on platforms at Hatfield and Welwyn station are literally getting shat on by Nexpress East Coast. According to recent passenger complaints NXEC trains are spraying liquid shit on passengers as the train enters the st...
Following on from the fiasco to brighten up Bradford centre one council leader tried to calm residents fears by saying: "Look, I know Bradford may be a disease riddled festering sump of putrid matter. Full of obnoxious toe rags you wouldn't pee on if...
The cockerel crows and the ghoul has arisen. It's the last supper for the East Coast Main Line
Crucified
Richard Bowker is a graduate of the Richard Branson school of management but with none of the aptitude. Flitting from job to job and leavin...
Channel 4 will show still images of Prices Diana's last moments on TV tonight despite request from Prince William and Price Harry for them to refrain.
Extremist Jerry Falwell, the controversial homophobic arsehole and evangelical lunatic has died of a heart attack. "Good bloody riddance" said the Reverend Ian Paisley. "He will burn in ever lasting flame for his twist...
Scooch, the British entry into this-years Eurovision Song Contest flew back into Heathrow yesterday evening to scenes of hysteria. People cheered "You're crap!" and "Tossers!"...
Tony Blair pulled off one last insult when he persuaded the Eurovision organisers to move the World Famous Song Contest final from Helsinki to Baghdad.
An almost great showbiz entertainer finally hangs up his dancing shoes today.
President George W. Bush embarrassed the Queen at the White House in front of a packed audience. His speech started well saying: "It's a real pleasure to have The Queen here in America." But rapidly went down hill with, "I was upse...
The wife of the jailed terror rapper Mrs Jalalala Wowo has been arrested for raising funds with menaces. Police arrested her on Monday evening she was questioned at London's Paddington Green police station.
Peter Andre the sickly faced playmate of inflatable model Jordan has been discharged from hospital.
As the race for the French presidential election heats up our foreign policy reporter Danny Buckle investigates.
The Conservative leader David Cameron lead calls for a public inquiry into the hip hop rappers investigation, following on from yesterday's outrage at terror rappe...