WASHINGTON - Like many ex-athletes, Rep. Norm Dicks started packing on weight when he left the gridiron. The former University of Washington linebacker struggled for years with diet after diet, and each time the blubber came bouncing back.
WASHINGTON - President Bush made a strange confession to a pool of reporters in the Oval Office yesterday during a photo session with Iraqi Prime Minister Nouri al-Maliki,.
LONDON - The Queen Mother has returned to life, taking the form of a small, hybrid motorcar, Prince Charles revealed today.
LONDON - Prince Charles underwent a dramatic mental and physical transformation during a month at a sanatorium in Arles, France, Buckingham Palace announced today.
JUAN DE BUTTOFUOCCO, WA -- British Prime Minister Tony Blair arrived on the Makaw Indian reservation today and claimed five percent of the proceeds from the lucrative "Good Times Roll" casino.
WASHINGTON - The vast hand that plucked the Moon from the night sky Sunday belonged to a cosmic softball pitcher, Defense Secretary Robert Gates said today.
WASHINGTON, Jan. 6, Reuters -- A 94-year-old folk artist tied Saddam Hussein's execution noose using the rigging of an historic warship, then risked her life to save the rope from a lynch mob, the White House said today.
LONDON -- Actor Richard Gere declared in a letter published in today's London Times that he had spied the first gerbil of spring while standing in his hotel room overlooking Hyde Park.
COLUMBIA, S.C. - Sven Oafsen is no ordinary Norwegian.
TEL AVIV -- Israeli panormalist Uri Geller revealed yesterday that, without his knowledge, his own penis had been promoting itself and disparaging its owner in satires posted on the Internet.
"I learned the hard way that my penis had a head of its...
BODMIN, ENGLAND -- A freelance satirist obsessed with mentalist Uri Geller's penis has disappeared from St. Ives Hospital with a laptop computer, medical implements to perform circumcisions, a set of tattooing irons, and a straight razor, police...
BAGHDAD - The Defense Department has recruited hundreds of American carnival "geeks" to instill courage in the fledgling Iraqi Army, according to U.S. military sources.
LONDON - Freelance humorist "Breeze" is in rehab for obsessive-compulsive disorder after writing dozens of satirical articles featuring "Uri Geller's penis."...
NEW YORK, December 28, Reuters - Renegade Miss USA Tara Conner announced today that she has donated organs to a child in exchange for yet another chance to retain her crown.
WASHINGTON, Reuters - The United States has come up with a war-winning strategy in Iraq that goes by the name "100 Percent Solution," according to White House and Pentagon sources.
LOS ANGELES -- Actor Richard Gere revealed in a letter published in today's Los Angeles Times that his pet finch, Atticus, had betrayed him and is "dead to me."...
NOME, AK, June 25, 2013, Reuters - Hopes faded for toy baron Nicholas Klaus and his legendary sheltered workshop yesterday after a U.S. Navy rescue team found the remains of his eight tiny reindeer on an ice floe 700 miles northeast of Point Barrow,...
JUAN DE BUTTOFUCCO, WA - Celebrity socialite Naked Paris Hilton opened ESPN's first season of live, televised seal clubbing today, taking a sea lion pup by the flipper and dragging it onto the dance floor of "Thunder Clap," the most &qu...
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Philadelphia Eagles Only Need 2-Passenger Corvette For Official White House Visit After Winning Super Bowl Team
Super Bowl Winners Eagles Do Victory Tour
Eric, Donald Trump, Jr. and Jarrad Kushner Offered Big Hollywood Movie Roles
Eric and Donald Trump Jr. Are Kidnapped and Returned by the Russians
Vice-President Pence Reveals He Has a Fear of Orientals
Scientists Seek Artificial Filter for Trump's Thoughts
Trump is Banned From Attending Olympics
Trump Calls the Stock Market Drop "Fake News" and Blames Obama and Crooked Hillary
Rep Schiff Exposed as Hillary Black Ops Bot
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