In preparation for Sarah Palin's upcoming speaking engagement at the first National Tea Baggers Convention, organizers and sponsors have announced that the former half-term governor and beauty pageant runner up will be addressing the crowd from atop...
Washington D.C. -- In response to his rapidly plummeting poll numbers and the recent revelations that the word most likely to be associated with his presidency is "incompetent," President Bush lashed out at members of the assembled press co...
PLUNKER, WV- Local area farm hand Cletus Rimmer, has applied to the courts for a restraining order against his neighbor's sheep 'Snowflake'. Rimmer claims he fears for his personal safety and no longer feels secure walking home from the l...
Washington, DC - During a recent press conference, when asked about the growing movement to impeach him, the President surprised the gathered members of the press corps by smiling and saying, "I say, sweet! Bring it on! Bring it on hard and heav...
Washington, DC-- The nation is anxiously awaiting the results of President Bush's recently revealed, surgery.
Vatican City, Rome -- Precipitated by the recent passing of Pope John Paul II, the Catholic church is currently in the process of re-evaluating its role in the modern world. While the College of Cardinals are presently in seclusion choosing a new Pop...
Los Angeles, CA - Much to the chagrin of no talent posers and US advertising and recording industry executives, it appears that the music buying public has finally wised up and is no longer interested in purchasing any merchandise that has anything t...
VATICAN CITY, ROME - The entire garment and fashion district of Vatican City is currently in an uproar due to the recent untimely passing of the official papal milliner, blind Brother Bonito Bonnetto. The unfortunate Brother Bonnetto prematurely...
WASHINGTON, DC - Washington area Catholics are gearing up for one of the most important religious events of the new century. Due to the extreme difficulty in finding any verifiable virgins over the age of 11 in the nation's capital, His Holin...
LYNCHBURG, VA - Prominent Southern Baptist minister, bon vivant and evangelical wunderkind, Jerry Falwell, recently appeared on Fox News recommending that Great Britain should be included on President Bush's "Axis of Evil" list. He...
NEW HAVEN, CT - The walls of Yale's Sheffield - Sterling - Strathcona Hall were resplendent with garlands of red, white and blue taffeta last evening as President G.W. Bush was on hand to be inducted into the Yale cheerleader's hall of fame.
WASHINGTON, DC-- In an attempt to guarantee equal opportunities for each and every one of its citizens, regardless of age, race, socioeconomic status, intelligence, attractiveness or ability, the Bush administration is about to release the details of...
CRAWFORD, TX -- Part-time, under-employed village idiot, Fester McWilly, recently applied to the Texas secretary of education for funds to help him upgrade his job skills. Mr. McWilly a card carrying member of the International Brotherhood of Dolts,...
MODESTO, CA -- No sooner had the heavenly white smoke cleared the soot encrusted orifice high atop the Sistine Chapel, than the new pope, His Holiness Benedict XVI found himself forced to quell fantastic rumors emanating from the Michael Jackson...
BOSTON HAROLD -- Denizens of a cheerful alcoholic den of iniquity located in a quaint brownstone neighborhood in downtown Boston, can be found scratching their heads in puzzled wonder at the recent appointment of one of their own as the new pope...
WASHINGTON, DC -- White House physicians are breathing a collective sigh of relief this week as President Bush appears to be on the mend from the injuries he sustained while recently touring with former Attorney General John Ashcroft and his Christia...
PIXY TWADDLE GAZETTE -- Long time staunch proponent of virgin births, talking shrubbery and literate livestock, Richard Noggin, part time sessional lecturer at Confused Christian Scientists for Stasis Community College and senior pastor for the congr...
Dear Uncle BoB,
How can I get my girlfriend of five years to quit being so cruel? I'm afraid to sleep with her anymore. Every time I do, wh...