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Charles Manson wannabes express concern over there being no good music anymore

LOS ANGELES, U.S. - At the annual meeting of psychopaths who think that songs are telling them to murder people concern was expressed over the lack of good music anymore. "It's a big problem" Charles Manson wannabe Jeff Smith explained. "Back in t...

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EU Court to outlaw Bono

Funny story: EU Court to outlaw Bono

BRUSSELS - In the aftermath of the European Commission's decision to reprimand Apple over their tax avoidance they have now turned their attention to rock star, humanitarian and professional pranet Bono. Controversially, in 2006, U2 opted to move the...

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Jeremy Corbyn forced to sit on the floor due to lack of seats in the House of Commons

Funny story: Jeremy Corbyn forced to sit on the floor due to lack of seats in the House of Commons

WESTMINSTER, LONDON - Current leader of the Labour Party, Jeremy Corbyn, was forced to sit on the floor of the House of Commons due to a lack of seats it emerged this week. Posting a video of himself seated on the floor he said that the House was...

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Hell to be renamed Hell-upon-Thames

HELL-UPON-THAMES - Following in the footsteps of Staines, which recently re-named itself Staines-upon-Thames, Satan has declared that he will re-name Hell Hell-upon-Thames, as part of a £60 million publicity campaign to increase tourism to the region...

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Local charity hero comes to aid of Nigerian prince

Funny story: Local charity hero comes to aid of Nigerian prince

WORCESTER - A local teenager is being celebrated as a charity hero after he came to the financial aid of a Nigerian prince. Thomas McArthur, 14, of Saint Dunstan's Crescent, received an email from the prince Tuesday night from the unsuspicious em...

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Gary Glitter accused of "possessing Gary Glitter records"

Shamed entertainer and glam rock star Gary Glitter faces new charges at London's Old Bailey today accused of possessing Gary Glitter records and conspiracy to record a new album. Mr. Glitter, which I suspect may be a stage name, is understood to...

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Jihadi John "would have gotten away with it if it weren't for you meddling kids"

RAQQA, SYRIA - "Who'd have thought?" Jihadi John muttered to himself "that it'd end up like this." In the end it hadn't been a drone that had brought the man known only as Jihadi John, from West London but joined the so-called Islamic State in 2012,...

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"This song is gay" concludes celebrated music critic

Funny story: "This song is gay" concludes celebrated music critic

A celebrated music critic has delivered a scathing verdict on the new album by Catfish and the Bottlemen today, taking the band and the internet by storm. After listening to the first 30 seconds of the song and proceeding to take approximately 0.

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Legendary "good guy with a gun" yet to be discovered

Funny story: Legendary "good guy with a gun" yet to be discovered

Despite many years of searching and the six hundredth mass shooting in the U.S. this week alone the legendary figure of the "good guy with a gun" is yet to make an appearance. One of the most enduring characters in American folklore, alongside th...

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Britain becomes third world country due to lack of third runway at Heathrow

Funny story: Britain becomes third world country due to lack of third runway at Heathrow

LONDON, ENGLAND - The damning economic report issued today revealed the lowest GDP growth figures in British history, effectively rendering Britain a third world country. Economists, politicians and self-proclaimed "experts" from down the pub wer...

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Saudi Arabia to join Top Gear

Funny story: Saudi Arabia to join Top Gear

RIYADH, KINGDOM OF SAUDI ARABIA - Saudi Arabia, the oil rich Gulf state, has continued its attempt to shake its bad reputation as a regressive, brutal dictatorship by joining the British motoring show Top Gear, replacing host Chris Evans, who left th...

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All crime ceases as Trump becomes president

Funny story: All crime ceases as Trump becomes president

*DISCLAIMER* All names of people and organisations contained herein, barring Mr Trump, are works of fiction and any resemblance to any real figure is purely coincidental WASHINGTON, D.C., January 21st, 2017 - BREAKING: Since President Donald Trump...

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Northern Line at rush hour revealed as Dante's tenth circle of hell

Funny story: Northern Line at rush hour revealed as Dante's tenth circle of hell

In a shock statement, the tenth circle of hell from Dante's "Inferno" has been named as the Northern Line at rush hour. Intended as the circle to punish commuters for trusting the British public transportation system, this horrendous site sees an...

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God to step down, names Alexis Taylor of Hot Chip as successor

Funny story: God to step down, names Alexis Taylor of Hot Chip as successor

HEAVEN - God announced today in a press statement that he aimed to step down from the role of God. He clarified that: "it's difficult being God, people don't really get that there's a lot to it, you know, unleashing fiery vengeance upon whores an...

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Breaking news…

Wallis Simpson And Meghan Markle

Somewhere in heaven, Wallis Simpson is smiling and applauding Meghan Markle’s wedding to Prince Harry: an American, an actress and a divorcee. Wow! Everything else is just sparkle. Smart guy, Harry.
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