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Secrets of the Taliban Shopping Lists

Funny story: Secrets of the Taliban Shopping Lists

The BBC has revealed what's hot on the typical Taliban shopping list. Aside from the usual fare of whores and heroin, 'Head and Shoulders' shampoo is a favourite because it sounds like somebody has already been beheaded, yet it also gets rid of dandr...

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Barclays to Cut Ten Trillion Jobs

Funny story: Barclays to Cut Ten Trillion Jobs

As of next year, the Barclays Eagle will be flying lower than Buddy Holly. Sources close to the Board (two mixed-gender prostitutes and a man who peddles blood diamonds from the back of a three-wheeler bike) revealed: "First to go will be the back...

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Mass Emigration to Uruguay

Funny story: Mass Emigration to Uruguay

Apparently there's hardly anybody left in crap places like Middlesbrough. We asked the Treasury department: 'Has this anything to do with the recent decision that Uruguay will provide several tonnes of dirt -cheap, legalised weed, allocating 1.5...

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UK Military to make soldiers out of UKIP leader's Skin

Funny story: UK Military to make soldiers out of UKIP leader's Skin

"It's so tough" asserted Major Jonathan Eaton Cum, "It's probably true that he's made of Teflon". Nigel Farage certainly gets away with much, without being shot. Army boffins agree: "We put him in front of a firing squad on Thursday and asked h...

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UKIP in politically correct tweet shocker

Funny story: UKIP in politically correct tweet shocker

A senior UKIP MP has tweeted politically sensitive comments. "This is a disadvantage on the run up to the European elections" said leader Nigel Farage. Bernie Shaveless, UKIP representative for ASBO upon Thamesmead, suggested on Twitter that:...

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Breaking news…

Putin Has Stopped Taking Trump's Calls

Even soul-less, sociopathic dictators have their limits.
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