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Funny story: Camilla To Play "Dawn" In New 'Dawn, Of The Planet Of The Ape-Women'

Camilla To Play "Dawn" In New 'Dawn, Of The Planet Of The Ape-Women'

Camilla Parker, Duchess of Cornish is to play the title role in Prince Edward's debut movie, "Dawn, of The Planet of The Ape Women", playing a female ape-humanoid creature instead of incumbent Helen-Bonnington-Carter. Prince Edward, who always th...
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Funny story: New National Sperm Bank "ATM" Machine Proposal

New National Sperm Bank "ATM" Machine Proposal

The new National Sperm Bank in Birmingham is to have "night deposit boxes" and sperm withdrawal A.T.M machines like any other bank, a spokesperson for the N.S.B told our sperm welfare staff this morning. Nasty letters will be sent out to customer...
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Funny story: Blue Peter To Catapult Food Parcels To Space Station

Blue Peter To Catapult Food Parcels To Space Station

Barni, Rustle and Radsy, Blue Petre presenters have today made a catapult out of Cornflake boxes to supply the astronauts on the International Space Station with food. The supply rocket exploded leaving the crew without food and although Russian f...
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Funny story: Cornwall Is "Axis Of Evil" State - Regime Change On Cards - Obama

Cornwall Is "Axis Of Evil" State - Regime Change On Cards - Obama

President Obama has expressed grave concern that Cornwall has been taken over by the militant Prince Charles, member of the British Royal Family and the Prince of Wales. Charles has been reported to the President by the C.I.A. as having undemocra...
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Funny story: Don't Flatten Hedgehogs Pleads David Dimpleby

Don't Flatten Hedgehogs Pleads David Dimpleby

Sir David Dimpleby, the famous naturist has appealed to drivers to take care when round shaped spikey animals cross the road and to try to avoid driving over them. According to a survey among drivers, most people think that hedgehogs are flat animals...
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Funny story: Secret Room Found In British Government Building By Decorators

Secret Room Found In British Government Building By Decorators

A false bookcase in the British parliament buildings, the Houses of Parliament slid aside to reveal a panelled secret corridor yesterday. To the astonishment of decorators removing books, a well lit passage appeared, leading from the back of the V.I.
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Funny story: Keep Your Hands Off Our Beavers - Devon Association Tells Government

Keep Your Hands Off Our Beavers - Devon Association Tells Government

A pressure group has begun action to prevent the government from getting hold of their beavers in Devon. Friends of the Planet told our beaver welfare team that because beavers are wilder than normal in Scotland, it follows that any home grown Englis...
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Funny story: Putin Says Air Crash Snow Plough Was Cleared For Take Off

Putin Says Air Crash Snow Plough Was Cleared For Take Off

Another tragic accident was narrowly avoided yesterday when a new vodka fuelled snow plough driver took off in his flying snow plough in front of a plane carrying Ukranian VIPs. It turned out that the snow plough, flown by an ex-alcoholic ex-pilot, h...
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Funny story: Ban On Bank Holiday Sofa TV Ads

Ban On Bank Holiday Sofa TV Ads

Opposition parties have reputedly held meetings with media watchdogs with a view to banning pointless Bank Holiday sofa advertisements on television. T.V. audiences have long been confused by the bombardment of channels with advertisements for sofas...
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Funny story: Shop A Celebrity Campaign Offers £10,000 As T.V. Trials Dry Up

Shop A Celebrity Campaign Offers £10,000 As T.V. Trials Dry Up

Major media companies have offered huge inducements to fill the gap left by trial reporting on T.V. as next week sees the end of yet another celebrity ordeal. Rumours of rewards such as £10,000 in Woolworths vouchers and free video hires for a year f...
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Funny story: Government Approves Adding Chemicals to Scottish Water Supplies

Government Approves Adding Chemicals to Scottish Water Supplies

The systematic addition of chemicals to Scottish water supplies is to resume to keep rebellion levels down. Additional chemical dosing will continue in keeping with pre-referendum Westminster policy, effectively maintaining a docile disposition in th...
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Funny story: Official - Wanking Not A Cause Of Blindness!

Official - Wanking Not A Cause Of Blindness!

A Medical Journal has published sensational clinical trial results proving that continuous wanking is not a cause of blindness. The results, published in "Better Lancit" contradicted what was commonly believed to be the truth. In the controlled e...
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Funny story: Kim Jong-un and Mark Lowton Return After Being Apparently Missing

Kim Jong-un and Mark Lowton Return After Being Apparently Missing

Kim Jong un and Spoof Editor Mark Lowton have "re-appeared" at the same time, fuelling rumours of a behind the scenes agreement having been thrashed out regarding story approvals about the North Korean Dictator (not a reference to Mark who isn't Nort...
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Funny story: Astronaut Badly Burned In Bizarre Porridge Accident

Astronaut Badly Burned In Bizarre Porridge Accident

Astronaut Nigel Armstrong was this morning recovering at the serious burns unit in Norwich South Infirmary. After a malfunction caused Armstrong, dubbed "The Man In The Moon", to come down too soon, he inexplicably asked several bystanders the way to...
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Funny story: University's New Princess B.A. Attracts Thousands Of Phone Inquiries

University's New Princess B.A. Attracts Thousands Of Phone Inquiries

Mothers with small girls throughout Britain have been besieging colleges such as Oxford with inquiries about degrees and doctorates in Princessology. The new course has been offered to cater for tens of thousands of keen children obsessed with dr...
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Funny story: Cat Bites Hamster's Head Off In Whiskas Orgy

Cat Bites Hamster's Head Off In Whiskas Orgy

Peers Morgan, the ex 1960s D.J. famous for hosting "Ready Steady Rock" was yesterday said to be furious at television news helicopters which have been circling his council house for three weeks. This morning police helicopters began an intensive...
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Funny story: Out Of Control Leprosy Epidemic Sweeps Through Goole

Out Of Control Leprosy Epidemic Sweeps Through Goole

Pressure on the Oxford English Dictionary Editors and Wikipedia to describe "epidemic" as an isolated single case is mounting. Tabloids and online news agencies have long been complaining that the E word increases newspaper sales and Web hits and...
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Funny story: Husband Turns Central Heating Up in October

Husband Turns Central Heating Up in October

A terrified housewife called 999 after her husband turned the central heating up to 28 degrees. Demanding to have him sectioned under the Mental Health Act, Mrs. Beryl Coldwell of Scunthorpe who was found hiding in the attic wrapped in a blanket, bra...
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Showing page 1 (of 22 pages)
Breaking News...

Obama Calls Secret Service On Sheet-Clad Trick-or-Treaters

Obama, not aware of its being Halloween, called the Secret Service on some sheet-clad ghost trick-or-treaters. "I was afraid they were going to burn a cross on the lawn," spoke a terrorized Obama.
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