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Funny story: Jehovah's Witless Faithful Boycott Three-in-One Lubricants

Jehovah's Witless Faithful Boycott Three-in-One Lubricants

Claiming that the doctrine of the trinity, or "three-in-one" was clearly a lie concocted by Satan to lead true believers away from God's holy word, the leadership of the Jehovah's Witless Church announced a boycott of all Three-in-One lubricating pro...
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Funny story: ISIS' Guns Fall Silent Following Coalition Air Strikes

ISIS' Guns Fall Silent Following Coalition Air Strikes

Battle lines in northern Iraq and Syria have fallen strangely silent in the past few days following the latest air strikes by coalition aircraft. In a press conference this morning in Washington, the Joint-Rolling Chiefs of Stash explained the rea...
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Funny story: Bugger Queen to Slide Meat Between Tim Horny's Buns

Bugger Queen to Slide Meat Between Tim Horny's Buns

U.S. fast food chain Bugger Queen, aided by a load of seed money from financier Warren Bummit, announced plans to penetrate the Canadian market by buying up coffee and dog nut chain Tim Horny's. "We're really pumped up over this", announced Bugger...
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Funny story: Hotel Heiress to Wed Motel Heir

Hotel Heiress to Wed Motel Heir

Paris "The Heiress" Hilton, in her typical understated fashion, called a press conference this morning to announce her upcoming marriage to Norman "Psycho" Bates. "We have so much in common," she gushed, "what with my family's ties to the hotel bi...
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Funny story: Russian Jetliner Accidentally Shot Down by Louisiana Duck Hunters

Russian Jetliner Accidentally Shot Down by Louisiana Duck Hunters

An Aeroflot Airbus A330 was accidentally shot down on its approach to New Orleans by an as yet unidentified member of a duck hunting party led by Phil Robinson of "Duck Republic" fame. Said Robinson, also famous for inventing the "Duck Dictator" d...
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Funny story: Gene Simmonds to Buy Gaza Strip

Gene Simmonds to Buy Gaza Strip

Stinking rich hyper-mega-rock-star Gene Simmonds, who made his trillions leading the heavy-metal band CHISZ, announced his plan to bring peace to the Middle East today. "I've just inked a deal to buy the Gaza strip, and am negotiating an offer on...
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Funny story: Prostitutes Run Clear out of Midwestern Town

Prostitutes Run Clear out of Midwestern Town

A Montana town has taken a novel approach to curbing street prostitution, with great success. At a press conference yesterday, Lambton mayor Ramsey Mouton explained: "We used to be a quiet farming town. The biggest factory here was the woollen m...
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Funny story: Paylin Taunts Poutine

Paylin Taunts Poutine

Having heard from intelligence sources (at any rate, more intelligent than herself or her supporters) that Russian troops were massing in eastern Siberia, former vice-presidential running MILF Sierra Paylin called a press conference at the western ti...
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Funny story: Russia Moves to Annex Alaska

Russia Moves to Annex Alaska

Pwetty-Boy Pwethident Poutine announced last night that Russia had recently undertaken plans to reassert its historical claim to the territory of Alaska. Standing outside a theater in Moscow where the Bolshevik Ballet was rehearsing for a gala pre...
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Funny story: French-Canadian Olympians Crave "Poutine"

French-Canadian Olympians Crave "Poutine"

SOCHI, RUSSIA Canadian athletes--primarily the francophones-- have been spotted wandering the streets of Sochi, phrasebooks and smartphones in hand, asking bewildered restaurateurs, shopkeepers, and ordinary citizens: "Where can we go to eat some po...
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Funny story: Smiley Virus to Perform at Stupor Bowl "Ralf-Time" Show

Smiley Virus to Perform at Stupor Bowl "Ralf-Time" Show

It has been confirmed that Smiley Virus, along with her band, The Hammerlickers, will be performing their smash hit, "Ball Wrecker" at the Stupor Bowl half-time show. Stupor Bowl spokeschick Melody Booker announced the show line-up this morning.
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Funny story: Justus Beaver to Rock New "Bad Boy" Image

Justus Beaver to Rock New "Bad Boy" Image

In the wake of teenage clit-throb Justus Beaver's arrest under section 119a of Florida's Motor Vehicle Act, specifically, "...care and control of a motor vehicle while under narcissistic delusions of grandeur and self-importance...", his agent, Mony...
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Funny story: Man Hospitalized Following Three-Hour Orgasm

Man Hospitalized Following Three-Hour Orgasm

Local couple Dick and Kittie Cummings found themselves in a sticky situation early Saturday after a morning quickie went horribly wrong. "I reckoned he'd be kind of horny after two weeks at sea, but I wasn't expecting this", said a visibly bloated...
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Funny story: Study: Twerking Frequently Inspires Jerking

Study: Twerking Frequently Inspires Jerking

Coxville, IN - A seminal paper published by a trio of post-doctoral researchers at the Johnson Institute points to a strong correlation between twerking and jerking. Behavioral psychologists Peter Smallwood, Rod Wang, and Jack Hiscock agreed to me...
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Funny story: Hammet, Morrissey Split Amicably

Hammet, Morrissey Split Amicably

CAIRO, ILLINOIS Local residents Moses Hammet and Chastity Virginia Morrissey finalized their divorce proceedings on Thursday of this past week. Astute Spoof News reporter Vlad D.M. Paylaw was able to interview the estranged couple in a Pierogie Pal...
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Funny story: Funding Request Rocks da House, YO!

Funding Request Rocks da House, YO!

Some ten weeks ago, Dr. Astro Blasta (Ph.D., C2H5OH) proposed that NASA build a giant spaceship to send all of our planet's telemarketers to a distant world whose inhabitants might actually welcome them. President Barragh O'Bama encouraged Dr. B...
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Funny story: Royal Clone Due Shortly

Royal Clone Due Shortly

LONDON A spokesman for the royal family announced today that a clone of the newborn prince would be born to a surrogate mother within a few weeks. The delay, he said, was necessary because it was only possible to draw a DNA sample from Kate's amnio...
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Funny story: "Moe" Hammet-Morrissey Outed in Coupe

"Moe" Hammet-Morrissey Outed in Coupe

CAIRO, ILLINOIS Local resident Moses ("Moe") Hammet-Morrissey was outed in a coupe on Saturday night when private detective Trixie Scopes photographed him leaving the parking lot of a local gay bar in his Hyundai Elantra, with a much younger man in...
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Breaking News...

Obama... Ordinary like us.

Yesterday, President Obama was refused entry into a restaurant for not wearing a tie and later fined for double parking and... ordered to return his library books... and thrown off a tram...and...

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