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Funny story:  Facebook to Replace Intercessory Prayer with "Likes"

Facebook to Replace Intercessory Prayer with "Likes"

MENLO PARK, CA--God, deluged with intercessory prayers since the dawn of social media, has outsourced prayer to Facebook to give Him more time to devote to His new hobby, scrapbooking. Explained St. Peter, at a press conference held at Facebook's...
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Funny story:  Many of "The Most Gullible Generation" Dying Off

Many of "The Most Gullible Generation" Dying Off

MUDCAT, TN--Gabby Mae Fester, a longtime FOX News viewer and a member of what media analyst Howard Kurtz calls "The Most Gullible Generation," died today in her home in Mudcat, TN. She was 105. Miss Fester was apparently sitting in her home watc...
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Funny story:  The Universe to Start Charging User Fees for Favors Granted

The Universe to Start Charging User Fees for Favors Granted

EVERYWHERE--In a blow to New Age enthusiasts worldwide, a spokesperson for the universe announced today that Mr. Universe would begin, in April, charging user fees whenever someone asks for a favor and is granted one. Said a spokesperson for the u...
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Funny story:  Two Shot at Fifth Year Birthday Celebration for the Tea Party

Two Shot at Fifth Year Birthday Celebration for the Tea Party

WASHINGTON, DC--This week at the Hyatt Regency the Tea Party Patriots of America celebrated their fifth year anniversary, an event which ended in tragedy as two of its members were shot dead after a dispute over the birthday cake designed for the cel...
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Funny story:  Drones to Be Equipped with Gaydar in Arizona

Drones to Be Equipped with Gaydar in Arizona

SOMEWHERE FAR FROM THE RAINBOW--In light of the passage of what opponents are calling "Jesus Crow Laws," which allow businesses to discriminate against gays as an expression both of their religious liberty and their love of Jesus, state lawmakers in...
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Funny story:  White Male Shot Three Times for Playing Country Music Too Loud

White Male Shot Three Times for Playing Country Music Too Loud

NATCHEZ, MS-A white middle-aged man was shot three times at a Natchez Piggly Wiggly after another customer in the parking lot asked the man to turn down his radio, which was tuned to a Natchez country music channel. The man who shot him, an African...
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Funny story:  NRA Calls for SOS (Shoot on Suspicion) Laws Nationwide

NRA Calls for SOS (Shoot on Suspicion) Laws Nationwide

FAIRFAX, VA--In a legal move to avoid having to prove that an armed person felt physically threatened when discharging his weapon, Wayne LaPierre, CEO and Bullshitter-in-Chief for the National Rifle Association, is now calling for SOS, or Shoot on Su...
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Funny story:  Bob Schieffer Interviews Ted Cruz's Ass

Bob Schieffer Interviews Ted Cruz's Ass

Bob Schieffer, on Face the Nation, interviewed Texas Senator Ted Cruz's ass on Sunday. When asked about the government shutdown last fall, Cruz's ass said: "Throughout the government shutdown, I opposed a government shutdown. I said we shouldn't s...
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Funny story:  Breaking News from NPR:  Pope John Paul II's Underwear Stolen from Reliquary

Breaking News from NPR: Pope John Paul II's Underwear Stolen from Reliquary

One of only three known pairs of underwear stained with what's said to be Pope John Paul II's dried urine was stolen over the weekend from a small church in the mountains of Italy's central Abruzzo region. According to the BBC, the thief or thieve...
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Funny story:  Ohio to Try New Method of Execution:  Strangulation

Ohio to Try New Method of Execution: Strangulation

LUCASVILLE, OH-After trying a new drug combo to execute convicted killer Dennis McGuire, who choked and snorted in paroxysms of pain for twenty-five minutes before finally dying, the state of Ohio has announced a new method of killing people on death...
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Funny story:  GOP:  "Stop Feeding Poor Kids Lunch and We'll Extend Benefits for the Long-term Unemployed"

GOP: "Stop Feeding Poor Kids Lunch and We'll Extend Benefits for the Long-term Unemployed"

WASHINGTON, DC--Rep. Al Newtrition, of the Tea Party Caucus in Congress, today announced that the House would be willing to extend unemployment benefits to the long-term unemployed only if the federal government would stop wasting money feeding poor...
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Funny story:  God Admits:  "Pope Francis is right.  The jig's up.  There is no hell."

God Admits: "Pope Francis is right. The jig's up. There is no hell."

HEAVEN--In an interview God held with CNN's Anderson Cooper on Sunday, He admitted that Pope Francis was right when he said, "The church no longer believes in a literal hell where people suffer. This doctrine is incompatible with the infinite love of...
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Funny story:  Al-Qaeda Apologizes for Deadly Attack on Hospital

Al-Qaeda Apologizes for Deadly Attack on Hospital

SANAA, YEMEN--A spokesman for al-Qaeda today apologized for a deadly attack on a hospital in Yemen that left dozens of the patients dead or injured. Said the spokesman, who remained anonymous, "We are so sorry for killing those innocent patients,...
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Funny story:  Cincinnati Teen Run Over Twice While Texting Her Friend

Cincinnati Teen Run Over Twice While Texting Her Friend

CINCINNAT, OH--A Cincinnati teenager, Brittany Simpson, was run over twice on Thursday while texting her friend as she crossed 4th and Walnut St. While Brittany was crossing the street, absorbed in her Smart Phone, a Ford Focus ran over the sixtee...
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Funny story:  FOX News Outraged That Obamacare Doesn't Cover an Erection That Lasts Over Four Hours

FOX News Outraged That Obamacare Doesn't Cover an Erection That Lasts Over Four Hours

We've all heard the line in commercials for erectile dysfunction: "If you have an erection lasting over four hours, call your physician." But according to Bill O'Rection, of FOX News, don't bother to call Obamacare, which, according to the aging pu...
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Funny story:  FOX News, the Christian Coalition Declare a December Offensive in the War Against Christmas

FOX News, the Christian Coalition Declare a December Offensive in the War Against Christmas

Bret Baier today grimly announced on FOX News that his network, aligned with the Christian Coalition, will launch a winter offensive in the third week of December in the ongoing War Against Christmas. Said Lt. General "Shep" Smith, who was being i...
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Funny story:  Sarah Palin Eaten by Pro-choice Mama Grizzly While Hunting Caribou

Sarah Palin Eaten by Pro-choice Mama Grizzly While Hunting Caribou

SOMEWHERE IN ALASKA-Sarah Palin, the one-time ex-governor of Alaska and John McCain's running mate in his 2008 presidential bid, was eaten by a grizzly bear Wednesday while hunting caribou with her hunting buddy Ted Cruz. Palin, who was about...
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Funny story:  Personhood USA Wants to Charge Mother Nature with Crimes Against Humanity

Personhood USA Wants to Charge Mother Nature with Crimes Against Humanity

ARVADA, CO-Personhood USA, the lobbying group that believes the rights of a five-day old blastocyst trump those of the mother carrying it, is calling for charging Mother Nature with crimes against humanity for the spontaneous abortions of millions of...
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Showing page 1 (of 4 pages)
Breaking News...

National Institute of Abhorrent Behavior (NIAB) to Study Cable News Anchors

Boston-Dr. Felix Noodlesorter of NAIB received a LooneyToonery grant to study the behavioral traits of those who anchor cable news shows. Prime subject for scrutiny is Wacky Chris Matthews of MSNBC,

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