The DUI Gazette - Instead of sitting politely and waiting for the police officer to reach her automobile, (after being stopped by the officer's flashing lights and sirens for driving on the wrong side of the street) Reese Witherspoon leaned out of th...
It has been hinted that former New York Congressman Anthony Weiner is sort of, kind of, we'll see, maybe going to run for Mayor of New York. His mea-culpa, sad faced photo with wife Huma Abedin on the cover of the New York Times Magazine, appeared to...
Besides having drones, the White House and Air Force One, President Zero Dark Fifty/Fifty has spy satellites and the technology to presently zap all guns owned by private U.S. citizens, disable those guns, turning the barrels into a corkscrew and red...
The White House announced that the Department of Motor Vehicles, (DMV) will be abolished as soon as they empty the buildings. Judging from its history, (stagnant lines that move at a snail's pace) the lights at the DMV may remain on until the end of...
There have been many confident announcements by physicists about the latest success of the Hadron Collider, (not to be confused with a fender bender). The Collider is located in a 17 mile ring beneath Switzerland, (land of chocolate and fondue) and F...
Bill Gates is funding a new condom design to be better and more comfortable than the old design. While enormously successful with previous ventures: computers and philanthropy, condom design may prove to be a greater challenge, sort of like: Can anyo...
Following the State of the Union speech by President Barack Obama, the Republican rebuttal was presented by Senator Marco Rubio, or as Time Magazine headlined on their cover story: The Savior Of The Republican Party. Instead of turning in a savior ty...
Hold onto you hats, England. Whose pants are on fire: Groucho, Romney, or Forrest Gump by writing: "England is just a small island. Its roads and houses are small. With few exceptions, it doesn't make things that people in the rest of the world want...
Why is Secretary of State, Hillary Clinton, dodging questions about the 9/11 attacks in Benghazi? First she claimed to have picked up some sort of vague virus during her 24/7 international travels for the last four years and was supposed to be resti...
Mexico and Canada have announced plans to invade the U.S. in search of weapons of mass destruction, or as the U.S. called them when President Bush invaded Iraq: WMD. Canada and Mexico will begin the invasion on the same day moving in a pincer fashion...
Now that President Obama has been re-elected, earning four more rent-free years in the White House, and having won a wrestling match with Majority House Speaker Boehner, reducing the fiscal cliff to a pothole, the president is focused on his future.
James Bond and new film, Skyfall, lands in theaters just in time to save political strategist Karl Rove from the clutches of campaign donors who contributed over $400 million to Rove's American Crossroads super PAC, and got nothing, zero, zip in retu...
Like the Taliban promise of 72 virgins to suicide bombers, former Massachusetts Governor Willard Mitt Romney emphatically denied that he promised male voters 72 virgins if they would vote for his ticket. He also denied that he added a caveat to the p...
Like the Grinch, seems Willard "Mitt" Romney will have some fast explaining to do to Santa Claus for stealing Christmas and sending Sensata Technologies from Freeport, Illinois, to a slave labor factory in China. Thanks to a recent Bain Capital pur...
Hearing the news that MSNBC's Chris Mathews and Current-TV's Elliot Spitzer would moderate the next two presidential debates, Mitt Romney keeled over in faint. Revived with a dose of smelling salts, he announced that he just had a bad dream.
Rinse...
While most people use sun block, umbrellas or a cover-up when going out into the noonday sun, the Duchess of Cambridge decided to go topless and allow the sun rays to give her an even tan.
Good morning sunshine!
Forget the fact that there are t...
The media is proclaiming it a victory for the Republican Party and Romney. Who would have guessed that the same rich guy's son, who protested in favor of the Vietnam draft, but skipped off to Paris, France, when his number came up, (lingering there f...
The mystery guest for the final night of the Democratic convention in Charlottesville, North Carolina, was actor Danny De Vito. Mr. De Vito walked on stage carrying a six-foot tall floor lamp, stood it next to the podium and switched it on. One of th...