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ESPN's Stephen A. Smith to debate all Twitter followers

Funny story: ESPN's Stephen A. Smith to debate all Twitter followers

Citing his passion for debate, flare for commentary and overarching desire to make others feel mentally dominated, ESPN sports anchor Stephen A. Smith has announced plans to debate each of his followers on Twitter. The event, which Smith has dubbe...

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Local man 'could have sworn' John McCain was president

Funny story: Local man 'could have sworn' John McCain was president

While watching the Democratic National Convention yesterday, local resident Artye McDaniels, 103, was confused to find that Barack Obama is the president of the United States. "Obama is president, ya say?" A perplexed McDaniels said. "That can't...

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Frustrated college graduates wipe asses with diplomas

Funny story: Frustrated college graduates wipe asses with diplomas

U.S. college graduates, fed up with the job market and slow economy, have began wiping their asses with their diplomas in protest. The nationwide protests, known as the "Univershitty Protests," have spread online via social networks as th...

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'Best boyfriend ever' to leave half-eaten sandwich for girlfriend

Funny story: 'Best boyfriend ever' to leave half-eaten sandwich for girlfriend

In what may be the most thoughtful gesture of their 3-year relationship, Jake Harrington plans to leave his girlfriend Mary Rockmore a half-eaten bologna sandwich. Harrington said the thoughtful act, which occurs after the two had a long argumen...

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Allen defers interest in Heat

The sharp shooting guard Ray Allen will have no part in the Miami Heat organization after an overnight visit with the professional basketball team went "fucking terrible." Allen, who won his first NBA championship title with the Boston Celtics, is...

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Brief: Microsoft to release 'Playstation 3'

The first new video game console since 2006 is finally set to be released. Microsoft has unveiled its newest video game console, which it says far exceeds the capabilities of any game console on the market. The same company known for releasin...

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Breaking news…

Bill Cosby Contacts Kim Kardashian to See if She Can Get Him Pardoned

Kim told Cosby he would have to get in line behind Robert Mueller, Suge Knight, and Jared Folger.
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