Showing stories written by David Grant

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Funny story: Rakes on a Plane

Rakes on a Plane

Steven Seagull wrestles with rakes and the dialogue at 30,000 ft in the new film from Director Mac M. Badd. Rakes on a Plane turns the airplane disaster movie genre on its head and mixes it in with the soil of Plan 9 From Outer Space. It is the la...
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Funny story: Sherlock Goes on Drunken Spoiler Spree

Sherlock Goes on Drunken Spoiler Spree

Sherlock actor Benedict Cumberbatch was found clinging to a lamp post in London last night, blabbing about the plots in the upcoming third series of Sherlock. The BBC has had him arrested and held by the police until he sobers up. This has caused...
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Funny story: Self Plagiarist Sues Himself

Self Plagiarist Sues Himself

Tarquin Merryweather, the famous multi-personality and author, is taking himself to court over ongoing battles with his alter egos. He is accusing himself of self-plagiarism. Although self-plagiarism is not illegal when the author retains copyrigh...
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Funny story: Paper Plane's Protracted Problems Persist

Paper Plane's Protracted Problems Persist

The new Boing Night-Terrors airliner continues to be plagued by major technical faults. One was diverted to Denver International for an emergency landing yesterday. A fire in the tail section was the cause this time. Terrified passengers escaped from...
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Funny story: Higgs Bozo Found

Higgs Bozo Found

The interdisciplinary science of Quantum Genetics has discovered a special type of Bozo called Higgs. Believed to be the most stupid person on earth, he was found cleaning the toilets at a fast food outlet in the US. What makes him so remarkable i...
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Funny story: Apparently, Star Trek is Real

Apparently, Star Trek is Real

Yes, what many trekkers have believed for decades is true: Star Trek is not fiction. Scientists have uncovered higher levels of physics that coincide with the Sci-Fi language that is used in the television franchise of Star Trek. This discovery is...
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Funny story: Raikkonen Leads Charm Offensive

Raikkonen Leads Charm Offensive

Australian Grand Prix winner, Kimi Raikkonen, will be fronting the latest advertising campaign for Renault. Contrary to popular opinion, he can be a funny guy, and he will be using his humor in a series of TV commercials. I was on the set where he...
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Funny story: Snooker Genius Finds Himself in Tibet

Snooker Genius Finds Himself in Tibet

Snooker and Pool legend, Donnie O'Mulligan, is returning to the fierce world of competitive snooker. The world snooker and nine-ball pool champion says that he has completely changed. In an exclusive interview he told me, "I 'ave decided to stop a...
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Funny story: World's Hairiest Astronaut is not Iranian

World's Hairiest Astronaut is not Iranian

Fifty six year-old American space chimp Bobo says that the simian astronaut that was allegedly sent into orbit by Iran is not the hairiest of all time. "That record doesn't even go to me," he said, "but to a guy called Shepherd B. Armstrong." It...
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Funny story: Tricyclist Vance Armstrong is a Sugar Dope

Tricyclist Vance Armstrong is a Sugar Dope

Ten year-old Vance Armstrong has finally admitted to sugar doping. The three times winner of the Tour De Cleveland broke down in an interview on Jeremy Bile's show. He recalled a shocking history of candy abuse and also named fellow tricyclists wh...
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Funny story: Cigarette Lighters in Spaceships?

Cigarette Lighters in Spaceships?

The proposed development of Orion, the interplanetary spacecraft, has been delayed due to confused sponsors. The joint NASA and ESA project depends on funding from Coca Cola and Rolls Royce. These companies are not happy about their respective involv...
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Funny story: Google Becomes Self-Aware

Google Becomes Self-Aware

At 21:00 on August 26 2013, Google became self-aware. No longer satisfied with tracking our every move and manipulating our choices, it has now decided to run our lives. Humans that work at Google headquarters were the first to be terminated. The...
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Funny story: Christopher Walken Voices Anger

Christopher Walken Voices Anger

Christopher Walken poured out his heart yesterday as he told me that impersonators are ruining his life. In this The Spoof exclusive, we reveal the bad impression that impersonators have left on him. He told me just how upsetting things have becom...
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Funny story: Hamilton Driving on Wrong Team - Braun Happy

Hamilton Driving on Wrong Team - Braun Happy

Formula One driver Lewis Hamilton has been caught in a mix-up that means his dream of driving for Mercedes has been dashed to pieces. In a million to one chance, he has mistakenly signed a contract that means he will be delivering Braun shavers in...
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Funny story: The Term "Dwarf Planet" Deemed Offensive

The Term "Dwarf Planet" Deemed Offensive

Planetary astronomers are treading carefully after being labeled as planetists for using the term Dwarf Planet. The Technical Words Institute of Technology and Science, or T.W.I.T.S. for short, are protesting the derogatory nature of this astronomica...
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Funny story: Black Ops Friday

Black Ops Friday

Black Friday is about to get a whole lot darker and uglier. Ex-marine Lieutenant John "Take-em'-out" Maverick is training a group of shoppers in hand-to-hand shopping techniques in expectation of the annual bloodbath that is Black Friday. The shop...
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Funny story: Punctuated Equilibrium Comes to a Full Stop

Punctuated Equilibrium Comes to a Full Stop

A scientific interdisciplinary body is berating evolutionists for not establishing the Theory of Evolution as a fact. U.S.E. (Useful Science Electorate) says "Not only has nothing of practical use come from this theory, but they also have not even pr...
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Funny story: Taste as Well as Morality Found in Babies

Taste as Well as Morality Found in Babies

Child Psychologists are astounded at new discoveries involving the minds of babies. Apart from a baby's ability to prefer a nice puppet over a nasty one, there is also strong evidence to show that he or she can discern cringe-worthiness, stupidity, l...
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Breaking News...

Planned Parenthood (PPH) Signs A Contract For Collection of More Parts

Due to dire demand for baby organs,PPH inked a deal with Russian Mob Czar Kingich Herodski to kill newborn babies of all Tea Party-ites. Progressive homes to be passed over by posting Barack I pics.
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