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Funny story: Inquiry Launched into Incredible Amount of Inquiries Being Launched

Inquiry Launched into Incredible Amount of Inquiries Being Launched

A government spokesperson announced within the last hour that an urgent Inquiry was to be set up to investigate the huge amount of inquiries being set up to investigate anything and everything these days. He/she said that the Government had concer...
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Funny story: Nobel Peace Prize Awarded to Planet Mars

Nobel Peace Prize Awarded to Planet Mars

In a surprise development Thursday the Scandinavian prize-giving concern Nobel bestowed its annual peace prize on the planet Mars. Nobel (motto "We Give Prizes") described the planet Mars in its citation as a "tremendous force for good in an otherwis...
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Funny story: Romney Campaign in Crisis, says a Senior Insider

Romney Campaign in Crisis, says a Senior Insider

A senior figure inside Mitt Romney's faltering campaign for the Presidency said this morning "My - erm, I mean his - campaign has careered off the tracks, hit the buffers, gone over the edge." When asked by reporters to limit his argument to one r...
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Funny story: Cruise/Holmes Settlement Finally Hammered Out as Tom Agrees to Keep The Beckhams

Cruise/Holmes Settlement Finally Hammered Out as Tom Agrees to Keep The Beckhams

The divorce settlement between diminutive Hollywood heart-throb Tom Cruise and his unemployed wife Kate (nee Katie) Holmes - which had become increasingly acrimonious in recent days - was finally resolved late Sunday when Tom magnanimously agreed to...
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Funny story: Chelsea Bid for Power Station as Defensive Crisis Mounts

Chelsea Bid for Power Station as Defensive Crisis Mounts

Chelsea have lodged a "substantial" bid for the defunct Battersea power station as injuries and suspensions continue to decimate the heart of their defence. Chelsea chairman Bruce Buck revealed that the situation was increasingly becoming unsolvab...
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Funny story: Belgian Man Sues Language School when Subliminal Speak German CD causes him to Invade Poland

Belgian Man Sues Language School when Subliminal Speak German CD causes him to Invade Poland

Martin Krauthammer, a 41-year old Belgian national and middle-ranking functionary at the EU in Brussels, hoped in February that his career - and his unrequited love for German Chancellor Angela Merkel - could only be enhanced by learning to read and...
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Funny story: Ryan Giggs to Play On for A Hundred More Years!

Ryan Giggs to Play On for A Hundred More Years!

Ryan Giggs, the celebrated celebrity litigant and midfield maestro, has revealed to close friends and family that he wants to continue playing football until he is ONE HUNDRED AND FORTY! Giggs, a member of the much-vaunted Manchester United youth...
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Funny story: Osmonds and Nolans square off on Republican Nominee Race

Osmonds and Nolans square off on Republican Nominee Race

Two once-popular but long forgotten familial bands from the seventies, the Osmonds and the Nolans, have entered into a bizarre Twitter feud about their preferred Republican presidential nominees and their conflicting religiosities. The Osmonds fav...
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Funny story: Oscar Watch Fever Pitch

Oscar Watch Fever Pitch

As Oscar fever reaches fever pitch George Clooney has inflated himself with a potentially dangerous level of helium and is hovering several feet above Los Angeles spouting epithets. More surprisingly Brad Pitt, of whom nothing was expected, has ne...
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Funny story: Fred the Shred Offers to Buy Rangers

Fred the Shred Offers to Buy Rangers

Irresponsible Scots financier Fred Goodwin has lodged a bid with the club's administrators to buy Rangers. Fred, formerly Sir Fred, said in his shed that he had the funds to rescue the popular Unionist outfit from their current malaise. "I have -...
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Funny story: Rangers in Increasingly Desperate Bid to Thwart Taxman

Rangers in Increasingly Desperate Bid to Thwart Taxman

Rangers, the beleaguered, debt-ridden Scottish football giants appear to have devised a cunning but legally dubious plan to evade the close attentions of the UK tax authorities who claim they are owed two trillion pounds in back taxes and national in...
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Funny story: Kelsey Grammar Sues David Cronenberg

Kelsey Grammar Sues David Cronenberg

Kelsey Grammar, the widely-adored and intellectual humorist, has filed a lawsuit with the Hollywood Supreme Court claiming that the widely-avoided and misanthropic director David Cronenberg has "totally ripped off" his popular and much-loved "Frasier...
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Funny story: Blackburn Rovers are Becoming Ridiculous, says a Man

Blackburn Rovers are Becoming Ridiculous, says a Man

A man said earlier today that Blackburn Rovers, the much-loved northern soccer club, are becoming ridiculous. When pressed on his astonishing accusation the man, 45, said that every time they appear in the newspapers or on Sky Sports News, Blackbu...
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Funny story: Condoleezza Rice Voted World's Sexiest Woman

Condoleezza Rice Voted World's Sexiest Woman

Hot magazine's eagerly awaited annual survey of the world's sexiest women - which independent arbitrators have established has scientific value because it includes maths and stuff - has unexpectedly named former US Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice...
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Funny story: Queen Stripped Of Title

Queen Stripped Of Title

The Queen, anachronistic monarch of the United Kingdom, has had her historical crown taken away from her by the Forfeiture Commitee. This little known and un-elected room-full of toffs - who the other day stripped poor old Fred Goodwin of his knig...
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Funny story: Transfer Deadline Day: Liverpool sign Celtic

Transfer Deadline Day: Liverpool sign Celtic

In one of the more unexpected transfer deadline day deals Liverpool have signed the entire playing squad, coaching staff and fan base of top Scottish club Glasgow Celtic. Kenny Dalglish, Liverpool manager and also one of Celtic's most legendary pl...
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Funny story: Prime Minister admits Impotent Bewilderment at EU Guile

Prime Minister admits Impotent Bewilderment at EU Guile

The UK Prime Minister David Cameron admitted to MPs during his statement this afternoon to the House of Commons on yesterday's EU emergency summit that he really had no idea how cunning and manipulative his European Union partners could be in circumv...
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Funny story: European Union Installs Sir Jeremy Paxman as Greek Premier

European Union Installs Sir Jeremy Paxman as Greek Premier

In a surprise announcement at tonight's EU summit in Brussels Sir Jeremy Paxman - the popularly churlish BBC interrogator - has been appointed head of the Greek government. Head of the EU Mme Christine Lagarde said Sir Jeremy was the ideal candida...
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Santa's Grotto now to include Customer Returns Line

Unwanted Presents can now be returned over a Lapland phone - line. Elves won't man phones as headsets incompatible with Ears.
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