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QPR look to offload Michael Dawson

QPR have placed £9million Michael Dawson on the transfer list - despite the defender yet to agree personal terms on a move to QPR. Dawson is currently negotiating a four-year deal to sign for QPR, but will be forced to accept a sell-on clause for...

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Neil Warnock loving trouble and strife in the smoke

Neil Warnock has admitted he never thought he would settle in London, but has been pleasantly surprised. "I love London. Everyone said it's full of twats, but that couldn't be further from the truth. I moved my family into a nice 3-bed maisonette...

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QPR boss Neil Warnock pins hopes on 'Ade for Adel'

QPR manager Neil Warnock has helped come to the rescue of Adel Taarabt's near-poverty status by recording a song to raise funds for his talented talisman. "I understand living in London on twenty five grand a week can be tough, little wonder Adel...

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QPR mascot Jude the Cat being hunted by Neil Warnock

QPR's newly reintroduced club mascot, Jude the Cat, has gone into hiding after claims by Neil Warnock the moggy divulged top secret information to Blackburn manager Steve Kean. "I had the subs warming up at the break, knowing Steve Kean and his p...

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Adel Taarabt reveals truth behind bus strop drama

Adel Taarabt has revealed exactly what happened to him when substituted at half time in QPR's 6-0 trouncing at Fulham. "I said to the gaffer at half-time the system wasn't working. Let's go 4-4-2 - I said I'd gladly make way for Tommy Smith. So he...

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Shaun's derriere not up for probing

QPR's Shaun Derry has revealed he was subjected to verbal abuse over his sexuality whilst out shopping last week. The midfielder was purchasing some Yakult probiotic bifidobacterium yoghurt drinks in his local Budgens, when he was approached by a...

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QPR star Adel Taarabt considers name change

QPR playmaker Adel Taarabt is considering changing his name - because he's getting fed up with people mispronouncing it. "Everyone gets it wrong, it's pronounced 'Ter-rat' - but hardly anyone says it properly," he said after finishing training tod...

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QPR schemer Joey Barton 'not obsessed by Twitter' claims agent

Funny story: QPR schemer Joey Barton 'not obsessed by Twitter' claims agent

After another controversial weekend on the Twitter front, Joey Barton's agent has claimed his player is not overly obsessed by Twitter, in fact it actually helps him stay away from more trouble. "Joey's a good lad, so what if he likes to 'Tweet' n...

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QPR go back to the future

New QPR supremo Tony Fernades has revealed more plans to restore some of QPR's past back into the Club, after Flavio Briatore and Bernie Ecclestone almost ripped up its heritage. "I've had calls to bring back this, and bring back that, and some of...

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QPR striker Patrick Agyemang to appear on Strictly

According to rumour, Patrick Agyemang is set to appear in the 2011 series of 'Strictly Come Dancing'. The QPR star striker, who has appeared in the majority of Premiership games played so far this season, was controversially left out of Neil Warno...

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Breaking news…

Trump Now Also President of Egypt

President Donald Trump now claims to be part Egyptian after a new mummy was uncovered. Noted the President, "Look! It's old, wrinkly, shriveled, and orange! Just like me!"
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