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Funny story:  Random Questions to Strangers Outlawed

Random Questions to Strangers Outlawed

In a bid to curb unnecessary discomfort, bewilderment and mild irritation a nationwide ban has been placed on all situations where a person may need to ask one or more strangers a basic question. The ban is expected to run for six months. Question...
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Funny story:  Calls For Mandatory Use of Helmets In Professional Boxing

Calls For Mandatory Use of Helmets In Professional Boxing

Tonight's World Heavyweight Championship bout between Eugene 'Swarfega hands' Smalls and Louis 'The Lepor' Trunks ended in farce as Smalls attempted to strum the tune to 'The Ballad of Richard Nixon' by John Denver and Trunks began some kind of upsid...
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Funny story:  Football fans responsible for dirty dishes

Football fans responsible for dirty dishes

Bad news if you do not have a dishwasher and like eating your food using clean cutlery and sparkling plates. West Ham fans, including Ray Winstone, Danny Dyer and some movie person who once saw them on the TV have exhausted the UK's supply of fairy l...
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Funny story:  You can't do THAT on TV!

You can't do THAT on TV!

Samantha 'Stiff neck, prominent jaw line, unflinching eyes and mechanical mouth' Jones has caused surprise and uproar today after she was spotted showing what appeared to be some kind of human emotion. After hearing about Tennis player Andy Murr...
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Funny story:  The Subterranean Homesick News!

The Subterranean Homesick News!

Bad news is set to hit everyone this week as large swathes of armed robbery, parliamentary fraud and not to mention the worst weather since records began are due in the UK. It is predicted to be worse than the last time absolutely nothing at all hap...
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Funny story:  Childbirth vs a kick in the privates, which is more painful?

Childbirth vs a kick in the privates, which is more painful?

Angry scenes at A&E tonight as a man and woman, Barry Nutsafe and Dawn Moulds are having a 'pain-off', just to see which is more painful. Being kicked in the privates or childbirth. We have an audience including staff having fag breaks, peopl...
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Funny story:  'A Flock of Seagulls' attack pensioner

'A Flock of Seagulls' attack pensioner

Eighties new wave band 'A flock of seagulls' have today been bailed pending further investigation after it was reported they had swarmed and beaten down an OAP on Brighton pier last October. The band, fronted by a man who's hair looks like a set...
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Funny story:  'Excellent' Food Critic Loses It

'Excellent' Food Critic Loses It

World renowned food critic 'just one more' Larry Le Cellar-door last night shocked attendees at the '7even' restaurant a la 'fit to bursting' pub, aka 'tramp-shed', Chiswick. Everyone at the table had just sat down for their meals when Mr. Cellar...
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Funny story:  Man loses/leaves wife in drawers for five years

Man loses/leaves wife in drawers for five years

The world finally learned today of a man who had misplaced his wife, Irene Bumblekiss, in the Liverpool address of one of his previous residences. After being questioned this morning the man said he'd completely forgotten about her and couldn't ev...
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Funny story:  Apple Creates New Jobs

Apple Creates New Jobs

Technofiles rejoice! Apple have unveiled the latest addition to their ever expanding army of sense assaulting machines. 5S-teve! Included with this release will be a free download of IOS Jobs. The update comes with ruthless business acumen, foldi...
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Funny story:  Girl carried off into space amid fears for lost balloon

Girl carried off into space amid fears for lost balloon

Worried parents and performing clowns have been seated watching news24 for the last 72 hours, biting eyebrows and clipping unwanted chattering teeth after somegirl, someplace, it was Alice but not their Alcie disspersed into the winds surrounding her...
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Funny story:  Wind causes massive structural damage to everything in the world!

Wind causes massive structural damage to everything in the world!

Following last week's barometer breaking wind speeds, officials from someplace have announced plans to erect new wind breakers at several key locations around the United Kingdoom. Many unsavouries, previously thought upon as being especially savo...
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Funny story:  I can't believe it's not terrorism!

I can't believe it's not terrorism!

Police looking into the tragic death of a 79-year-old man from Liverpool, now say that they are seriously considering treating the matter as an act of terrorism. The man (who may also have been a terrorist) was severely wounded in the incident and he...
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Funny story:  The Case of The Mysterious Face Jammer

The Case of The Mysterious Face Jammer

Panic in the streets of small town continued tonight as the mysterious face jammer claimed yet another victim, this time outside of the bespoke chickens shop on 'dash-it-all street'. Chief inspector Williams has been drafted in from the 'super-duper...
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Funny story:  Facebook? More like the good book!

Facebook? More like the good book!

Real life stories of revelations and resurrections will soon be making their way to your smart phone (smarter than you!) or desktop computer. Jesus Christ or as he is more commonly known, J-Sizzle, has joined the social media revolution. It is a...
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Funny story:  Big turnout for people who are voting about the general issues in their country and the parties who are contesting for power.

Big turnout for people who are voting about the general issues in their country and the parties who are contesting for power.

A general erection today for everybody in Britain, and what a big one it was with hundreds of inhabitants turning out in their thousands to vote on the important issues of today. As it were there was a landslide for the nutty natters over 90's nudist...
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Funny story:  Jobless Youth Finally Sort Themselves Out

Jobless Youth Finally Sort Themselves Out

Feelings of total ambivalence overtook each other today as 2,000 mud-slinging, disease ridden peasants of the underworld descended on Trafalgar Square. Cries of outrage and shrieks of gay abandonment were heard for miles around as thirty years of...
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Funny story:  Ferguson Rules Out Berbatov

Ferguson Rules Out Berbatov

Manchester United manager Sir Alex Ferguson has today ruled out striker Dimitar Berbatov. The news came as a shock to the room full of unscrupulous underhanded weasels with most viewing this as a step too far from the 69 year old Scot. Reporters...
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True Facts From Snoops #1345

When alarmed, Oprah Winfrey can swell up to five times her normal size. She was taught this by Dr. Oz.

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