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Funny story:  Joey Barton "I'm innocent!"

Joey Barton "I'm innocent!"

Joey Barton has hit back at accusations that he is a thug and should not be allowed on a football field after allegedly "punching" Blackburn's Morten Gamst Pederson last night at St James Park. "There was a fly on his shirt so I swatted...
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Funny story:  Jedward go to the movies!

Jedward go to the movies!

I can confirm rumours today that John and Edward Grimes are to go into movies and have won the title roles in a remake of the movie Dumb and Dumber. "We start filming next week in Ireland" a movie source said "We have to iron out a few prob...
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Funny story:  French fried!

French fried!

With the Joint Armed Forces Treaty between France and the UK being signed today it has been revealed that all British tanks will be refurbished to accommodate the French when on operations in War zones. Manufacturers have already said th...
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Funny story:  Mary to join Girls Aloud!

Mary to join Girls Aloud!

In another X Factor exclusive we can reveal that Irish "diva" Mary Byrne will leave her checkout job at Tesco's to become the new member of Girls Aloud when she leaves the competition. "With Cheryl's busy schedule and Nadine's reluctance to be...
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Funny story:  Rooney in U-Turn shock!

Rooney in U-Turn shock!

In an amazing U-turn - Wayne Rooney has decided to stay in Manchester for another five years. This just two days after the 24-year-old hitman claimed " the city's failure to attract world-class prostitutes to Old Trafford area prompted his dec...
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Breaking News...

Microwave Attachment Eliminates Need For Head Shaving

Hyram B. Dison's invention, which eliminates daily head shaving, is now on sale. "Microcaps" use a microwave to defoliate scalps with a rubber skull attachment similar to ones used in electric chairs.

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