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Ewan McGregor issues public apology

LONDON - Actor Ewan McGregor today apologised for, "pissing away my talent." The formerly credible movie star expressed his regret at taking roles on the basis of money and exposure, rather than artistic integrity and merit. "I don't know what ha...

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Peter Andre "admitted to psychiatric hospital."

Unconfirmed reports seem to indicate that 'singer' Peter Andre has been admitted to a mental institution after suffering a total and irreversible breakdown. Sources are believed to have called for Andre to be sectioned under the Mental Health Act...

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White House flipped upside down

Funny story: White House flipped upside down

Shocking scenes today at the White House as an educated, wealthy white man in his forties ran around, doing what he was told by a black man. David Cameron, the British Prime Minister, was obsequious to an alarming degree and even referred to Bar...

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Jesus and Mohammad to have cage fight

Funny story: Jesus and Mohammad to have cage fight

In an act designed to discover which religion is the one true faith, plans have been announced for Jesus and Mohammed to stage a cage fight. Speaking from Heaven, God said earlier that, "My boy is a lot tougher than people think he is. That 'turn...

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Kerry Katona in "no news" shock

British huge titted mentalist, Kerry Katona last night revealed that she had not acted in a newsworthy way for over a week. "I don't know how it happened," she simpered to the one remaining British reporter with any sympathy left towards her. "...

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Katie Price to "sell own faeces."

Funny story: Katie Price to "sell own faeces."

Katie Price - aka Jordan - earlier announced plans to bottle and sell her own waste products. "It just made sense," she told assembled journalists and perverts. "Every other aspect of my life is a financial commodity, so I figured - why not my sh...

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"Whole world against me, so I'm leaving!" blasts Gibson

Mel Gibson, currently coming under much criticism due to racist and sexist outbursts recorded by his estranged ex-girlfriend and mother of his daughter, Oskana Grigorieva, today called a press conference outlining his plans to live on the moon. "T...

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Breaking news…

National Park Service Rewrites Statue of Liberty Plaque

"Give me your strong, your rich, your workers yearning to breathe capitalism. Send no homeless, impoverished, or those seeking refuge from MS-13 to me. I want no trash to tarnish our golden door."
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