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Showing stories written by Guy Bellefonte

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Funny story:  Storage wars star bids on locker with homeless man

Storage wars star bids on locker with homeless man

You never know what you'll find in an abandoned storage locker. But this? On Tuesday morning the winning bidder walked away with a few old CDs, a hot plate, and former mortgage broker, Skip Kendall. Kendall, had been living out of Storage Un...
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Funny story:  Penis cameras give OBGYN's an inside look on patients

Penis cameras give OBGYN's an inside look on patients

Cold hands, hard to get appointments and embarrassing trips to the OBGYN will soon be a thing of the past thanks to a micro camera that snugly fits to the tip of any erect penis. The penis camera. It's really a shock that this technology took so...
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Funny story:  Crack Whores Report Higher Than Expected 1st Quarter Earnings

Crack Whores Report Higher Than Expected 1st Quarter Earnings

Going into this afternoon's earnings report, analysts had been expecting to see crack whores report earnings of 50 cents per share. Excluding one time items, crack whores stated their quarterly earnings were 54 cents. During the same period last y...
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Funny story:  Car owner unsure if vehicle will last the winter

Car owner unsure if vehicle will last the winter

The rattling in Jim Duncan's 1994 Pontiac is getting difficult to ignore. As winter quickly approaches, Duncan has been biting his nails at the thought of a major repair. "Any repair over $900 bucks ain't worth doing, so I don't know what they he...
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Funny story:  Earth Caretakers Lose Funding

Earth Caretakers Lose Funding

The duo of Earl and Dale, aliens that are responsible for keeping Earth from destruction ala Horton Hears a Who, have reportedly lost funding from their government. Troubled economic times have spilled over to the universe leading several economis...
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Funny story:  Tramp Stamp Barcodes Slow Spread of STD's

Tramp Stamp Barcodes Slow Spread of STD's

Tramp stamps are predicted to reduce STD's by 75% over the next 5 years thanks to a new barcoding system that can quickly pull up your new lover's STD history. The technology is still new, but the idea is spreading like herpes on a pirate ship.
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Funny story:  Boston Transplant Brings Wicked Hardcore Phrases to Tampa Area

Boston Transplant Brings Wicked Hardcore Phrases to Tampa Area

Sean McGinn moved to the Tampa Bay area 6 months ago, leaving behind his Boston roots for some fun-in-the-sun. Locals cannot decide if they dislike his haircut or dumb accent worse. "Everything with this asshole is like; yo, that's wicked hardcor...
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Funny story:  Obese Excited About Future of Feedbags

Obese Excited About Future of Feedbags

Busy Americans have limited time to eat meals, which is why Danish company, Glutony, has introduced "The Hunger Bag" Hungry Americans can take this designer bag to a select group of participating restaurants who will fill it to the brim with a r...
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Funny story:  Bow Tie Wearing Men 10 Times More Likely To Be Labeled Douchebags

Bow Tie Wearing Men 10 Times More Likely To Be Labeled Douchebags

A revealing study today learned that pompous pricks that insist on wearing bow ties are at a 10 times greater risk of being labeled a douchebag. More than 250 people were asked their opinions about men wearing bow ties and the overwhelming respons...
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Funny story:  Frustration leads to apathy as Americans lose interest in government

Frustration leads to apathy as Americans lose interest in government

The once mighty fists that pumped at the screen while Sean Hannity preached about the socialist government have turned to mild shoulder shrugs as Americans realize that there is nothing they can do about it. "I was so angry about the bailouts, the...
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Funny story:  Mardi Gras Band Features Rusty Trombone

Mardi Gras Band Features Rusty Trombone

Look out Saints: there's a new band marching into town and it's as queer as a three dollar bill! Critically acclaimed Mardi Gras band, the Ram Rod Express, will be featuring a new twist to their act; the rusty trombone. The rusty trombone was...
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Funny story:  Whore refuses to delete incriminating text message

Whore refuses to delete incriminating text message

It's the principle of the situation. Or at least that's what Alexis Steele is telling her ex-lover and married man, Gregory Spike. Steele has been holding on to a very incriminating text message from Spike which could land him in very hot water...
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Funny story:  Snuff Film Director Dead at 69

Snuff Film Director Dead at 69

Max "Snuff" Winters passed away peacefully Tuesday morning after battling bone cancer for the past 6 months. Fans remember Winters as being the revolutionary snuff film director that produced such top hits as "Bitch Gonna Give Some Head and Die" and...
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Funny story:  Board Game "Spot the North Korean" Hits Shelves

Board Game "Spot the North Korean" Hits Shelves

Have you ever wanted the ability to differentiate between North Koreans, South Koreans, Chinese, Japanese, Vietnamese and Cambodians? Thanks to toy manufacturer, Nip Nap Games, your wish can be a reality. Spot the North Korean is both educational...
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Funny story:  Weed Dealer App rejected by DEA and FCC

Weed Dealer App rejected by DEA and FCC

Thanks to a ruling which was initiated by the DEA and the FCC, Americans will no longer be allowed to located the closest weed deal with their smart phone. This is strange because you would think that the DEA would want to be able to locate drug dea...
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Funny story:  Crayon Manufacturer Introduces Obama Color

Crayon Manufacturer Introduces Obama Color

Move over Hunter Green, there's a new cool color in town and it's name is Obama Brown. Cuckold Crayons announced in a press release Tuesday that they will be adding the Obama crayon to their set of 65 crayons. The company stated that the new colo...
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Funny story:  Study Shows Organic Water May Be Toxic

Study Shows Organic Water May Be Toxic

Pittsburgh Organic Water bottling company, H2 uh-oh, sells consumers on the idea of "fresh water." Critics and scientists say this product may be too fresh. The water is served in a clear bottle however the end product has a tannish brown color w...
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Funny story:  Black Friday Bowel Movement Called Legendary

Black Friday Bowel Movement Called Legendary

Supermart shoppers were treated to some fantastic bargains this Black Friday, but they never expected to be around greatness. Hank Newburg was with his wife and admits to overeating on the Thanksgiving holiday. "I ate so much turkey and stuffin...
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Breaking News...

John Walsh's PTSD doctor in plagiarism scandal

Army doctor filed the same medical review hundreds of times for soldiers looking to get tax free disability pay!

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