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Funny story: Winter Solstice: bookies suspend odds on Queen ejaculating - no, wait...abdicating!

Winter Solstice: bookies suspend odds on Queen ejaculating - no, wait...abdicating!

Cyberspace - A ton of money has been bet on Queen Elizardbirth fabricating from the Throne of Albion on Sunday's upcoming Feast of Yule. Odds setters at global internet spread betting giant Aintgottaprayer.con said today they'd been looking at eme...
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Funny story: Festive cheer as Obama announces new weed deal with Cuba

Festive cheer as Obama announces new weed deal with Cuba

Washington DC - It's being hailed as the most significant policy shift since the 1960 embargo banned imports of Fidel's Amnesia cannabis strains. This morning President Obama announced a historic breakthrough in US Cuba policy following decades o...
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Funny story: So who in the Qatari royal family is a nervous pooper? Real estate blog demands answers

So who in the Qatari royal family is a nervous pooper? Real estate blog demands answers

New York - A website specialising in grotty teardowns is spilling some dodgy Middle Eastern royals' digestive secrets based on recently published property refurbishment plans. MyBigFatQatari Gazumper.con has published details of a lavish $320m man...
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Funny story: CIA torturers 'mostly Skull & Bonesmen' claims secret Mossad report

CIA torturers 'mostly Skull & Bonesmen' claims secret Mossad report

Washington - A sinister cabal of Skull & Bonesmen masterminded CIA torture according to a leaked Israeli intelligence report. The Mossad Canary Juice division analysed hundreds of hours of harsh CIA irrigations - uh, interrogations. Their f...
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Funny story: Jerry Garcia's Grateful Dead Sea Scrolls up for auction

Jerry Garcia's Grateful Dead Sea Scrolls up for auction

Los Angeles - Discovered in an ancient Qumran recording studio built by Garcia's ancestors circa 5,000BC** the Scrolls have been listed by Frank N Steinz auctioneers at a fixed reserve of one million bucks. The Greatful Dead lead guitarist broug...
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Funny story: Angelina Joile Goes Down With A Dose Of The Pox

Angelina Joile Goes Down With A Dose Of The Pox

Los Angeles - Doctors at Hollywood's Seedy Sign Eye Hospital have diagnosed a dose of the Pox behind Ms's Jolie's abrupt withdrawal from Monday's premiere of her movie Unhinged. The actress, 69, began sprouting pustules of the contagious disease f...
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Funny story: Shrink paid $81m to coach CIA torturers says 'Because I'm Worth It'

Shrink paid $81m to coach CIA torturers says 'Because I'm Worth It'

Langley, Virginia - "It was no bum deal," said Professor Einstein Flintstone, a former Pentagon psychiatrist on secondment to train fledgling CIA torturers in the dark arts of rectal feeding plus other recreational crap. "And what's more that much...
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Funny story: Calls for UK judge-led cover-up into British complicity with CIA torture

Calls for UK judge-led cover-up into British complicity with CIA torture

London - A trawl of the great and good in Britain's senior judiciary has narrowed down a list of candidates capable of bullshitting in the international premier league. Top pick for a prolonged and tortuous televised whitewash guaranteed to flush...
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Funny story: Blair fingers Bush as CIA torture files published

Blair fingers Bush as CIA torture files published

Washington AC/DC - Ghastly Poodlefaker Tony B Liar has blamed digital manipulation by his brother George Dubya Bush for leaving him up shit creek without the proverbial paddle. The rant comes as a US Senate Committee publishes its long-awaited re...
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Funny story: OMG, Monica Lewinsky and Glooble's Larry Page are birth twins, Hillary their feckless Mom

OMG, Monica Lewinsky and Glooble's Larry Page are birth twins, Hillary their feckless Mom

Washington AC/DC - There was shock in Capitol Hill today as a Congressional Committee with oversight of Cold War cover-ups screwed up badly in the hysterical - ah, historical! - DNA department handling so called US presidential cold sperm files.
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Funny story: Wall Street unimpressed with scrounger royals

Wall Street unimpressed with scrounger royals

New York - The big money fixers are staying away in droves as Prince William and his gargoyle wife arrive in NYC rattling their sadass begging bowls. Up to a dozen City Z-LIsters have forked out fifty grand a piece to hobnob with the faux royals w...
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Funny story: Pope fires head of private army, says hat 'wasn't pointy enough' - reports

Pope fires head of private army, says hat 'wasn't pointy enough' - reports

Rome - The big cheese in charge of guarding the Pope has been booted out of the Vatican for violating its strict regimental dress code. Commander Guido Emmental's brightly colored Comb Moron - uh, Comb Morion! - a traditional helmet made from alt...
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Funny story: Bush Twins 'shagged the White House janitor' says Jenna Hager

Bush Twins 'shagged the White House janitor' says Jenna Hager

Washington AC/DC - "And next thing you know the guy's suddenly President," Dubya's daughter said today, "one helluva career move considering he used to mop the White House floor." Jenna Bush Hager and her twin Barbara were appearing on Wednesday n...
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Funny story: So who's the PR genius pimping for Rafael Correa's Ecuador?

So who's the PR genius pimping for Rafael Correa's Ecuador?

Brooklyn, NY - A shady stone-age Neanderthal has been identified as the brains behind a Brooklyn PR outfit paid $6.4m to pimp out corrupt-as-hell Ecuador. Dr Einstein Flintstone is CEO of Brooklyn-based EmCee Squared Corp, described as a thriving...
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Funny story: Bwahaha! Falling oil prices send Russian oligarchs cap-in-hand to Wonga

Bwahaha! Falling oil prices send Russian oligarchs cap-in-hand to Wonga

Hole in the Wall Street, Moscow - Usury is thriving once again in Moscow's financial district with payday lenders shamelessly jacking up their base rates as a surge of cash-strapped oligarchs comes a-begging following a plunge on the global price of...
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Funny story: IS jihadis grooming flock of Mongolian ostriches for bomb vest attacks

IS jihadis grooming flock of Mongolian ostriches for bomb vest attacks

Syrian Border, Middle East - The renegades' drone program took a sinister twist today after a heavily kitted out ostrich was captured by Iraqi farces complete with bomb vest, surveillance camera and GPS tracker ahead of a covert suicide mission.
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Funny story: New biography says Barack Obama shagged Amal Clooney

New biography says Barack Obama shagged Amal Clooney

Washington AC/DC - And Halle Berry, Erin Nordegren plus both the Williams Sisters, Rebekah Brooks and dozens more. Author Lakeesha Xanadu's smash-hit tome claims lawyer Amal Clooney is Malia Obama's real mom and that DNA squabs - uh, swabs! - prov...
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Funny story: Thy Prince Doth Strip Ye Wife Of Royal Name

Thy Prince Doth Strip Ye Wife Of Royal Name

Thighland - Crown Prince Vagina Long Horn - uh, Vajiralongkorn! - has asked the government to strip his wife's family at a government nudist colony in Cow Loon. The order comes after two thousand of her close relatives were arrested for corruptio...
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Showing page 1 (of 385 pages)
Breaking News...

Banks will close even earlier on Shortest Day

Banks already close too early for most people's convenience. They will close at 11 am, on the shortest day, this year 'because we can 'says Exec.
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