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Melania To Gorilla Glue Donald's Package To Bed Frame

Funny story: Melania To Gorilla Glue Donald's Package To Bed Frame

BILLINGSGATE POST: If stuff like this can be fabricated, then Fake News has to be taken seriously. From an exclusive interview appearing in today's edition of the Slovenia Times, it is reported that Melania Trump has decided to do something ab...

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Penis Pumps: Draining The Swamp In Washington

Funny story: Penis Pumps: Draining The Swamp In Washington

BILLINGSGATE POST: Drifting under the cover of shadows that share the darkness enveloping the Beltway in Washington, the organic throb of millions of penis pumps might someday be utilized to drain the murky swamp that smothers everyday political re...

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John Conyers: HANDS UP! (Her Thigh In Church) DON'T SHOOT!

Funny story: John Conyers: HANDS UP! (Her Thigh In Church) DON'T SHOOT!

BILLINGSGATE POST: In the aftermath of the shooting of Michael Brown by a police officer in Ferguson, Missouri, protesters would confront cops by screaming "HANDS UP! DON"T SHOOT" whenever there was a demonstration in cities throughout the United St...

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Harvey Feinstein To Challenge Dianne Weinstein In Senate Primary

Funny story: Harvey Feinstein To Challenge Dianne Weinstein In Senate Primary

BREAKING NEWS: BILLINGSGATE POST Crack investigative reporter Slim Everdingle writes that three sources with inside knowledge revealed to him that beleaguered prevert Harvey Feinstein intends to enter California's 2018 Senate race against Dianne Wei...

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Robert Mueller To Trump: Don't call me Fly Face!

Funny story: Robert Mueller To Trump: Don't call me Fly Face!

BILLINGSGATE POST: One of the most disgusting villains in the chronicles of crime was Felix Weatherlimmp, aka Fly Face; a one time Washington lawyer who was constantly surrounded by a cloud of flies. Fly Face often partnered with crime boss William M...

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Nancy Pelosi Diagnosed With Terminal Persimmon Winter-Kill Syndrome

Funny story: Nancy Pelosi Diagnosed With Terminal Persimmon Winter-Kill Syndrome

BILLINGSGATE POST: In an interview this morning on MSNBC, House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi referred to President Bush three different times in a rambling, incoherent discussion regarding the failure of the Administration to repeal or change ObamaCa...

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Putin Tells Trump: "James Comey Was One Of Ours"

Funny story: Putin Tells Trump: "James Comey Was One Of Ours"

DATELINE HAMBURG: In the first face-to-face meeting between Vladimir Putin and President Trump, a simple, six word statement from Putin verified what many in the looking glass, spy vs spy world of espionage already believed: "James Comey was one...

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Dykes On Bikes And Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence Withdraw Support For Nancy Pelosi

Funny story: Dykes On Bikes And Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence Withdraw Support For Nancy Pelosi

BILLINGSGATE POST: The San Francisco Chapter of Dykes on Bikes announced today that they were joining with The Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence in a boycott of Congresswoman Nancy Pelosi. In 1976, a small group of women motorcyclists gathered at th...

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Slim Everdingle: Looking For Leg In All The Wrong Places

Funny story: Slim Everdingle: Looking For Leg In All The Wrong Places

BILLINGSGATE POST: As earlier reported, erstwhile lover Slim Everdingle lost one of his legs while in an amorous tryst with Annibal Lector, the daughter of infamous cannibal, Hannibal Lector. Not a handsome man; some would say he was downright ug...

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Comey: Trump's Albino Raccoon Hairpiece Could Be Subpoenaed

Funny story: Comey: Trump's Albino Raccoon Hairpiece Could Be Subpoenaed

BILLINGSGATE POST: Testifying before the Senate Intelligence Committee last week, former FBI Director James Comey swore under oath that he believes President Trump's albino raccoon hairpiece must have been wired during their private meeting last mon...

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Trump: Evidence James Comey Was Double Agent For KGB

Funny story: Trump: Evidence James Comey Was Double Agent For KGB

BILLINGSGATE POST: Referring to recently released Cold War documents that reveal that former FBI Director James Comey is the son of Julius and Ethel Rosenberg, President Trump believes Comey was covertly working for the Soviet KGB. The Rosenbergs we...

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Trump Tweets Big Three European Heads: From Merkel To Macron To May

Funny story: Trump Tweets Big Three European Heads: From Merkel To Macron To May

BILLINGSGATE POST: Trump Tweets Limerick Response To Big Three: From Merkel to Macron to May, Three leaders with feet made of clay. While Merkel is a dumb kraut, And Macron looks like a bean sprout. Only May knows how to sashay.

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Trump's Albino Raccoon Hairpiece Was Source Of Leaked Secrets

Funny story: Trump's Albino Raccoon Hairpiece Was Source Of Leaked Secrets

BILLINGSGATE POST: The sun rose earlier than expected at the White House. Even the prickly pears were more prickly. The frantic search for the source of leaks emanating from the White House had put everyone on edge. Long-time Secret Service agent S...

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Maxine Waters Claims Vladimir Putin Bit Her Neck With Her Own False Teeth

Funny story: Maxine Waters Claims Vladimir Putin Bit Her Neck With Her Own False Teeth

BILLINGSGATE POST: First she claimed that Vladimir Putin used her own false teeth to bite her on the neck in a tony Moscow Karaoke bar. Seems he didn't like her rendition of "Georgia on My Mind." Then she said that he grabbed her James Brown wig be...

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Nancy Pelosi Accuses Republicans Of Taxing Stay-At-Home Mom's Imputed Income

Funny story: Nancy Pelosi Accuses Republicans Of Taxing Stay-At-Home Mom's Imputed Income

BILLINGSGATE POST: House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi told Joe Scarborough and his nodding accomplice, Mika, that the Republicans will attempt to balance the budget by taxing the imputed income of mothers who stay at home to care for their children.

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Man Swallowed By Snake: Pet Gerbil Unable To Save Him

Funny story: Man Swallowed By Snake: Pet Gerbil Unable To Save Him

BILLINGSGATE POST: A heartbreaking story from Sulawesi, Indonesia. According to local news reports, the body found inside a 23-foot python turned out to be a 23-year-old man named Akbar who had been reported missing by his wife. Authorities there...

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Primate And Zoo Handler Say "I Do"

Funny story: Primate And Zoo Handler Say "I Do"

BILLINGSGATE POST: In a rare confluence of legal issues that point out the problems that ensue when there is a conflict with the Law of Nature and the Law of Man, the ACLU and the Lambda Legal Defense have agreed to defend the right of Jake the Prim...

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The Spoof To Buy Out The Onion In Hostile Takeover

Funny story: The Spoof To Buy Out The Onion In Hostile Takeover

WALL STREET URINAL: In a stunning development, The Spoof said today that it will acquire The Onion to create the world's largest fake news media company under one roof. The Onion proclaims itself as the world's leading news publication and enjoys...

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Breaking news…

Philadelphia Eagles Only Need 2-Passenger Corvette For Official White House Visit After Winning Super Bowl Team

The delegation was the team coach who lost the coin toss and the team driver. The rest boycotted.
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