Showing:

Showing stories written by BillBritton

Try another search?

Showing page 1 (of 5 pages)
Funny story:  Gov. Christie Selects Curses for Swearing-In Ceremony

Gov. Christie Selects Curses for Swearing-In Ceremony

Special to TPN - Special assistant Goober Flatus announced that New Jersey governor Chris Christie has chosen the curse words to be used in his second inaugural speech following the swearing-in ceremony on Tuesday, January 21. "The governor has worke...
View 'Gov. Christie Selects Curses for Swearing-In Ceremony'
Funny story:  Gov. Christie to Compete in NYC Marathon

Gov. Christie to Compete in NYC Marathon

Special to TPN - Governor Chris Christie of New Jersey will be competing in the New York City Marathon to be held on November 2, 2014. Contrary to rumor, all lanes will be open on the Verrazano Bridge section of the course, but the center lane will b...
View 'Gov. Christie to Compete in NYC Marathon'
Funny story:  President Obama to Reinvent the Wheel

President Obama to Reinvent the Wheel

Special to TPN - After the resounding success of the Affordable Care Act (aka Obamacare), President Obama has decided to launch a new effort to reinvent the wheel. Leading this initiative will be former U.S. President Jimmy Carter, best known for hav...
View 'President Obama to Reinvent the Wheel'
Funny story:  Chewing Gum: The New Pavement Protector

Chewing Gum: The New Pavement Protector

Special to TPN - Constance Masticar, of the International Chewing Gum association, released data that offered hope for the world's deteriorating infrastructure: "Chewing gum has been building up on the world's paved surfaces since it was first used 9...
View 'Chewing Gum: The New Pavement Protector'
Funny story:  Bad Breath Ends Senator Cruz's Marathon Speech - Listerine Stock Rises on News

Bad Breath Ends Senator Cruz's Marathon Speech - Listerine Stock Rises on News

The senate voted on Wednesday to terminate Senator Ted Cruz's (R-TX) marathon speech. For 21 hours and 19 minutes, Cruz leveled a verbal assault on President Obama's signature healthcare law. The unanimous vote came after Senators could no longer sta...
View 'Bad Breath Ends Senator Cruz's Marathon Speech - Listerine Stock Rises on News'
Funny story:  Congress to Recess until after 2016 Election - "Grand Bargain" Struck by Pelosi and Boehner

Congress to Recess until after 2016 Election - "Grand Bargain" Struck by Pelosi and Boehner

Special to TPN - Following a meeting described as "amicable," Rep. Nancy Pelosi (D-CA) and John Boehner (R-OH) announced that Congress will adjourn until after the 2016 election cycle. Pelosi opened a joint news conference by saying, "We both felt th...
View 'Congress to Recess until after 2016 Election - "Grand Bargain" Struck by Pelosi and Boehner'
Funny story:  Florida OKs Hand Grenades for "Stand-Your-Ground" Defense

Florida OKs Hand Grenades for "Stand-Your-Ground" Defense

Special to TPN - Florida Governor Rick Scott today signed into law an expansion of his state's controversial "Stand-Your-Ground" statute 776.013. Those with so-called "carry" permits for handguns will be allowed to conceal on their persons not more t...
View 'Florida OKs Hand Grenades for "Stand-Your-Ground" Defense'
Funny story:  Edward Snowden Elected Mayor of Dudinka, Siberia

Edward Snowden Elected Mayor of Dudinka, Siberia

Special to TPN - ITAR-TASS, the Russian news agency, announced that Edward J. Snowden, the former intelligence contractor on the run from the American authorities, has won the mayoralty race in Dudinka. Dudinka is the administrative center of Taymyrs...
View 'Edward Snowden Elected Mayor of Dudinka, Siberia'
Funny story:  Texas Prohibits Pet Neutering

Texas Prohibits Pet Neutering

Austin, Tex. - On Friday, the Texas Senate passed one of the strictest anti-abortion measures in the country. Gov. Rick Perry is expected to sign the bill after a Democratic filibuster blocked its passage last month. Buried in the bill is a provision...
View 'Texas Prohibits Pet Neutering'
Funny story:  Mutant Crabgrass Threatens Corn Crop

Mutant Crabgrass Threatens Corn Crop

Special to Spoof - Farmers in the Midwest have been plagued by a mutant strain of crabgrass that threatens to reduce the annual corn harvest by 50 percent or more in coming years. The species, Digitaria sanguinalis, is found throughout the world.
View 'Mutant Crabgrass Threatens Corn Crop'
Funny story:  Texas to Auction off WWII Bazookas

Texas to Auction off WWII Bazookas

Special to TP News - Republican Governor Rick Perry announced that 2,500 surplus World War II-era bazookas will be offered to the public in a special auction. These recoilless-rocket antitank weapons were used extensively against the Nazis during the...
View 'Texas to Auction off WWII Bazookas'
Funny story:  Vatican promotes Silly Hat Contest

Vatican promotes Silly Hat Contest

Special to TPN - Vatican Secretary of State, Cardinal Tarcisio Bertone, announced that the Convocation of Cardinals assembled to pick a new Pope will liven up the proceedings with a Silly-Hat Contest, which has not been conducted for 1200 years.
View 'Vatican promotes Silly Hat Contest'
Funny story:  Todd Akin To Build "Berghof West" in Missouri: Adolph Hitler's Residence Serves as Model

Todd Akin To Build "Berghof West" in Missouri: Adolph Hitler's Residence Serves as Model

Special to TPN - Rep. Todd Akin (R-MO) is building a new summer home atop Taum Sauk Mountain, the highest point in Missouri. Rep. Akin is known famously as the one who clarified the difference between "rape" and "legitimate rape." To his credit, he a...
View 'Todd Akin To Build "Berghof West" in Missouri: Adolph Hitler's Residence Serves as Model'
Funny story:  Dante's Circles of Hell to Be Augmented - Rep. Todd Akin (R-MO) develops initiative for Republican Party platform

Dante's Circles of Hell to Be Augmented - Rep. Todd Akin (R-MO) develops initiative for Republican Party platform

Special to TNP - At his daily news conference, Reince Priebus, chairman of the Republican National Committee (RNC), claimed that "a new version of Dante's Inferno is necessary to ensure the long-term health of the country. In fact, I anticipate that...
View 'Dante's Circles of Hell to Be Augmented - Rep. Todd Akin (R-MO) develops initiative for Republican Party platform'
Funny story:  Government to Test Cell-Phone Lanes on Interstates

Government to Test Cell-Phone Lanes on Interstates

Special to TPN - Chairman Deborah Hearseman of the National Transportation Safety Board (NTSB) announced that several major U.S. cities will test the practicality of constructing separate cell-phone lanes on interstate highways. The purpose of this...
View 'Government to Test Cell-Phone Lanes on Interstates'
Funny story:  "God Particle" Found To Be Mormon Messenger

"God Particle" Found To Be Mormon Messenger

Special to TP News - Physicists at the CERN Laboratory in Switzerland announced that the Higgs boson, the so-called "God particle," resembles the Mormon angel Moroni. Moroni is the keeper of the golden plates on which is inscribed the Book of Mormon.
View '"God Particle" Found To Be Mormon Messenger'
Funny story:  Supreme Court Justice Scalia Expands SCROTUM

Supreme Court Justice Scalia Expands SCROTUM

Special to TP News - Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia has decided to expand his fraternal organization, SCROTUM (Supreme Court Republican Organization to Uncover Moderates). SCROTUM was established by Scalia in 2011 to aid in the fight against li...
View 'Supreme Court Justice Scalia Expands SCROTUM'
Funny story:  Romney To Buy Wife Ann a Clothes Washer for Mother's Day

Romney To Buy Wife Ann a Clothes Washer for Mother's Day

Likely Teapublican presidential candidate Mitt Romney revealed that he will be purchasing a new clothes washer for wife Ann this week. "I think it's the ideal gift for a stay-at-home mom like Ann," said Romney during a break from the campaign trail.
View 'Romney To Buy Wife Ann a Clothes Washer for Mother's Day'

Showing page 1 (of 5 pages)
Breaking News...

National Institute of Abhorrent Behavior (NIAB) to Study Cable News Anchors

Boston-Dr. Felix Noodlesorter of NAIB received a LooneyToonery grant to study the behavioral traits of those who anchor cable news shows. Prime subject for scrutiny is Wacky Chris Matthews of MSNBC,

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Email:

What's 1 multiplied by 2?

1 14 25 2


Go to top ^