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Skimpy bikinis banned by butch Olympic lesbians

Funny story: Skimpy bikinis banned by butch Olympic lesbians

Women's beach volleyball players have been advised not to wear tight fitting bikinis at the 2012 London Olympics. Athletes in the event have worn skimpy swimwear since the sport was introduced at the 1996 Olympics in Atlanta. Now the change has b...

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QPR fans face moral dilemma over Chelsea game in Munich

Funny story: QPR fans face moral dilemma over Chelsea game in Munich

A football fan in Shepherd's Bush has been attacked by an angry mob after he was spotted strutting around West London in a Bayern Munich shirt. 'A huge crowd chased me, including members of the Anti-Nazi League. They tried to rip the shirt off my...

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QPR fly fans to the Algarve for mid-season break.

Funny story: QPR fly fans to the Algarve for mid-season break.

QPR have flown all of their fans to the Algarve for a week's holiday as they seek to make the most of a two-week break in fixtures. With no match this saturday, the club are using the opportunity to give 15,000 exhausted supporters a mid-season br...

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Liverpool apologise to Chelsea for Torres

Funny story: Liverpool apologise to Chelsea for Torres

Liverpool have described Fernando Torres' refusal to score for Chelsea as "unacceptable". Torres has since apologised for being unable to hit a cow's arse with a banjo, and admits he has let the club down. Liverpool's managing director, says th...

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Carry On Up The Capello.

Funny story: Carry On Up The Capello.

John Terry has paid tribute to Fabio Capello and expressed his personal regret at losing the England captaincy . "The eyetie stood down in protest at how the FA treated me. I expect everyone in the country to follow his example and resign from th...

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Anfield Cat in Twitter fight with Joey Barton.

Funny story: Anfield Cat in Twitter fight with Joey Barton.

The Attorney General is to investigate comments made by Joey Barton on Twitter during a heated debate with Anfield Cat. The scouse moggy became an internet sensation after running onto the pitch during last night's game between Liverpool and Spurs...

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John Terry given the Spanish Archer by fans

Funny story: John Terry given the Spanish Archer by fans

John Terry will be allowed to lead his country at Euro 2012 after his race-row court case was adjourned until July 9. In a statement, Judge Rupert Nonce said: "We haven't got time for the trial at the moment. The lads at Chelsea have some difficul...

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John Terry addresses nation on Twitter.

Funny story: John Terry addresses nation on Twitter.

John Terry has spoken to the people after his team cheated their way to victory against QPR in the FA Cup. Chelsea nicked a result in the match due to Daniel Sturridge stepping on a Second World War landmine in the Loftus Road penalty area after r...

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QPR refuse to bite Chelsea bullet.

Funny story: QPR refuse to bite Chelsea bullet.

Anton Ferdinand has been sent a recently fired bullet in the post, less than 24 hours before Queens Park Rangers' FA Cup tie against Chelsea. The Metropolitan Police confirmed that they had investigated a sinister package which...

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"An idiot is more cleverer than me" claims Harry Redknapp.

Funny story: "An idiot is more cleverer than me" claims Harry Redknapp.

The jury at Harry Redknapp's tax dodging trial have heard how the soccer boss writes like a two-year-old. The Spurs manager denied stashing dosh away and told cops: "You talk to anybody at the club, I can't write or spell. I couldn't even fill a t...

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QPR to sign Kaxo Mpewilmu.

Funny story: QPR to sign Kaxo Mpewilmu.

Sky Sports understands that QPR are in talks with Kaxo Mpewilmu. The 22 year old Belgian born Gambian wonderkid is currently plying his trade with FC Snagov in the Romanian 2nd tier. Mark Hughes has a reported £30 million warchest, and a high s...

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Rosie 47 stitches up Harry Redknapp.

Funny story: Rosie 47 stitches up Harry Redknapp.

Harry Redknapp was twitching like a pigeon today after it was revealed in court that his dog had opened a secret bank account in Monaco. The jury was told how the Old Bill had been following the trail of 'Arry's dog, who was operating under the mo...

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Joey Barton Twitter attack on Gary Glitter

Funny story: Joey Barton Twitter attack on Gary Glitter

A war of tweets has broken out after Joey Barton claimed a Twitter account belonging to pop paedophile Gary Glitter should be given a red card. @Joey7Barton called Gary Glitter a #wrongun and a #diddlediddler and said that the unverified account w...

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QPR to punish non-mourners and send them to North Korea.

Funny story: QPR to punish non-mourners and send them to North Korea.

The QPR authorities are to sentence anyone who has not participated in mourning sessions for deposed leader Neil Warnock to terms in North Korean labour camps, reported the Shepherd's Bush Gazette. The decision to hand out punishments of at least...

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QPR give silk purse to Mark Hughes.

Funny story: QPR give silk purse to Mark Hughes.

QPR have named Mark Hughes as their new boss after promising him up to £30 to spend on sheep. The Welshman has received assurances from the QPR board that they match his own ambition and are prepared to place a £20-30 war chest at his disposal, en...

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Cockneys tell more porkies than Scousers and Taffies

Funny story: Cockneys tell more porkies than Scousers and Taffies

Cockneys tell more lies than Scousers or Taffies, according to a local survey. The Londoners score an average of seven porkies a day, with Scousers achieving five and the hapless Taffies managing only four little fibs. Both the Cockneys polled...

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John Terry's face being used on Indian cigarette packets

Funny story: John Terry's face being used on Indian cigarette packets

Representatives of John Terry are taking legal advice after an image resembling the footballer appeared on cigarette packs in India. The photograph of a blurred head and pale torso appears above the words SMOKING CIGARETTES CAN LEAD TO BEING CAPTA...

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Taarabt and Chamakh to eat for Morocco in the Africa Cup.

Funny story: Taarabt and Chamakh to eat for Morocco in the Africa Cup.

Queens Park Rangers' Adel Taarabt and Arsenal's Marouane Chamakh are both included in Morocco's 23-man squad for the Africa Cup of Nations finals. Chamakh has been selected despite only managing to eat a tagine just once in eight starts for Arsena...

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Breaking news…

Wallis Simpson And Meghan Markle

Somewhere in heaven, Wallis Simpson is smiling and applauding Meghan Markle’s wedding to Prince Harry: an American, an actress and a divorcee. Wow! Everything else is just sparkle. Smart guy, Harry.
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