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10#8514#Bureau#41444.5388889#1#639535
Gov't crackdown continues in Turkey!
Armed police say they will quit water blasts and tear gas bombs and begin going straight after their giblets if they don't settle down.
10#8514#Bureau#41444.5366667#2#766637
Afghanistan: Nato Security Handover Marked by Deadly Blast
Afghan military Leader apologizes. "We eat a lot of fiber here."
10#8514#Bureau#41444.5344329#3#949630
BAKED ALASKA: Anchorage sets heat record!
Lifeguards report that huge blubber slick is starting to become a water hazard.
10#8514#Bureau#41444.5323611#4#610638
Hey-O! Taliban is ready for peace talks!
The Taliban in Afghanistan say they are finally ready for peace talks. "However, the first joker with that 'Mr. Taliban tally me banana' song and we're ready for a hundred more years of fighting."
10#8514#Bureau#41444.5289699#5#269034
POLL: Americans Don't Trust Newspapers, TV News
POLL: Majority of Americans Don't Trust Newspapers, TV News, Radio Talk Shows, Neighborhood Gossipers, Polls!
10#8514#Bureau#41444.5265625#6#815295
NPR Shows New Facility
NPR Shows Off New Facility: Wellness center, café, beehives on roof, free range chickens everywhere you looked. "Better watch where you sit" Presenter laughs.
10#8514#Bureau#41444.5240162#7#527808
Putin Pleased
Russian President Putin told the press that he thought his staring contest with President Obama went well. Putin spoke to reporters while riding a shark.
10#8514#Bureau#41444.5206134#8#951354
REPORT: IRS to pay $70 MILLION in employee bonuses
"They work hard for your money", says White House Spokesman. "I would have liked for it to have been more but there's all the eavesdropping equipment we had to purchase."
10#9766#Jaggedone#41444.31125#9#518062
Lady Gaga is in love!
With a figment of a complete and utter nutter's imagination!
10#8514#Bureau#41444.0609028#10#700086
Circus Circus
Crowds in Las Vegas astounded as clown folds ordinary dollar bill into poodle.
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