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Study Finds America is Second Most Violent Country

Funny story: Study Finds America is Second Most Violent Country

Washington, D.C. - America has fallen behind. No, not in education, healthcare or quality of life. The US is now the second most violent country in the world. So, who is the most violent? The answer is a bit surprising. Would you believe Luxembo...

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Sarah Palin Takes Aim at 2012

Funny story: Sarah Palin Takes Aim at 2012

Wasilla, AK - Former Alaska Governor Sarah Palin has her sights set on the White House. Palin announced today that she's running for President. "I'm going to take my shot," said Palin. She added, "Obama better watch out because I'm gunning for h...

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First Annual Dick Convention to be Held

Funny story: First Annual Dick Convention to be Held

Dallas - The Dicks are coming - thousands of them. Dallas will host the First Annual Dick Convention in June. "It's all about showing off our Dicks," said event spokesman Dick Heart. The convention will feature speeches from prominent Dick...

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John Boehner Opens Up

Funny story: John Boehner Opens Up

Washington, D.C. - House Speaker John Boehner wants everyone to know he's a regular guy. The Ohio Congressman enjoys movies and football. He loves his wife and dabbles in stamps. "I love postage," said Boehner. "Is there any better pairing than...

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Cupid to Replace Bow & Arrow with Shotgun

Funny story: Cupid to Replace Bow & Arrow with Shotgun

Rome - Love or else. That's the message Roman deity Cupid wants everyone to consider this Valentine's Day. The winged God is trading in his trademark bow and arrow for something more affective. "I can't hit s**t with a bow," Cupid admits. Poor...

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Woman Changes Political Beliefs After Reading Bumper Sticker

Funny story: Woman Changes Political Beliefs After Reading Bumper Sticker

Seattle, WA - Judith Rutledge is no longer a Democrat. The forty year old has been a liberal her entire life. Everything changed this morning when she pulled up behind a pickup truck. The truck was littered with bumper stickers, including several...

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New Research Confirms People With No Arms Give Lousy High Fives

Funny story: New Research Confirms People With No Arms Give Lousy High Fives

Cambridge, MA - Researchers at Harvard have published the results of an extensive ten year, one hundred million dollar study. The findings confirm long held beliefs. Turns out people with no arms cannot give a decent high five. Researchers stu...

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Local Man Looks Out Window - Gets The Weather Wrong

Funny story: Local Man Looks Out Window - Gets The Weather Wrong

Des Moines, IA - Insurance Salesman Walter Burns is under fire. Burns, an employee at National Insurance, was asked about the weather by a coworker. Burns looked out the window and reported what he saw. "It was sunny. The sun was out," said Bur...

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Tea Party Express Hits Woman With No Health Insurance

Funny story: Tea Party Express Hits Woman With No Health Insurance

Washington, DC - The revolution…is in the impound yard. Irony, life's version of baking chocolate, has put the brakes on the Tea Party Express. The giant RV used to carry hordes of angry white people collided with a pedestrian yesterday. Capitol...

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The Swayze Effect Grips World

Funny story: The Swayze Effect Grips World

Catskill Mountains, New York - Strange behavior has gripped the globe following the death of Patrick Swayze. The actor who was best known for his roles in the films "Ghost" and "Dirty Dancing" died this week after a long battle with pancreatic cance...

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Harry Potter To Search For Kanye West's Horcruxes

Funny story: Harry Potter To Search For Kanye West's Horcruxes

Atlanta, Georgia - Embattled singer Kanye West will never die - ever. The world's number one egomaniac has split his soul into a million pieces. Lord Voldemort is the only other person known to have achieved this feet. An advanced understanding...

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Rep. Joe Wilson's Long History Of Random Yelling

Funny story: Rep. Joe Wilson's Long History Of Random Yelling

Washington, DC - The Beatles - rock & roll legends, voice of a generation, liars. "I remember Joe screaming at his record player," said John Hill a longtime friend of South Carolina Congressman Joe Wilson. Hill explains Wilson was upset by John...

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Two Men Get In Fight Over Who Is The World's Greatest Dad

Funny story: Two Men Get In Fight Over Who Is The World's Greatest Dad

Reno, Nevada - What makes a great dad? There are a number of answers; chances are none of them involve beating another man senseless in front of a playground full of six-year-olds. Dale Jacoby and Roger Thorne are in jail this morning. The two...

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Schwarzenegger Challenges Mother Nature To A Fight

Funny story: Schwarzenegger Challenges Mother Nature To A Fight

Sacramento, CA - California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger has had enough. "Wildfires, earthquakes, drought, floods, swine flu, Michael Jackson - no more! Mother Nature must be terminated." Schwarzenegger's remarks come as the state recovers fro...

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Big Bird Assaulted While Walking Down Sesame Street

Funny story: Big Bird Assaulted While Walking Down Sesame Street

New York - Everyone's favorite giant yellow bird is a little black and blue this morning. Big Bird was attacked Saturday night as he returned to his home on Sesame Street. Police reports indicate the attackers were after Bird's childlike innoce...

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"American Gothic" a Communist Work of Art

Funny story: "American Gothic" a Communist Work of Art

Chicago - What started as a trickle has turned into a flood. Americans are adrift in a sea of Communist art. "Our purple mountains are being eroded by red waves," said Joe Smith. Smith says he became aware of the Communist plot to destroy America...

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Chicken Little Pissed At Glenn Beck

Funny story: Chicken Little Pissed At Glenn Beck

Louisville, KY - Freaking people out used to be her domain. "The irrational, angry mob always came to me," said Chicken Little. "Now they've got internet and that G**damn Glenn Beck. No one can hear my clucking over his temper tantrums." Little...

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PETA Warns of Piñata Violence

Funny story: PETA Warns of Piñata Violence

Norfolk, VA - Birthday parties are more than just cake and ice cream. To some they're celebrations of animal cruelty. "Pin the tail on the donkey, animal shaped piñatas. Where you hear laughter I hear screaming - we're teaching children that it's...

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Name Calling Trump

One thing about Trump, no one will ever call him simpatico!
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