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Funny satire stories about umbrella

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British Woman Impaled on US Beach

Funny story: British Woman Impaled on US Beach

A British woman was left in spasms of ecstasy on a beach at Seaside Heights in Ocean County, New Jersey, today when a freak accident caused an umbrella to impale her. Velvet Cunningham was innocently sunbathing in a two piece bikini when the beach...

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Pensioner beats the crap out of jewelry thieves with an umbrella!

Funny story: Pensioner beats the crap out of jewelry thieves with an umbrella!

Mayfair, London, yesterday: A bunch of moronic thieves attempted to break into a jewelry shop wielding sledge hammers, knives and anything else they could get their hands on. Then, after arriving on scooters, the latest trend in armed robbery in L...

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Rihanna Confesses She Hopes Chris Brown Goes To Prison Forever

Funny story: Rihanna Confesses She Hopes Chris Brown Goes To Prison Forever

NEW YORK CITY - Rihanna was in the Big Apple visiting one of her childhood friends when she was asked about her ex-boyfriend Chris Brown. Her expression changed from one of happiness and contentment to one of bitterness and anger. She said that...

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Robin hood takes over as manager at Nottingham Forest!

Funny story: Robin hood takes over as manager at Nottingham Forest!

After Steve McCLaren resigned to the fact that he would not be raising his umbrella in Nottingham because it never rains there it just pours, a surprise candidate entered the ring to take over; Robin Hood. Robin is an expert at taking from the ric...

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Shield of Umbrellas Gets Go Ahead

Funny story: Shield of Umbrellas Gets Go Ahead

Twenty eight umbrellas will be providing protection for Nato countries as a shield against attack from disgruntled students, angry former civil servants and the Unite Union. The trifling cost of this defensive shield will be $270 million. Downing...

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OAP In Bus Stop Bust Up

Funny story: OAP In Bus Stop Bust Up

For resident Heavington OAP Mollie McGarrigle, what should have been a routine trip to the post office to collect her pension and a trip to the butcher's for a ham shank and a neck of lamb turned into a nightmare as she went to catch the bus back to...

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Rihanna loses umbrella on London bus - Police appealing for information

Funny story: Rihanna loses umbrella on London bus - Police appealing for information

London - Police are appealing to the public for any information concerning the loss of singer Rihanna's 58 carat gold umbrella, which she accidentally left on a London Metroline Bus Route 98 Holborn to Willesden Bus Garage. The incident happened at...

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Breaking news…

Sales blames ring for illness

Boston Red Sox baseball player "Lefty" Sales said his cock ring made him sick. "It turned my penis green," he said. "My girlfriend paid for gold, but obviously, the jeweler sold her brass."
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