Funny satire stories about traffic light

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A666 - The A-road of The Beast

According to an extensive study by AD Surveys, 80% of drivers who use the A666 in Bolton are utter fuckwits who think traffic lights and box junctions are there for decoration. An unnamed spokesman said today. "The next time someone stops on the...

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Excitement in Norwegian Rubbestadneset

Inhabitants of the Norwegian town Rubbestadneset had an exciting moment today as the local traffic light on a crossroad suddenly started working. This light usually remains off due to the low amount of traffic going past the crossroad. Today howev...

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Evolutionary Algorithms for Traffic Lights

Funny story: Evolutionary Algorithms for Traffic Lights

Evolutionary based traffic lights will be rolled out across London after a successful trial in Chipping Norton. The new lights take in information from road sensors, traffic monitors and each other to constantly tweak the priorities and patterns o...

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Isle of Wight News - Traffic lights to be automated

Funny story: Isle of Wight News - Traffic lights to be automated

The budget cuts sweeping the UK are not leaving the Isle of Wight out, with the Island council asked to trim their budget by twenty percent, or nearly five hundred pounds. One of the more tragic cuts is the enforced early retirement of Frank Excha...

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Isle of Wight News - Traffic Chaos

Funny story: Isle of Wight News - Traffic Chaos

The main traffic lights on the A3020, St Georges Way in the centre of Newport were out of action for three hours on Monday morning, right in the middle of rush hour. As the traffic lights cycled endlessly between red, amber and green, the local shop owners and residents were out in force to watch them. Such was the ensuing chaos, it took the police nearly forty minutes to get to the scene and s...

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San Francisco Mayor to Phase Out Traffic Signals

Funny story: San Francisco Mayor to Phase Out Traffic Signals

SAN FRANCISCO, California - Mayor Gavin Newsom gave the green light today to a controversial new initiative aimed at driving down the city of San Francisco's gaping budget deficit. Beginning January 1, 2010, he announced, maintenance crews will be...

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Road Safety Campaign

Funny story: Road Safety Campaign

In a multi-billion pound effort to reduce unemployment and put an end to road rage, the UK Government has decided to implement changes on British roads. "After a six year study," said Jacqui Smith, the Home Secretary, "we have determined the major...

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Cycle Paths or Psychopaths?

Funny story: Cycle Paths or Psychopaths?

Riding on pavements and not stopping at traffic lights when showing red to allow pedestrians to cross will no longer 'be optional' for Cyclists from 2009.

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What do YOU do at a Traffic Light?

Funny story: What do YOU do at a Traffic Light?

Two cameras mounted above an intersection record the goings on inside cars while people wait for the light to change. The new study on "Intermittant regularly scheduled traffic flow disruption behaviors" shows people take advantage of thos...

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