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Funny story: Deadly pong closes Thames foot tunnel

Deadly pong closes Thames foot tunnel

London - A pair of vintage trainers missing since the Olympic Marathon are in the frame for last night's Greenwich foot tunnel closure. Dave Snargs and fellow running coach Alf Rancid are suspected of causing the stink that shut the Thames underpa...
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Funny story: Heatwave turns Princess Diana Fountain into toxic soup

Heatwave turns Princess Diana Fountain into toxic soup

London - "Smells like lobster gumbo during advanced putrefaction," worried Royal Parks Agency sources admitted today. By lunchtime hundreds of London sunbathers had been taken in droves to A&E as noxious fumes continued to spew from the tragic...
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Funny story: Scientists find sugar to be a bio-warfare agent

Scientists find sugar to be a bio-warfare agent

Bethesda Maryland - Sugar is not just toxic, as some have recently postulated; but Dr. Guerivarewus, who works in a secret lab, has proven that it is a bio-warfare agent designed to kill all animal life on Earth. As Dr. Guerivarewus has shown, pla...
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Funny story: Nation's Toxic Assets to be Stored at Nuclear Waste Facility

Nation's Toxic Assets to be Stored at Nuclear Waste Facility

President Obama announced today that the nation's toxic assets will be stored at Yucca Mountain Repository, to remain undisturbed for tens of thousand of years. "It is hoped," Obama said, "That by that time somebody will have developed the ways and m...
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Funny story: Brown: Toxic assets taste 'great'

Brown: Toxic assets taste 'great'

The government is set to buy up toxic assets from UK banks and sell them to the public as confectionery. Treasury sources close to the deal explained uncertainty in the markets had created unease over any mortgage-backed assets - but most were pro...
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Funny story: K-Fed & Justin Timberlake to release Britney Spears tribute album

K-Fed & Justin Timberlake to release Britney Spears tribute album

Troubled pop sensation Britney Spears was buoyed by news of plans to release a tribute album of her work featuring ex-partners Justin Timberlake and Kevin Federline, aka K-Fed.
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Funny story: Faster U.S. Mail for Some

Faster U.S. Mail for Some

Playing off the anticipated success of the "Registered Traveler" program, and owing to a dramatic post-911 increase in amount of mail that must be screened for explosives and toxic substances, U.S. Postal Authorities today announced the adv...
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Breaking News...

Style Maven/Ex-Con Stewart Announces Her Latest For the Holiday

Stewart today touted her rollout of MarthaGoblers--designer turkeys for the Thanksgiving feast. MarthaGoblers are available in various skin-tone shades from Titian Brown to Chirascuro Noir and Blanc
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