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Funny satire stories about stimulus plan

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Pelosi Seeks Inspiration from a Bush

Funny story: Pelosi Seeks Inspiration from a Bush

This week CNS News reported that the government spent nearly a quarter of a million dollars to "translocate" a single bush that stood in the way of a $1 billion highway improvement near San Franscisco. The plant, a rare "in-the-wild" Arctostaphyl...

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Stinky Feet Causes Climate Change

Funny story: Stinky Feet Causes Climate Change

Washington DC: A new Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) study apologizes for the federal government's junk science blaming Carbon Dioxide (CO2) for causing climate change. The real culprit is stinky feet. The EPA was examining regulating the o...

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The Great British Olympics

Funny story: The Great British Olympics

David Cameron has been outlining what will make the London 2012 Olympics the best that has ever been. "The London Olympics are a true British enterprise," said Cameron. "We bid for them several years ago with the intention of stimulating the econo...

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Do-It-Yourself Dollars program created to stimulate the US economy

Funny story: Do-It-Yourself Dollars program created to stimulate the US economy

Washington, DC -- The US Treasury Department is introducing a program designed to stimulate the US economy from the bottom up. Called "Do-It-Yourself Dollars," the effort provides software American taxpayers can use to print their own cash. "Now,...

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Obama Has Created 100,740,000,000 Hand Jobs Since Taking Office

Funny story: Obama Has Created 100,740,000,000 Hand Jobs Since Taking Office

President Barrack Obama is taking credit for creating 100 billion, 740 million hand jobs since taking office. "That's three times the number of hand jobs created under the past three presidents combined, and more than double the amount of hand jobs c...

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Anal Seepage Voted "Least Favorite Thing To Find In A Chair"

Funny story: Anal Seepage Voted "Least Favorite Thing To Find In A Chair"

In a poll conducted by The Harvard Institute of Silly Surveys That Waste Government Money But Provide Work For Tenured Professors, Lazy Students and ACORN Workers, Anal Seepage was voted "The Least Favorite Thing To Find In A Chair." The study fo...

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New - more exciting interesections planned for US highways

Funny story: New - more exciting interesections planned for US highways

Denver Colorado - UPDATE 1 Google has announced that it is ready to test its cars on the new intersections, but wishes to do so without humans on board. Government spokesman Mr. Phil Resastum of NAAATT (National American Automotive Association...

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Democrats Urge Obama to Deliver Bigger Stimulus Package

Funny story: Democrats Urge Obama to Deliver Bigger Stimulus Package

Democrats are urging that the President send every American family $1,000 in another effort to stimulate the economy. "The $250 we sent out before wasn't enough to get people spending once again", stated Barney Frank. "Now Americans are beginning...

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Election Attack Ad Spending Provided Major Economic Stimulus

Funny story: Election Attack Ad Spending Provided Major Economic Stimulus

Negative campaign advertising during the recent midterm elections injected $800 billion into the American economy. "The combination of a glut of billionaires, low taxes on billionaires, and a Supreme Court decision allowing anonymous campaign spen...

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Government Funds Doctoral Dissertation Study That Discovers Men Like Women's Breasts

A doctoral dissertation funded by the Federal Government as part of the Stimulus Package has discovered that men like women's breasts. Dr. Howard Dickwillie of the Nowhere Institute of Technology and Fertilizer Sciences, in an eighteen month stu...

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President Obama Announces $376 Million Stimulus

Funny story: President Obama Announces $376 Million Stimulus

Renovations have begun on the electrical wiring and plumbing of the White House, adding up to somewhere along the lines of $376 million. On-site construction administrators say the nearly century-old infrastructure is dangerous, but some are question...

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Obama's 'don't call it a package' stimulus plan

Funny story: Obama's 'don't call it a package' stimulus plan

WASHINGTON, DC - Senior aide to President Obama, David Plouffe, warned Congressional Democrats to avoid the use of the word "package" when talking about stimulus "plans". He said that "package" can have negative connotations, especially if an Afri...

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President Unveils New Stimulus Plan That is Twice As Good As Last One

Funny story: President Unveils New Stimulus Plan That is Twice As Good As Last One

WASHINGTON, DC - President Obama released his new Advanced Stimulus System (ASS), that he touts as "twice as good as the last plan". Although the details of the plan won't be released until next week, he outlined the cost and the benefits: "Wh...

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Run on Kabul Bank Causes Panic: Obama Pledges to "Plug That Hole" with Big Stimulus!

Funny story: Run on Kabul Bank Causes Panic: Obama Pledges to "Plug That Hole" with Big Stimulus!

Afghan politicians, drug lords, Taliban Chieftains, CIA informants and Al Qaeda fighters all stood in line today as the run on the Bank of Kabul extended into a second day prompting the major stockholder to call on the US for 'just another little bai...

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Stimulus Dollars At Work

Funny story: Stimulus Dollars At Work

The Federal Government is hiring at a record pace. Initially that might seem a good thing in this distressed economy but it brings along some negative baggage. Specifically, these new hires are often not fully trained in the subtleties and nuances of public service. To that end the Office of Employment and Budget has began teaching classes for these recruits at various locations throughout the...

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The Progress Report: Obama's Stimulus Package

Experts from several universities as well as all major new organizations have reported today that the $787 billion stimulus package has disappeared without a trace. Several government agencies including the FBI, IRS, Federal Reserve as well as the 53...

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Stimulus Report - Major Growth in Undocumented Jobs

Funny story: Stimulus Report - Major Growth in Undocumented Jobs

NEW YORK, NY - Although the effective distribution of credit to private sector employers is below targeted levels, entertainment and personal gratification markets are seeing improvement. Entrepreneurs such as Candy, Cristal, and Honey L'Amor are exp...

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Obama says stimulus plan is 'not working'

Funny story: Obama says stimulus plan is 'not working'

WASHINGTON DC - President Obama today held a short informal press conference with a few lessor known reporters. He chose this venue, in his office, to make a lucid revelation of the solution to all economic problems. Follows his statement. The s...

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Breaking news…

The Only Way to Get the Palestinians to the Table

Our Middle East correspondent M. Voltaire opines: If you want PLO/Hamas to come to the Peace Table, set out copious quantities of rancid cheese --it's the only enticing incentive for street rats.
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