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Funny satire stories about spending cuts

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Funny story:  Spending cats force sale of Lord Mayor's mansion

Spending cats force sale of Lord Mayor's mansion

The Lord Mayor of Mansfield has had to put his mansion on the market, after running out of money. He initially blamed his wife for running up massive debts. But she blamed their 25 cats. "We've got one Persian and a few Moggies, but most of them a...
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Funny story:  Great Britain PLC on a new high - unofficially leaked information!

Great Britain PLC on a new high - unofficially leaked information!

"The UK is on so many highs at the moment, so we should not be putting down these record breaking efforts created by the Coalition Government". The claim comes from the Chancellor of the Exchequer's second secretary's assistant filing clerk's part...
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Funny story:  Nick Clegg: Carlos Tevez right to refuse to play

Nick Clegg: Carlos Tevez right to refuse to play

Nick Clegg has shocked football fans by speaking out in impassioned defence of Carlos Tevez' refusal to come on as a substitute for Manchester City during last night's Champions League game against Bayern Munich. "Look," said Clegg in a specially...
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Funny story:  Captain Mainwairing:

Captain Mainwairing: "Dad's Army Territorials to be expanded, to make up for cuts to regular soldiers."

Walmington-On-Sea, East Coast, England: Some of the British population may be surprised to learn that in one part of England, martial law is still in place. Captain Mainwairing is still in charge, still believing an imminent invasion of the Nazi hordes is on the cards. Now that Liam Fox, the Defence Secretary, has announced the Army will be cut by a fifth from its current size of 102,000 to ar...
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Funny story:  Anger As Government Suggest Revamp Of Dogging Sites Across The UK

Anger As Government Suggest Revamp Of Dogging Sites Across The UK

In a move that has angered local citizens the length and breadth of the country, government ministers have put forward plans to revamp over thirty dogging sites across the UK. Whilst thousands of healthcare, childcare and other high profile servic...
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Funny story:  Osbourne uses example of Iggy Pop to defend cuts

Osbourne uses example of Iggy Pop to defend cuts

George Osbourne has used the sad example of punk-rock god Iggy Pop in order to defend massive government cuts in public spending. Pop, a hugely sucessful singer/songwriter fell on hard times in the late noughties due to his irresponsible spending habits and penchant for gambling huges swathes of money on internet bumfights. 'Whilst I'm not the biggest fan of his "music" myself' Osbourne told...
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Funny story:  Middle Classes Under Threat

Middle Classes Under Threat

Justice Secretary Kenneth Clarke has warned that the middle classes are largely unaware of the effect government spending cuts will have on their lives. Clarke feels in particular that Middle England will be particularly hit by the scale of upheav...
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Funny story:  The guy who should be in the headlines but the page isn't wide enough

The guy who should be in the headlines but the page isn't wide enough

As he sits with his Bob the Builder Advent Calender, the Right Honourable Eric Pickles, MP, Local Government Secretary, fantasises about the treats to come. The Tories do not call him the "Big Man" without reason. He is big, very big. As he ponder...
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Funny story:  Defence Cuts: Defending The Indefensible

Defence Cuts: Defending The Indefensible

A naval authority has sprung to the defence of the Goverment cuts in military spending. We reported last week that maritime affairs expert Rear Admiral Morton Vulgar-Fraction, RN (Retd) was horrified at the cuts which would see no jet aircraft tak...
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Funny story:  UK scupper the Ark Royal and reincarnate Dads Army!

UK scupper the Ark Royal and reincarnate Dads Army!

Cuts, cuts and more cuts have forced the "Dynamic Duo" into making many radical budget decisions and one of the worst hit areas is the military. David Cameron announced the cuts in front of bewildered opposition MP's today and here are the main po...
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Funny story:  Rangers CEO Bain - Battle lost but war still on

Rangers CEO Bain - Battle lost but war still on

Angry Rangers supremo Martin Bain last night vowed to fight the proposed Government spending cuts as he prepared to go to war with the SFA. The raging chief executive is angry that the Ark Royal is to be scrapped as he planned to launch strategic...
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Funny story:  London Kiddies Plan Toddle On Whitehall Over Playground Cuts

London Kiddies Plan Toddle On Whitehall Over Playground Cuts

Hundreds of London's youngsters are planning a mass toddle in protest at spending cuts which threaten the future of the capital's adventure playgrounds. Borough councils in the Greater London area say playgrounds will have to close if no Governmen...
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Funny story:  Vince Cable Unveils Science Spending Cuts Plan

Vince Cable Unveils Science Spending Cuts Plan

The coalition government's Business Secretary Vince Cable has unveiled a miraculous plan for a squeeze on public funding for scientific research, which will completely eradicate the need for ANY cash: don't do scientific research. He urged univers...
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Breaking News...

National Institute of Abhorrent Behavior (NIAB) to Study Cable News Anchors

Boston-Dr. Felix Noodlesorter of NAIB received a LooneyToonery grant to study the behavioral traits of those who anchor cable news shows. Prime subject for scrutiny is Wacky Chris Matthews of MSNBC,

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