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Funny satire stories about speed cameras

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E.U. Welsh Speed Trap Satellite Launched by Giant Soyuz Rocket

The first of a series of hyperlinked geostationary Welsh speed traps was positioned by a Russian Soyuz Rocket yesterday. The "Sentinel" global orbit Police radar speed cameras will supplement the sneaky Welsh Speed traps which provide most people's...

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How They Work: Speed Cameras

Funny story: How They Work: Speed Cameras

We have all got used to seeing those speed camera boxes at the side of the road, but until a speeding fine arrives in the post, does anyone wonder "How They Work"? I asked a policeman, and he said he was not completely sure but thought this was how they worked. Because there is no way of actually knowing how fast the cars are going until they have gone past, a clever probability system is used...

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Speed Limit to be removed from Motorway Toll Roads

Funny story: Speed Limit to be removed from Motorway Toll Roads

Motorway toll roads, such as the one opened to relieve congestion around Birmingham, and to save motorists from the ignominy of having to drive through Birmingham, are to have speed limits removed from January next year. "There are several reasons...

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Gatso Nuns Nab Demon Cyclist

Funny story: Gatso Nuns Nab Demon Cyclist

The nuns of a convent in Hemel Hempstead have taken the law into their own hands to catch a dangerous bike rider that they claim is possessed by the Devil. They used a Mini-Gatso radar gun to record the speed of the maniac cyclist and then reported...

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IDIOT Tips Her Hat to Idiotic States Actually Considering Getting Rid of Speed Cameras!

Funny story: IDIOT Tips Her Hat to Idiotic States Actually Considering Getting Rid of Speed Cameras!

Never mind the saved lives. Never mind the safer road conditions. But do mind the extra revenue, since it is not enough. That is what many lawmakers are saying about the "success" of speed cameras on our nation's roadways. Well I say absolute...

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A pedestrian is knocked down every 5 minutes on UK roads

Funny story: A pedestrian is knocked down every 5 minutes on UK roads

Research has today revealed that roads in the UK are equally as dangerous as the extremely dangerous UK drivers who use them. Despite the deployment of revenue cameras every 100 metres on open roads, a pedestrian is still knocked down every five m...

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New Speed Limits Introduced

Funny story: New Speed Limits Introduced

A new Road Safety campaign has been launched by the Government today, with the stated aim of jointly reducing both the accident rate and offsetting rising unemployment. Following the success of the Government's Think!! speed-reduction campaign and...

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Government sued over misleading speed camera signs

Funny story: Government sued over misleading speed camera signs

Trading standards have successfully sued the government over misleading speed camera signs. Speeder John Wilson contacted trading standards to complain that the cameras used by police are nothing like the ones shown on the signs. The high court j...

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Jeremy Clarkson Tells Drivers "Get To Swindon!"

Funny story: Jeremy Clarkson Tells Drivers "Get To Swindon!"

That wanker, Jeremy Clarkson, is at it again! The Top Gear host has reacted to the news that Swindon Council are to remove Speed Cameras on the town's roads by advising members of his viewing audience to: "Get down to Wiltshire! The cameras are down!...

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Traffic Cameras Too Expensive Let Peeping Ted Do It

Funny story: Traffic Cameras Too Expensive Let Peeping Ted Do It

Expert economics professor Elmereesha Eelsniffer at Stanford University in California just finished a study. So says a flying chimp that nearly broke the windshield of my car on the way into OZ today. The study was an economical feasibility study to...

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First ever speed camera that attempts to actually reduce speed is to be installed outside Leeds

Funny story: First ever speed camera that attempts to actually reduce speed is to be installed outside Leeds

In what is seen as a revolutionary breakthrough by any council in the country, Leeds is to install a road-side speed camera in an attempt to actually reduce drivers' speed at an accident blackspot outside the city.

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