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Funny satire stories about sloth

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Funny story:  Avram Grant Gets His Hammers In A Twist

Avram Grant Gets His Hammers In A Twist

Avram Grant was last night embroiled in a legal battle the likes of which this country has never seen. After West Ham's owner's David Short-And-Stubby and David Albino-Malnourished-Lion-Face made clear to Grant that his tenure had come to an end,...
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Funny story:  Testimony Begins in Sloth Assault Trial

Testimony Begins in Sloth Assault Trial

Temple, Tx: A jury of seven men and five women are listening to eyewitness testimony in the trial of impatient businessman Ron Martin, who nailed 90 year old Doris Sloth with a bag of frozen okra after she took twenty minutes writing a check to pay f...
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Funny story:  Bald Eagles Select Humans As National Primate of the United States

Bald Eagles Select Humans As National Primate of the United States

AP Newsliar -- After a lengthy selection process, Bald Eagles have chosen humans to be the national primate of the United States.
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Funny story:  The Secret of Longevity

The Secret of Longevity

Since the beginning of time man has been studying ways to live longer. The cave people did this by simply observing that those who got in the path of a Giant Sloth tended not to live as long as those who didn't. Thus they extended their overall population life span by practicing sloth-avoidance. There was Ponce de Leon and his frustrated search for the fountain of youth. He missed...
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True Facts From Snoops #1345

When alarmed, Oprah Winfrey can swell up to five times her normal size. She was taught this by Dr. Oz.

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