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Brighton Pier won't be charged with sex offences

Funny story: Brighton Pier won't be charged with sex offences

Brighton, West Sussex - Despite sackfuls of evidence of what really went on in the back of its dodgem bumper cars the UK's premier pleasure pier will not be charged with decades of kiddy-fiddling. This morning Crown Prosecutors admitted they'd bl...

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Bus Nutjobs Becoming Rare - Advertising Campaign Launched To Recruit More

Funny story: Bus Nutjobs Becoming Rare - Advertising Campaign Launched To Recruit More

A survey among bus passengers has revealed that only one in every fifty buses now has a regular "fruitcake" passenger. Bus companies have placed full page advertisements in all the major newspapers to try to recruit and train new applicants. The surv...

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Japanese Premier Burned By Pants On Fire

Funny story: Japanese Premier Burned By Pants On Fire

Yesterday, Prime Minister of Japan, Shinzo Abe, paid his "deepest respects" to the war dead at a Shinto shrine in Tokyo. The shrine honors, among others, Class A war criminals from World War II. Some were executed after the war because they committe...

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Apathetic Sex Offenders Gleeful at the Prospect of a New Challenge

Funny story: Apathetic Sex Offenders Gleeful at the Prospect of a New Challenge

Sex offenders who have lost their appetite for crime are to be given a new zeal for acts of a heinous nature thanks to some soon to be released products known as Anti Rape Underwear. AR Wear, the company behind the products, will see prototypes ro...

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Newsnight exposes famous BBC children's entertainer as yet another pervert!

Just when we thought the BBC sex crimes scandal could get no worse Newsnight have exposed another major BBC star. The most startling claim of abuse in the programme appeared to come from a female known only as Soo; who claimed to have been abused by...

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Castration of German sex offenders is degrading say the CPT (Maybe their victims think differently)!

Funny story: Castration of German sex offenders is degrading say the CPT (Maybe their victims think differently)!

The European Committee for the Prevention of Torture and Inhuman or Degrading Treatment or Punishment (CPT) have called castration for sex-offenders degrading and the process should be forbidden. Although castration happens rarely because most sex...

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Controversial Game show 'Second Chance' to air in October

Funny story: Controversial Game show 'Second Chance' to air in October

Everyone deserves a second chance...or do they? This is the premise of a controversial new reality show to air in the autumn. The show's contestants are made up of a group of social pariahs who, most would agree are beyond the pale, and many would be...

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Navy Corpsman Confirms: Bin Laden Burial Bath First He Had in Years!

Funny story: Navy Corpsman Confirms: Bin Laden Burial Bath First He Had in Years!

A retired Marine Corpsman confirmed what is now seeping out on the internet, that Osama Bin Laden was a very 'dirty' fifty-four year old Terrorist who refused to shower, terrorized women and was addicted to Porn! Confirming the charges is a new bo...

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Tiger Woods Tweets: "I Can't get It Up and Down Anymore!"

Funny story: Tiger Woods Tweets: "I Can't get It Up and Down Anymore!"

The golf world was in shock today as the latest Tweet from Tiger Woods seems to indicate his days as the World's most feared golfer are over! Tweeting from his River to Ocean palatial compound in South Florida, a morose Tiger admitted his skills...

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Some wedding VIPs are on the sex offenders register Palace admits

Funny story: Some wedding VIPs are on the sex offenders register Palace admits

London - A motley crew of perverts, pimps, assorted molesters, sheep-shaggers and not-so-closet Nazis will be sitting in the Abbey front row on Friday. And up to 100 hold hyper-super-dooper injunction gagging orders issued by Mr Justice Omerta in...

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A Top Canadian Miltary Man Erased From the Face of the Earth MOSTLY true story

Funny story: A Top Canadian Miltary Man Erased From the Face of the Earth MOSTLY true story

A top Canadian Military man has been erased as only the Canadians know how to do. This despicable person was allowed to wear his uniform by day, command troops and pick up a huge pay check whilst sexually assaulting and even killing women, by ni...

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Man Enters Sweepstakes, Winds Up On Sex Offender Registry

Funny story: Man Enters Sweepstakes, Winds Up On Sex Offender Registry

November 27, 2009- Local resident Jim Donahue was shocked to discover that he had been added to the National Sex Offender Registry after he entered a popular magazine sweepstakes Saturday. "I was picking which magazines I wanted to subscribe to an...

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FSA astonish financial world with new anouncement

Funny story: FSA astonish financial world with new anouncement

UK Financial Regulator the FSA, has rocked the financial world today, announcing a bizarre new recruitment policy. FSA spokes-person Grenville Mann-Gland, society louche and inveterate cottager announced today from FSA HQ or Shit Towers as it has...

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Homeless Sex Offenders Live in Tents North of Atlanta

Funny story: Homeless Sex Offenders Live in Tents North of Atlanta

COBB COUNTY, GA (ABSNN) - Approximately one dozen convicted sex offenders who have been released from prison on parole, are being forced to live out in the woods north of Atlanta, Georgia due to the nation's most restrictive laws governing where sex...

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Unlicensed Car Abused by repeat offender

A Vulcanised tyre-obsessed pervert who harassed a group of parked motor vehicles using social parking meter attendant ploys learned from websites has been described as "sexually deviant" and exiled from Asia A polished bonneted-obsessed pervert wh...

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Jonathan Ross asks for chemical castration

Funny story: Jonathan Ross asks for chemical castration

Falkirk - (Lurid Ass Mess): Serial sex predator Jonathan Ross - also known as Jonathan Bermingham according to police - has asked to be chemically castrated rather than endure 'years of pointless penis psychotherapy' and social workers' mumbo-jumbo.

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Sex Offenders to have Knackers Smacked with Wooden Gavel

Funny story: Sex Offenders to have Knackers Smacked with Wooden Gavel

In the first of several attempts to gain the high ground on Law and Order issues, a Conservative Think Tank has suggested that rather than send sex offenders to jail, the result of which they claim, is high cost to the taxpayer with dubious correctiv...

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French Catholic Communities Made to Sign New Child Abuse Register

Funny story: French Catholic Communities Made to Sign New Child Abuse Register

The Fifth Republic of France is to adopt a controversial policy regarding child abuse in the country. As from January 2009 the senior (or oldest) Roman Catholic male in all catholic communities has to sign a National Child Abuse Register on behalf...

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