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Rosie and Dim - On the Roseanne Barr Fallout

TV creature Rosanne Barr has blamed a series of racist Tweets on a sedative she had been taking. As we wait for the judge to come back from recess in our trial (completely trumped up charges of multi million pound embezzlement, we can’t even spell embezzlement without auto correct) we had a look at what other celebrities blamed shit behaviour on. Tommy Robinson: Recently incarcerated racist pat...

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The Onion To Change To Become More Like The Spoof

Funny story: The Onion To Change To Become More Like The Spoof

The Onion, the satirical news website par excellence, whose writers are the undisputed high-watermark of satirical literary output, is to make changes to become more like one of its rivals, TheSpoof.com. The Onion has been producing highly-crafted...

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Corbyn's Anti-Semitism Row Explodes

Funny story: Corbyn's Anti-Semitism Row Explodes

Jeremy Corbyn was today criticised for not praising the Israeli Government for killing unarmed demonstrators at the Gaza/Israel border. 'This is a clear case of blatant anti-semitism' declared 20 Labour MP's who demanded that Corbyn should resign.

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Trump’s face on a hot cross bun cured my dandruff: Woman’s shock claim

Funny story: Trump’s face on a hot cross bun cured my dandruff: Woman’s shock claim

A 47-year-old woman has made the astonishing claim that her chronic dandruff, which has plagued her since early childhood, has now completely cleared up, due, to what she believes to be, the miraculous healing powers of a likeness of US President, Do...

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In America All Politicians Know How To Put On The Sad Face When They Offer Their "Thoughts And Prayers" After A Mass Shooting.

Funny story: In America All Politicians Know How To Put On The Sad Face When They Offer Their "Thoughts And Prayers" After A Mass Shooting.

The long overused but handy expression used by countless soulless politicians and supposed sympathizers when trying to gloss over a tragedy so that they could get back to their money making and power grabbing duties has run its course. The public at...

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Witch Uses Gluten Free House to Entrap Children

Funny story: Witch Uses Gluten Free House to Entrap Children

Her walkway is lined with sugarless candy canes and her lawn is covered over with gluten free danishes. With the sides of her house made of non trans fat chicken fingers, a roof full of diet doughnuts and windows of sugarless sugar, the dimwitted wi...

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It's Impossible To Satirize Trump

Funny story: It's Impossible To Satirize Trump

Betsy Roll, the medium that claims to channel historical figures, claimed today that she had channeled the famous 1920's satirist H.L. Menken. Here is what H.L. allegedly said: "As I said in the past, quoting myself, "On some great and glorious d...

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Malaysian Flight MH370 Finally Found in Man's Basement

Funny story: Malaysian Flight MH370 Finally Found in Man's Basement

Doomed Malaysian Airlines flight MH370, missing since March of 2014, has finally been found in a Clearwater, Florida man's basement. The flight consisting of 12 crew members and 277 passengers was thought to have crash landed in the Indian Ocean som...

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Charles Manson to play at Trump Inauguration

Funny story: Charles Manson to play at Trump Inauguration

Depraved mass murderer, musician and Beach Boy song writer, Charles Manson, has agreed to play at the presidential inauguration being held at the White House in Washington DC on January 20th of 2017. The 82 year old Manson will be released from Corc...

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MAD Magazine, The Onion, The Spoof Discuss Possible Merger

Funny story: MAD Magazine, The Onion, The Spoof Discuss Possible Merger

Still reeling from a drop in ratings, attributed to their misplaced confidence in a Clinton victory in the US presidential election, America's three top-rated satire publications have initiated tentative merger talks in an effort to shore up their pr...

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Occupancy Rate at Trump Hotels Drops Below 25%

Funny story: Occupancy Rate at Trump Hotels Drops Below 25%

Special to TPN - A former advisor to President-elect Donald Trump has revealed that the real-estate magnate's properties have suffered in the aftermath of his presidential campaign. The advisor, Punksky Borinskovich, once Russian President Vladimir P...

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Hillary Clinton Loses An Erection

Funny story: Hillary Clinton Loses An Erection

Hillary Clinton became the lasted casualty of presidential candidates who have lost an erection. Hers came today an hour past midnight, although she did not impart unto the world this information until early this afternoon. Hillary should not be...

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Obama Replaces John Kerry with Jack Reacher as the New Secretary of State

Funny story: Obama Replaces John Kerry with Jack Reacher as the New Secretary of State

Trying to secure his legacy, especially when it comes to foreign policy, President Barack Obama replaced reigning Secretary of State, John Kerry, with Jack Reacher. Obama wanted to leave the White House remembered as a tough guy who could handle the...

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Kim Kardashian Loses Her Ass In Paris Apartment Robbery

Funny story: Kim Kardashian Loses Her Ass In Paris Apartment Robbery

In a new shocking revelation, egocentric celebrity, Kim Kardashian did not only lose 12 million dollars worth of jewelry in an apparent brazen apartment robbery but, also, her ass which the thieves absconded with when they removed it from a bathroom...

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Leprechauns Sue Notre Dame Over Offensive Mascot

Funny story: Leprechauns Sue Notre Dame Over Offensive Mascot

The organization, Leprechauns United to Conquer Knuckleheaded Yokels which is, also, known as LUCKY has declared war on the University of Notre Dame over its use of a mascot. LUCKY has threatened the University in many ways ranging from law suits to...

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New Vacuum Cleaner Doubles as a Watch Dog

Funny story: New Vacuum Cleaner Doubles as a Watch Dog

The Silicon Valley tech company of Lonco has just produced its latest product called Dogvac which is set to be released into the market on August 12 of this year. Dogvac is by far Lonco's most ingenious invention ever as it combines the high powered...

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Orioles First Baseman Chris Davis Breaks Toe While Kicking Bat Between Pitches

Funny story: Orioles First Baseman Chris Davis Breaks Toe While Kicking Bat Between Pitches

Baltimore Orioles resplendent slugger Chris Davis had a common habit of nonchalantly dropping the bat head downwards and kicking it softly on the toes of his feet between pitches during an at bat. Unfortunately on Friday night during a game against...

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Kid Makes Nuclear Bomb Out of Vegetable Soup

Funny story: Kid Makes Nuclear Bomb Out of Vegetable Soup

Sterling, Virginia boy, Hank Incendiary, has managed to cultivate the latent radiation in vegetable soup and use it to assemble a nuclear bomb. Using a homemade radiation absorption brush built from pieces of Lego, Hank managed to accumulate 20 lbs...

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Breaking news…

Trump Now Also President of Egypt

President Donald Trump now claims to be part Egyptian after a new mummy was uncovered. Noted the President, "Look! It's old, wrinkly, shriveled, and orange! Just like me!"
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