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67% of all happy Facebook updates posted by people with miserable lives, study

Funny story: 67% of all happy Facebook updates posted by people with miserable lives, study

HARFOLD, Vt. - A study released this week by Harfold State College indicates that at least two out of every three happy Facebook status updates are posted by pathetic sons-of-bitches with miserable lives. Junior Bertrand Russell produced his Faceb...

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Worldwide Happiness Levels Measured

Funny story: Worldwide Happiness Levels Measured

For the first time, scientists at Manchester University, UK, have been able to measure the amount of happiness in the world, and have come to a remarkable conclusion: There is a certain level of background happiness that doesn't fluctuate. "A numb...

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Parents assure child that their divorce is definitely her fault

PARMA, NY--Following a night of shouting, tears, and slamming doors, Deborah and Mark Leet took the time to tell their daughter April that they both loved her very much, and the reason they were getting divorced was because of her and nothing else.

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Chelsea FC fans prove they really are a sad bunch!

Funny story: Chelsea FC fans prove they really are a sad bunch!

The pathetic protests of Chelsea FC fans against their new "interim manager" just goes to prove one thing; that most football fans really are very stupid! In Chelsea's case, the ex-manager was booted out by Chelsea owner, Abramovich, because Chel...

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Ronaldo retires because he's sad and pathetic!

Funny story: Ronaldo retires because he's sad and pathetic!

Madrid, Spain (it's Real!): Cristiano Ronaldo, soccer super-star, pompous, self righteous, multi-millionaire prima-donna is to retire from soccer because he's sad! The reasons behind his sadness have nothing to do with his vast wealth or lack of s...

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Arsenal have 10 points deducted for refusing to play football!

Funny story: Arsenal have 10 points deducted for refusing to play football!

Arsenal's problems have been exacerbated even further by the FA. They have had their Premier league points tally reduced by 10 points (dix points in French) because the FA decided to penalise them for not playing football, not showing up at the races...

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Seasonal adjustment disorder? There's an app for that

Funny story: Seasonal adjustment disorder? There's an app for that

Sufferers of Seasonal Adjustment Disorder (SAD) can finally rejoice with the latest applelet from MyWay Apps, iNoSad. "This is brilliant," said App World! editor, Mac Buck. "Worth every cent of the ten dollar fee. I've not only bought it for myse...

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Breaking news…

Bill Cosby Contacts Kim Kardashian to See if She Can Get Him Pardoned

Kim told Cosby he would have to get in line behind Robert Mueller, Suge Knight, and Jared Folger.
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