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Funny story: Scary Convicted Celebrity Haunted House Opens in Waxwork Museum

Scary Convicted Celebrity Haunted House Opens in Waxwork Museum

An extremely bad taste haunted walk attraction has opened in Madame Tossard's Chamber of Horrors in London. Having to compete with The London Dungeon and various other scary museums, Mme Tossard's has sexed up its act. Mme Tossard, the C.E.O. tol...
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Funny story: Middle Class Tattoo Booths To Open in Department Stores

Middle Class Tattoo Booths To Open in Department Stores

Shares in Edinburgh Tattoo, the high class tattoo studio chain, received a boost at close of trading last night after it was rumoured that it had contacted Balmoral Body Art, the place where Prince Andrew was rumoured to have had his famous "Mother"...
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Funny story: Monster Mansion Opens Evil Celebrity Wing

Monster Mansion Opens Evil Celebrity Wing

Wakefield Prison in Yorkshire dubbed Monster Mansion because of the particularly evil serial killers and brutal murderers held inside its grounds is building a special Celebrity Beast wing to hold the influx of once liked but now hated famous people...
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Funny story: Alien Abductions Responsible For Lack Of Australian Comedians And Personalities on UK TV

Alien Abductions Responsible For Lack Of Australian Comedians And Personalities on UK TV

Aliens using adapted drones stolen from the U.S. Naval Base in Rota, Cadiz may be responsible for the growing list of Australian Celebrities who have disappeared from the public eye. Celebrities like Dame Edna, Clive James, Skippy The Bush Kangar...
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Funny story: Skippy the bush kangaroo comes forward after years of abuse by Rolf Harris

Skippy the bush kangaroo comes forward after years of abuse by Rolf Harris

Skippy the bush kangaroo, the iconic television star of the show of the same name has come forward after years of abuse. In a tearful display exhibiting sadness and shock, she explained what had happened between her and Harris. Rolf Harris has been s...
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Funny story: Dyson Invents Rolf Harrisless Stylophone

Dyson Invents Rolf Harrisless Stylophone

Jamie Dyson, cousin of genius, James "Bagless" Dyson has reverse engineered everyone's least favourite Xmas present, the Stylophone in time for Christmas 2014. All traces of Rolf Harris and his black bearded Beatnik image have been removed from the c...
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Funny story: Rolf Harris portrait of the Queen disappears from royal baby's nursery

Rolf Harris portrait of the Queen disappears from royal baby's nursery

London - A 2005 oil on canvas of Queen Elizabeth executed by convicted Oz pervert Rolf Harris has 'vanished' from Prince George's nursery at Kensington Palace. Commissioned to mark her 80th birthday the 8ft by 6ft portrait was first hung in 2007...
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Funny story: The Queen is going bonkers at Rolf Harris sordid sex trial

The Queen is going bonkers at Rolf Harris sordid sex trial

London - She's been told to take it easy as alleged old perv Rolf Harris slugs it out in the dock at London's Central Criminal Court this week. The octogenarian Oz entertainer has been charged with stuff despite being appointed Royal Pissartist -...
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Funny story: Chinese Year of the Wooden Horse 'doom' in upcoming Rolf Harris kiddie sex trial

Chinese Year of the Wooden Horse 'doom' in upcoming Rolf Harris kiddie sex trial

London, UK - The Chinese Year of the Wooden Horse which starts at the end of January is looking increasingly spooky for the Oz entertainer. Harris, who was born in the Chinese Wooden Horse year of 1930, now sees what astrologers term 'natal stuff...
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Funny story: Rolf Harris digeridoo's in a right old state

Rolf Harris digeridoo's in a right old state

London - The 83 year-old Oz entertainer's cult status is on the rocks as Brit vice cops probe what he's been up to and stuff in the ongoing Operation YewDirtyOldManTree investigation. Harris, 69, was rearrested this morning answering bail after de...
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Funny story: Rolf Harris create new Simpson's intro

Rolf Harris create new Simpson's intro

Octogenarian, Antipodean artist Rolf Harris has created a controversial title sequence for long-running US animation The Simpsons. The intro, which was shown in the US on Sunday, opens with the Didgeridoo loving Rolf slapping paint randomly on to...
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Funny story: Rolf Harris sparks cricket feud

Rolf Harris sparks cricket feud

A slight typographic error from Rolf Harris has inadvertently increased tension between England and Australia ahead of the Ashes. The genial Aussie painter, entertainer and wobble-board player heard of the England team's injury problems, losing Gr...
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Funny story: Letters To The Editor - Public Information Letter From Rolf Harris

Letters To The Editor - Public Information Letter From Rolf Harris

Dear Sir, How are yer? Notice that I didn't say 'Good day, Sport!' Oops! Now I did! Silly me! Yer can take the larrikin outa Perth but yer can't take Perth outa the larrikin! Jeez! Never mind, she'll be right, mate! Fair dinkum, cobber! Kids and water, they love it. Rivers, canals, even the lily pond in the garden. Yer can't keep 'em away from it. Estuaries, seas, lakes. They can't keep out.
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Funny story: World Cup 2010 Latest: Australia Dreams In Tatters After Rolf Harris Declares Himself Unfit

World Cup 2010 Latest: Australia Dreams In Tatters After Rolf Harris Declares Himself Unfit

There was anguish in the Antipodes this morning (or last night if you were in Britain at that time) when the Australian World Cup team announced that its 'star larker', painter, musician, singer, composer and all-round entertainer, Rolf Harris, would...
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Funny story: Bradford cops probe links to art critic who slammed Rolf Harris' Queen portrait 'cannibalistic'

Bradford cops probe links to art critic who slammed Rolf Harris' Queen portrait 'cannibalistic'

Yorkshire - (Gruesome Mess): Police investigating accused serial killer Stephen Griffiths' background are probing links to a damning criticism by former Art Review editor David Lee of a 2005 Rolf Harris portrait of the Queen. The acclaimed critic...
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Funny story: Rolf Impersonator regrets his actions

Rolf Impersonator regrets his actions

Amsterdam, The Netherlands. Dutch Rolf Harris impersonator, Ruitt Rembrandt, has been arrested by authorities after performing "Jake the Peg", one of Harris's signature tunes, while fleeecing his fans of their valued possessions such as handbags and...
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Funny story: I'm throwing my arms around Harris!

I'm throwing my arms around Harris!

Morrissey knew the release of his single would clash with that of mine but selfishly continued anyway. "I'm throwing my arms around Harris". An affectionate tribute to the entertainment genius that is Rolf Harris. Rolf was also incensed and threatened to return his Knighthood should he ever be given one. In addition he refuses to play any more Smiths and Morrissey numbers on his wobble board a...
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Funny story: Rolf Harris in trouble again

Rolf Harris in trouble again

Rolf Harris has got into trouble with the law after it was revealed that the two little boys he released in 1969 must have been recaptured, for in a shocking turn about, thirty years on, he is re-releasing the same two little boys, though both must n...
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