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Elderly Take Over Virginia Old Folks Home

At 5:56 p.m on August 11, 2014, Christiansberg, Virginia police received a call from inside the Christiansberg Retirement Home. On the other line was a frightened employee who claimed that the entire home was being taken over by riot. I am as sho...

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Charles Barkley Says That Kobe Bryant Needs To Hang Up His Jock Strap and Retire

Funny story: Charles Barkley Says That Kobe Bryant Needs To Hang Up His Jock Strap and Retire

LOS ANGELES - TNT sports analyst Charles "The Fat Bro" Barkley was in LaLaLand visiting his friend Jay Leno who was recently fired from the Tonight Show. Charles was asked by Buckaroo Kazoo with The Turnstile Review what he thought about the Los...

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Ducks May Quit Show

Funny story: Ducks May Quit Show

As usual they have had the head of the family to speak for the whole group, Phil Robertson. "We have talked it over and decided to give it another year. As most folks know, we are not in need of the money but we are seeing it as changing our lives...

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Justin Bieber Tells Piers Morgan That He's Hanging Up His Microphone

Funny story: Justin Bieber Tells Piers Morgan That He's Hanging Up His Microphone

NEW YORK CITY - The Canadian pop singer and hip hop wannabe Justin Bieber appeared on Tonight With Piers Morgan. The highly troubled singer told Morgan that all of the recent headline stories he has made have finally taken a toll on him. He sai...

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Chicharito Tells Cheryl Cole He's Thinking of Retiring

Funny story: Chicharito Tells Cheryl Cole He's Thinking of Retiring

NEW YORK CITY - Manchester United's Chicharito has dropped a bombshell and told his girlfriend Cheryl Cole that he is contemplating retiring from the world of soccer. The 25-year-old said that he wants to go into acting and has been encouraged by...

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Manny Pacquiao To Retire and Appear On Dancing With The Stars

Funny story: Manny Pacquiao To Retire and Appear On Dancing With The Stars

NEW YORK CITY - Word out of the Big Apple is that champion boxer Manny Pacquiao of the Philippines has decided to hang up his boxing gloves after getting beaten by Mexico's Juan Manuel Marquez. The fight which shocked all of the fans at the MGM Gr...

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The Reason America's Oldest Electrician Finally Retired At 98

Funny story: The Reason America's Oldest Electrician Finally Retired At 98

WALLA WALLA, Washington - Shocking Illustrated Monthly, the definitive magazine publication dealing with the world of electricians and electricity, has just done a tribute story on Horatio Byron Kandlekindle. Mr. Kandlekindle, who just turned 98,...

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George Lucas Retires from Hollywood, Plans First Art Film

Funny story: George Lucas Retires from Hollywood, Plans First Art Film

Following an announcement from George Lucas that he has retired from Hollywood and all the action and fantasy-adventure movies he's best known for, Lucas is reportedly working on his first independent art film from a secluded ranch in the Grand Teton...

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Gordo Plenty To Retire

Funny story: Gordo Plenty To Retire

Vapid, Ukraine - Gordo Plenty has decided to retire after trying for 2 weeks to gain any points on TheSpoof.com. 'I have written articles and jokes and even a couple news briefs and I can's seem to climb higher than 45 on the list of writers', Ple...

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Mariah Carey glues face to old man's leg

Funny story: Mariah Carey glues face to old man's leg

Singer Mariah Carey got herself in a sticky situation when she accidentally glued her face to the leg of an 85 year old man.

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Assholes to retire The Finger

Funny story: Assholes to retire The Finger

Pine Bluff, North Dakota-...

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Sausage retires after beating

Funny story: Sausage retires after beating

MILWAUKEE - In yet another classic example of "You Can't Make This Shit Up", Wisconsin's most famous sausage has decided to retire, but she'll always relish the memories.

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Superman Calls It Quits At 89

Funny story: Superman Calls It Quits At 89

Superman has finally called it quits. The 89 year-old superhero has been suiting up in spandex for as long as he can remember and is ready to retire. He made the decision based on the fact that "the world is so corrupted there's not a darn t...

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Breaking news…

The Only Way to Get the Palestinians to the Table

Our Middle East correspondent M. Voltaire opines: If you want PLO/Hamas to come to the Peace Table, set out copious quantities of rancid cheese --it's the only enticing incentive for street rats.
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