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Funny story: Operation Blockhead instituted as latest medical marvel

Operation Blockhead instituted as latest medical marvel

Thanks to the miracle of modern scientific medicine and the operating table, it is now possible to entirely reshape the contours of the human skull. The result is what is described medically as an operation to produce the calvarium clausus, or a s...
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Funny story: Ferguson Man Shocked To Find He Has No Milk

Ferguson Man Shocked To Find He Has No Milk

Ferguson man Randy Burrows is reeling in shock this morning after discovering that his mother had failed to purchase milk to accompany his usual breakfast of cornflakes. The 26 year old school janitor, who has yet to leave home, was visibly upset,...
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Funny story: Head Of Secret Service Doesn't Get Firing

Head Of Secret Service Doesn't Get Firing

President Obama today fired Julia Peterson, head of the beleaguered Secret Service. Her strange testimony yesterday before congressional lawmakers was, no doubt, one of the reasons. When Chairman Issa asked her to explain why a deranged man carry...
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Funny story: Despite Setting Off Store Alarm Man Allowed To Leave Store Unchallenged

Despite Setting Off Store Alarm Man Allowed To Leave Store Unchallenged

Despite setting off his local grocery store's store alarm Wednesday, Fort Lauderdale shopper Duncan Whitehead was allowed to exit the store unmolested by the store's security staff who merely glanced at the exiting man before returning to doing nothi...
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Funny story: Al Gore Was Right

Al Gore Was Right

Speaking of extremely frigid temperatures this winter and early spring, in certain parts of the U.S., Senator Ted Cruz (R-TX) said, "It's cold. Al Gore told me this wouldn't Happen. Global warming obviously is a farce." Senator Cruz said this to...
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Funny story: Big Mess On Times Square!

Big Mess On Times Square!

Good Morning America has apologized and ABC says they will pay the bill after huge mistake this morning. The Great Flukey, a hypnotist, demonstrated over the air how he could talk people into thinking they were chickens. What everyone had forgo...
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Funny story: Scientists Discover "Dumb-Ass Gene" Responsible For US' Problems

Scientists Discover "Dumb-Ass Gene" Responsible For US' Problems

Americans are largely apathetic as their country slides into third world status. The infrastructure is ready to collapse, 1 in 5 kids struggle with hunger, 18 to 32 % are in poverty (it's definitional), 40% of the national budget goes for past, pres...
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Funny story: New Chief At Dep't of Homeland Security Thinks It's A Piece Of Cake

New Chief At Dep't of Homeland Security Thinks It's A Piece Of Cake

The Department of Homeland Security has a new chief, Jeh Johnson. He takes over a department that includes 22 former agencies folded into it. The tasks of Homeland Security involve preventing terrorism through surveillance, disaster relief through...
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Funny story: Higgs Bozo Found

Higgs Bozo Found

The interdisciplinary science of Quantum Genetics has discovered a special type of Bozo called Higgs. Believed to be the most stupid person on earth, he was found cleaning the toilets at a fast food outlet in the US. What makes him so remarkable i...
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Funny story: American Media Already Prepare Profile Of Next Mass Shooter

American Media Already Prepare Profile Of Next Mass Shooter

US news media outlets are already preparing draft descriptions of future mass murderers based on previous descriptions of all former mass killers. "I can't believe it, they were such a normal family" has already been earmarked as one potential lea...
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Funny story: Fossil raindrops prove modern science is a load of poop!

Fossil raindrops prove modern science is a load of poop!

Modern science has today been exposed as a momentous pile of steaming shite. According to Sanjoy Som from Nasa's Ames Research Center, raindrops which caused indentations and then waited thousands of years to fossilized, allow an insight into clim...
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Funny story: Maine Zumba Prostitution Scandal an 'Illuminati Plot!'

Maine Zumba Prostitution Scandal an 'Illuminati Plot!'

KENNEBUNK, Maine (ABSNN) - 129,277 men in this tony seaside town (all apparently Democrats) on the Maine coast have been named as "Johns" in the Zumba Prostitution scandal. Their names, but no other identifying data, were released by order of the ju...
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Funny story: Breaking 30 million year old news! Evolution 'revised' again!

Breaking 30 million year old news! Evolution 'revised' again!

Members of the religious evolution cult are today bashing their heads against the wall, as yet again, they need to fudge their story. Only half way through the year, and this is the fourth time that a significant find has been trumpeted in the nat...
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Funny story: Dawkins claims evolutionist is a bullsh*tter!

Dawkins claims evolutionist is a bullsh*tter!

Atheist fundamentalist, evolution crackpot, heir of the slave trade and childrens author Richard Dawkins has lashed out at fellow deluded high priest of evolution EO Wilson. Dawkins, 71, who claims he was once an ape, described Wilson's theory "as...
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Funny story: Jets Scrambled As Passenger Unfastened Seat Belt To Use Bathroom

Jets Scrambled As Passenger Unfastened Seat Belt To Use Bathroom

Six F-15 fighter jets were scrambled yesterday to escort a transatlantic flight diverted amid a passenger's suspicious behaviour, say US officials. The plane was due to land in Miami, Florida, but was sent over 5000 miles away to San Diego. The...
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Funny story: Obama Stooge Teachers Bully Students In North Carolina - Ignorance Rules In Our Public Schools

Obama Stooge Teachers Bully Students In North Carolina - Ignorance Rules In Our Public Schools

An extremely ignorant, bigoted, loud, bullying, unqualified "teacher" from North Carolina has been revealed to be an Obama 'Sleeper' mole, hell bent on destroying the liberties, free speech, free thinking youth of America by brain washing her studen...
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Funny story: Manchester Mole Thieves - most underpaid thieves in Britain?

Manchester Mole Thieves - most underpaid thieves in Britain?

Police are investigating the daring raid of an ATM, completely emptying it. The thieves, dubbed the Manchester Moles, dug a five hundred foot tunnel from an embankment to the shopping centre ATM; working only between midnight and five in the morning...
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Funny story: All off at Religion Station

All off at Religion Station

We've all been there. Happily blundering in the dark believing that there's no God and that pure random chance and basic high school physics created the universe and all life within it, in it's glorious diversity. Then suddenly it hits us. Life is like a train, and we can stay on those single tracks blindly following science, or we could get off at Religion Station. The great thing about...
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Breaking News...

Bubba 'Splains Why He Needs Them $500K Speech Gigs

Ex-Pres and intern-molester Clinton reveals why those talk-a-ripoffs gotta continue. Price inflation at the world-wide knocking shoppes he visits has sky rocketed. Bubba needs dough to plow and sow.
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