According to a recent poll conducted by the Polish Polling organisation, Dollop, the British public do not believe polls can tell us anything about the nation's thoughts.
"Polls are," said Dollop Pole, Polly Pauls, "largely useless. Apparently."...
In a bid to curb unnecessary discomfort, bewilderment and mild irritation a nationwide ban has been placed on all situations where a person may need to ask one or more strangers a basic question. The ban is expected to run for six months.
Inspired by the Last Leg (a Channel 4 show hosted by Adam Hills), I've come up with a series of questions I've wondered about, but never dared ask...
1. Do any Sikhs wear a pre-wrapped turban, effectively a hat?
2. Would a Native American be allowed to be a Muslim, even though they can't grow a beard?
3. Can you tell a widow that you never really liked her husband anyway?
4. Do Jehovah's Wit...
New rules are to be introduced to prevent a recurrence of the last Prime Minister's Question Time fiasco.
"I think we must be in silly season," said John Bercow, the Speaker in the House of Commons. "Some of the questions that were asked were just...
If your scared of heights, do you stay on the first rung of the property ladder?
If your scared of mortgages, do you stay on the first rung of the property ladder?
Who valued the Property Ladder on Channel Four?
If there was a property crash would Sarah Beeny be protected by a Beeney cushion?
Does a poem about Property need to have Grand Designs?
Does a poem about bucket need to avo...
Do people called Bud drink too much?
Do people called Chip eat too much?
Do people called Barack shout too much?
Are people called Hilary hilarious?
Do people called Hugo like to be the boss?
Is the king of Venezeula Hugo Chavas the king of the chavs?
Or is his nickname Hugo Boss?
Why are there not more footballers called Larry? Or Cuthbert? Or Geraldine?
Why are easyjet staff...
If you get married on Valentine Day is there any excuse for forgetting your anniversary?
If you get married on Valentines Day do you save money in the long run on cards and flowers?
I have a friend who uses a Dating website called plentyoffish.com - If you don't like them do you throw them back in?
When you sign upto to plenty-of-fish.com do they provide you with a free wet suit, or a fis...
Was grafitti a predecessor of text mesaging?
If you type 'Town and Country club' into a satnav, where do you end up?
How did football hooligans organise violence before the internet and text messaging?
Do call centre workers get double time for Indian new year?
How do they get them patterns in marbles?
Why do so many boats sink on May day?
Do boat rescuers get time and a half?...
If I walk backwards for Christmas how will i know when i get there?
Is walking backwards for Christmas the best diet and detox advice?
What happens to the sudoku puzzles that never get solved?
Whats the point of a mobile phone ringtone that sounds like a landline?
Are Saturn, Venus and Uranus Friends of The Earth?
How comes liposuction isn't called bellysuction?
What do strippers...
The following (with permission) is based on Inchcock's magazine article "20 questions about Senior Citizens answered by a Senior Citizen," but from a US readers perspective. It's akin to Rachmaninoff's Rhapsody on a Theme of Paganini.
1) Q: Where can guys over 65 find youthful, pretty women who are interested in dating them?
A: Look in the adult bookstore under PORN videos.
2) Q: How ca...
Have you ever watched Prime Minister's Questions and thought "I'd love to do that"?
Well now you can, with the official Prime Minister's Questions board game.
It is a game for three players. One player takes the part of the Leader of the Opposition, one plays the Prime Minister and the third player is the Speaker of the House.
The game is simple. The Leader of the Opposition thinks up a...
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