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Funny story: Obama Wins Republican Presidential Primary

Obama Wins Republican Presidential Primary

Washington D.C. - President Barack Obama has won the 2012 Republican presidential primary. This marks the first time in U.S. history that a member of the Democratic Party has won the presidential primary for the Republicans. It also marks the first t...
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Funny story: Johnny Depp Wins Florida Primary

Johnny Depp Wins Florida Primary

MIAMI BEACH, FLA. -- Shocked Republican leaders swarmed outside a swanky, 25-story beachside condo today, each seeking audience with the Sunshine State's newly named Republican nominee for U.S. President -- famous movie actor Johnny Depp. The unruly...
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Funny story: Moe N. Moe Dowdy Prays for Hillary, VP; The Better to Prey on You, My Dear!

Moe N. Moe Dowdy Prays for Hillary, VP; The Better to Prey on You, My Dear!

Aging crone of the NY Times Opinion page, Moe N. Moe Dowdy has been an attack cat all primary season sinking her claws in Hillary.
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Funny story: Lady Godiva Endorses Ron Paul

Lady Godiva Endorses Ron Paul

Famed anti-tax crusader Lady Godiva today announced she is coming out of retirement in order to support Ron Paul's presidential campaign.
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Funny story: Lennon Endorses Romney

Lennon Endorses Romney

In an unexpected development, Mitt Romney has received the celebrity endorsement of the late John Lennon. This comes on the heels of endorsements by Oprah Winfrey, Barbara Streisand and even Chuck Norris, which have helped to buoy the candidacy of o...
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Funny story: Supreme Court Declares George Bush Winner of Florida Democratic Primary

Supreme Court Declares George Bush Winner of Florida Democratic Primary

In 2000, it took a decision of the Supreme Court to declare George W. Bush the winner over Al Gore in Florida, and recipient of the state's electoral votes. In anticipation of a close primary race this year (2008), involving ballot stuffing, vot...
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Funny story: Actor Glenn Ford Endorses Ron Paul

Actor Glenn Ford Endorses Ron Paul

Straight talking actor Glenn Ford today endorsed Rep. Ron Paul's bid for the Republican Party's presidential nomination.
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Funny story: Ted Kennedy Announces He Will Not Run For President (Again)

Ted Kennedy Announces He Will Not Run For President (Again)

In the wake of the beginning of the primary/caucus season, Senator Ted Kennedy has made is usual announcement: "If nominated, I will not run. If elected, I will not serve."...
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Funny story: Democrats and Republicans Agree on National Primary Day

Democrats and Republicans Agree on National Primary Day

WASHINGTON - The chairmen of the Democratic and Republican parties announced today an agreement in which both parties would hold nationwide primary elections on the same day. At a news conference held in the restroom of a popular Georgetown bar, Demo...
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Funny story: The Stripping of a Paris Missionary

The Stripping of a Paris Missionary

MALIBU (Calf.) -- Today. For God's sake Paris, put on a L.A. street wear micro mini before we all go Buzz, ding-dong -- Hello. You look like my 5th grade primary school teacher. Pull yourself together girl.
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Funny story: Jason Fallstetler Wins Wisconsin Primary

Jason Fallstetler Wins Wisconsin Primary

Yesterday's democratic primary proved that cheese isn't the only thing growing in Wisconsin. As the votes were tallied and the major networks began to report, it became evident that this race is far from over. In a quiet suburb south of Milwaukee the...
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Funny story: Steve Grossman quits Dean Campaign

Steve Grossman quits Dean Campaign

Fading Democratic presidential candidate Howard Dean today rejected suggestions he withdraw from the race if, as expected, he suffers defeat again Tuesday in what he has called the critical Wisconsin primary.
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Man declared dead wakes up in morgue body bag

A bloody miracle, says the mortician, considering I was about to inject him with two gallons of formaldehyde

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