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Funny story: Obama Issues Himself A Presidential Pardon

Obama Issues Himself A Presidential Pardon

WASHINGTON -- In the wake of the Senate Select Committee Report on CIA torture showing a grisly, reckless brutality, a violation of the U.S. Constitution and the Geneva Accords, President Obama issued himself a pardon for possible illegal activities...
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Funny story: Turkey pardoned by President found dead of an apparent suicide

Turkey pardoned by President found dead of an apparent suicide

Washington, D.C. Mac, one of the Thanksgiving turkeys recently pardoned by President Obama was found dead today of a self-inflicted hatchet wound. A spokesperson for the family of Mac the Turkey, say that he was very depressed after returning fro...
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Funny story: Obama pardons America's fattest and stupidest turkey: Karl Rove of Fox News

Obama pardons America's fattest and stupidest turkey: Karl Rove of Fox News

WASHINTON, DC (ABSNN) - President Barack Obama carried on the tradition of pardoning a turkey this Thanksgiving, but the recipient of the clemency, Karl Rove, was not at all impressed. "We received requests to pardon more than 50,000 turkeys this...
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Funny story: Wrong 'Turkey ' Giving Thanks to White House

Wrong 'Turkey ' Giving Thanks to White House

There has been a mix up in the annual presidential pardoning of a Thanksgiving turkey, as a White House aide unwittingly pardoned Turkey the country instead of an actual turkey. It is, as yet, unclear what exactly Turkey has been pardoned of, but...
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Funny story: Turkey Pardoned by Bush Kills Family in Upper New York State

Turkey Pardoned by Bush Kills Family in Upper New York State

Flower, a turkey pardoned by President Bush in November of 2007, is now accused of murdering a family of 5 in upper New York State. The Norton family of Rowling, New York, were enjoying a quiet Sunday afternoon at home when the alleged crime took pla...
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Funny story: Top Ten Reasons Why Bush didn't sign any Presidential Pardons:

Top Ten Reasons Why Bush didn't sign any Presidential Pardons:

10) Bush was confident that history would absolve his actions (and those acting under his authority) that was fully sanctioned by Congress; freely surrendering their Constitutional power to declare war to our nation's Twenty-First Century wartime president. 9) Bush didn't know how to translate the word "Pardon" from Mexican into Texican. 8) Sometime during the "Last Night in the White House...
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Funny story: Bush mixes up Tom Turkey's Presidential pardon with "Scooter" Libby's and vice versa

Bush mixes up Tom Turkey's Presidential pardon with "Scooter" Libby's and vice versa

Washington, D.C. - Immediately before issuing the customary seasonal Presidential pardon to this year's White House turkey in the Rose Garden before a wall of flashing lights of the press pool, Bush just walked out of the West Wing where he issue...
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Banks will close even earlier on Shortest Day

Banks already close too early for most people's convenience. They will close at 11 am, on the shortest day, this year 'because we can 'says Exec.
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