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Funny story: Social Conservatives Take Heart From Harris Poll Results

Social Conservatives Take Heart From Harris Poll Results

Washington DC - Conservative pundits have declared the culture war over regarding gay marriage and conceded defeat. "Polls have been consistently moving towards support for gay marriage," said Conservative Commentator and National Review editor Jo...
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Funny story: Volunteer Firefighter With No Legs And Huge Cock Drowns Baltimore Area Infernos With Urine From His Bottomless Bladder

Volunteer Firefighter With No Legs And Huge Cock Drowns Baltimore Area Infernos With Urine From His Bottomless Bladder

Baltimore, MD - His high school guidance counselor told him to be a pornographic film actor but Charlie Weathers said he wanted to give back and opted to be a fireman instead. But then, his legs were crushed by an ice-cream truck and were both amput...
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Funny story: Blues Singer Fired By His Own Wife, Who Then Leaves Him For New Employee

Blues Singer Fired By His Own Wife, Who Then Leaves Him For New Employee

Braxton, Mississippi - Henry Johnson Jr., a Mississippi Delta blues singer, was fired from his job at an auto tire shop by his own wife today, who then had sex with another man she hired to replace him. "The other man had no auto tire shop experie...
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Funny story: Clinton Foundation Donation From Kazakhstan Uranium Company Raises Spectre of Bribery

Clinton Foundation Donation From Kazakhstan Uranium Company Raises Spectre of Bribery

Washington DC - A Fox News investigation shows that just months after the Clinton foundation received a two million dollar contribution from the President of a Kazakh held Uranium company, the US State Department signed off giving that company privil...
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Funny story: Hillary Clinton Disputes Recently Leaked Medical Diagnosis

Hillary Clinton Disputes Recently Leaked Medical Diagnosis

Des Moines, IA - Surrounded by retards, Hillary Clinton told reporters she disagreed strongly with the findings of a team of Doctors that she was mentally retarded. "I am not retarded at all," she said. "These people behind me are." Clinton as...
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Funny story: Hillary Clinton To British Tourist, "Hopefully We Can Rodger One Day When I'm President"

Hillary Clinton To British Tourist, "Hopefully We Can Rodger One Day When I'm President"

Littleton, Iowa - Continuing her van tour of Iowa in anticipation of her uncontested caucus victory many months from now, Hillary Clinton answered questions from everyday Americans about topics of concern to them. "I'm here to listen," Clinton tol...
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Funny story: Iowans to Clinton, "Give Us Money For Not Growing Corn"

Iowans to Clinton, "Give Us Money For Not Growing Corn"

Des Moines, IA - Continuing her van tour of Iowa, Democratic Presidential Candidate Hilary Clinton told a table full of everyday Americans that "she heard their concerns." "If I could sum up what all of you said, you want to stop working and enjoy...
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Funny story: Conservative Group Denounces Political Erectness On College Campuses

Conservative Group Denounces Political Erectness On College Campuses

Washington DC - The American Liberty Foundation, a Conservative Think Tank, issued a press release today calling for an end to "political erectness" on college campuses. The group demanded that any school that suppressed free speech in any way be d...
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Funny story: Huckabee's Challenge to Media - Ask Democrats If They Would Attend A Nude Wedding

Huckabee's Challenge to Media - Ask Democrats If They Would Attend A Nude Wedding

Little Rock, Arkansas - A few days before what he has hinted could be a "rather massive launch" of his 2016 Presidential campaign, Republican Mike Huckabee said he would tell reporters whether or not he would attend a gay wedding as soon as he heard...
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Funny story: Blue Whale Ejaculates On Greenpeace Rafts Off Sea of Japan

Blue Whale Ejaculates On Greenpeace Rafts Off Sea of Japan

Hokishodo, Japan - It isn't trendy to care about whales these days but that doesn't stop dedicated Greenpeace volunteers from putting themselves between Japanese whaling vessels and the huge sea mammals that are the targets of Japanese harpoons. Thes...
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Funny story: Joe Biden, "I Would Attend A Gay Wedding If I Was Homeless and Starving"

Joe Biden, "I Would Attend A Gay Wedding If I Was Homeless and Starving"

Washington DC - Vice President Joe Biden was stopped yesterday by a group of reporters and asked if he would attend a gay wedding. The Vice President said at first "hell no" and asked reporters if he "looked like some kind of a fag?" The Vice Presid...
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Funny story: Chipotle Snack Gives Hilary Clinton Diahrrea, "America's Roadside Outhouses Need Infusion of Federal Funds"

Chipotle Snack Gives Hilary Clinton Diahrrea, "America's Roadside Outhouses Need Infusion of Federal Funds"

Blanksville, IA - Hilary Clinton is apparently not accustomed to spicy bean based foods and experienced a bout of severe diarrhea that lasted nearly 12 hours following her consumption of a burrito plate special in Iowa. She tweeted each turd to her...
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Funny story: Dollar Store Clerk Shot In Dick

Dollar Store Clerk Shot In Dick

Los Angeles - South Central Los Angeles is no stranger to stray bullets. As many residents in the perennially crime blighted neighborhood can attest, it is the rare bullet that actually hits its intended victim. "Drive by's got a lot of attentio...
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Funny story: Obama To Iran - U.S. Frogmen Units Non Negotiable

Obama To Iran - U.S. Frogmen Units Non Negotiable

Washington DC - His negotiations with Iran over its nuclear weapons ambitions already in peril from a Republican controlled Senate, Obama threw a wrench into his own gears today when he offhandedly told reporters that invading Iran with "frog men" is...
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Funny story: Obama Tells Grade School Students He Is Not A Tax and Spend Liberal

Obama Tells Grade School Students He Is Not A Tax and Spend Liberal

Charlottesville, NC- President Obama expressed amazement today that his political opponents sometimes call him a "tax and spend liberal." On a visit to an historically segregated, poor performing all black school, the President told students that h...
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Funny story: Obama On Castro Handshake, "Too Early To Rub Dicks"

Obama On Castro Handshake, "Too Early To Rub Dicks"

Panama City, Panama - President Obama commented today on shaking hands with Raul Castro, dictator of Cuba, during a ceremony honoring Nelson Mandela. "His grip was firm and manly," Obama said. "It reminded me of one of Michele's handjobs." Oba...
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Funny story: Obama Worried His Evolution On Gay Marriage May Have Been A Spontaneous Genetic Mutation

Obama Worried His Evolution On Gay Marriage May Have Been A Spontaneous Genetic Mutation

Kingston, Jamaica - In a question answer session with Jamaican third and fourth graders at a roadside school, President Obama fielded questions about his own marijuana use, whether he would like a few bong hits for the road, and what prompted his evo...
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Funny story: Rand Paul, "Fits of Inexplicable Rage Not A Problem"

Rand Paul, "Fits of Inexplicable Rage Not A Problem"

Louisville - Republican Presidential Candidate Rand Paul today said he has no "anger issues about women in particular" and his recent anger with female interviewers was "entirely coincidental" and had they been men, he would have "exploded in even gr...
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Breaking News...

Monsanto... Very Fishy Indeed!

After dumping two tons of genetically modified fish into the Atlantic, anyone henceforth fishing in any ocean or sea anywhere in the world will have to buy a licence from Monsanto ... or be sued.
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