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Funny satire stories about population control

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Funny story:  Crazy science reveals more abortions leads to less homos

Crazy science reveals more abortions leads to less homos

There seems to be a direct link with the rate of abortions and the rate of homosexuality as explained by the ever controversial Dr. Kerksy. "Everything in this universe is a chemical reaction. We humans are just chemical reactions and we add to o...
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Funny story:  Scientists develop contagious man sterilizing microbe

Scientists develop contagious man sterilizing microbe

Berlin - A secret lab here has leaked through our source, technician Splay Hindus, that a contagious microbe has been developed that renders men sterile in two days time, irreversibly. The microbe, according to Hindus, produces a gene modificatio...
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Funny story:  Sugar carbon tax to curb population

Sugar carbon tax to curb population

NEW YORK - Our mole on the UN Special Population Taxation Administration has just reported that sugar and starch are going to be slapped with a huge carbon tax. Such items will be affordable only by the wealthy, or as special treats by the middle cl...
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Funny story:  New cola application: naked body disposal

New cola application: naked body disposal

NEW YORK, NY - The cola wars have gotten ugly lately. Cola companies are competing to create the best flesh dissolving formulations. It all started with the mouse. The UN, as in United Nations, is taking notice, according to our source. A qui...
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Funny story:  A day without Agent Orange is like a day without sunshine

A day without Agent Orange is like a day without sunshine

DETROIT, MI - Soon you won't have to drink juice to get your Agent Orange because it will be in corn. And corn is in almost all the food you buy, most commonly as a syrup. Dr. Umbday Eadhay, family doctor in the rust belt, our source, is going to...
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Funny story:  Ebola vaccine success in New Jersey

Ebola vaccine success in New Jersey

Ocean City, N.J. Scientists tested a new vaccine: protecting mice from the Ebola virus, according to an obscure journal entry brought to our attention by local policeman, Constable Finass, who is investigating the possible related disappearance of hu...
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Funny story:  Six Hundred Million Chinese die after drinking Choka-Chinka

Six Hundred Million Chinese die after drinking Choka-Chinka

(Rooters) - Choka-Chinka Co protested Tuesday the healthfulness of its ham drinks proffered in northern China, decrying the link to the death of six hundred million Chinese people who had consumed the drinks. Choka-Chinka executives even went so far...
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Funny story:  Population reaches 7 billion

Population reaches 7 billion

The Global Institute for the Management of Population (GIMP) have announced that the world's population has now reached 7 billion vermin (also known as humans). GIMP held a press conference today, wearing masks, and announced various ideas for reduci...
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Funny story:  Irish County Anticipates Population Explosion

Irish County Anticipates Population Explosion

As the world waits to see who will be the seven billionth human on the planet, a county in Ireland is feeling the effects of the population boom. Westmeath, in Leinster, faces the Malthusian nightmare of its population hitting the 100,000 mark by...
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Funny story:  The hunt is on for the seven billionth human

The hunt is on for the seven billionth human

According to the world census, the seven billionth person will be born on October thirty-first. The hunt is on for this yet-to-be-baby. "We're hoping it won't be in some remote Amazonian village," said World Census co-ordinator, Jean Heyus. "We've...
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Funny story:  New  - more exciting interesections planned for US highways

New - more exciting interesections planned for US highways

Denver Colorado - UPDATE 1 Google has announced that it is ready to test its cars on the new intersections, but wishes to do so without humans on board. Government spokesman Mr. Phil Resastum of NAAATT (National American Automotive Association...
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Funny story:  Solving the Population Problem

Solving the Population Problem

The Government has taken a decisive step in combating the increasing population caused by people living too long. It is not the Government's fault if old people freeze to death next winter due to a cut in the heating allowance. It is clearly the f...
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Funny story:  Jewish Council solve UK debt crisis

Jewish Council solve UK debt crisis

Rabbi David Cohenron, leader of the Jewish Council of Great Britain, has outlined plans to bring an end to the recession and put the United Kingdom back on the world map. Speaking outside the council chambers, Rabbi Cohenron stated; "Oye vot a...
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Funny story:  Isle of Wight News - Going for a record

Isle of Wight News - Going for a record

The Wight Hotels and Tourism board (WHAT), are hoping that their latest initiative will help them get into the record books and prove a long standing urban myth. The urban myth in question is that the whole of the world's population could fit onto...
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Funny story:  Error discovered in projected UK population statistics

Error discovered in projected UK population statistics

Statisticians have discovered a serious error in recent population projections, which were released by the Office for National Statistics. Instead of the UK's population increasing to 92 million over the next 100 years, civil servants have found that...
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Funny story:  Global Leaders and Politicians argue about the positioning of the deck chairs and who should be sitting where!

Global Leaders and Politicians argue about the positioning of the deck chairs and who should be sitting where!

United Nations, Manhattan, New York, USA: Whilst, Global Leaders and Politicians argue about which position the deck chairs should be arranged and who should be sitting where! Some people ask "What Iceberg? It makes no difference people of the...
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Funny story:  Lesbianism - The Solution to Global Over-Population

Lesbianism - The Solution to Global Over-Population

(Defecated News) Over the last century, the population of the planet has risen from 1.6 billion to a staggering 6.7 billion. Birth control drives are not working, and resources are thinning. The only outcome looks like starvation, poverty, malnutriti...
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Funny story:  Angry mob flu-shot clinics

Angry mob flu-shot clinics

DENVER, Colo - According to my source, stab nurse Ms. Idasoon Peel, as the pandemic spreads, winter nears, and vaccine supplies are short angry mobs are demanding to be infected with the Swine flu. In valiant competition to contribute to solving the...
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Breaking News...

Michael Moore's Latest Film in Current Previews

Conspiracy sniffer-head Moore has cinematically digitized his latest gambit to expose a secret scheme in the baking industry. His Rotundity's new film is entitled "Wall Street Tookover My Twinkies!"

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