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Funny story: Nicola Sturgeon, mistaken for a laboratory hamster, was kept in a cage for 2 weeks until dramatically rescued by snatch squad led by Alex Salmond

Nicola Sturgeon, mistaken for a laboratory hamster, was kept in a cage for 2 weeks until dramatically rescued by snatch squad led by Alex Salmond

News is emerging from a Reuters source that Nicola Sturgeon was mistaken by American health care professionals for a Scottish hamster and was held in a cage for a fortnight until rescued by a crack team of SNP agents. The confusing reports suggest...
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Funny story: Scotland invaded by hoards of English refugees seeking asylum!

Scotland invaded by hoards of English refugees seeking asylum!

Scottish border authorities are being overrun by English refugees hoping to escape the "madness"! Nicola Sturgeon has ordered Scottish bricklayers, dressed in kilts of course, to rebuild Hadrian's Wall, hoping the "wind will blow high, laddie" so...
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Funny story: Rafael Correa caught fracking - no, wait, hacking! - into Nicola Sturgeon's ovulation-tracker phone app

Rafael Correa caught fracking - no, wait, hacking! - into Nicola Sturgeon's ovulation-tracker phone app

New York - The President of Ecuador picked up the scent of the ScotsGnats Leader's ripening sunny-side uppers during a UN hog roast in honor of FIFA. And now he's got Scottish eggnog all over his face. Sturgeon, on a four day fat-finding missio...
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Funny story: The Election: Part One

The Election: Part One

The election is coming! Please don't misread the second word and call the police on us. This is our first in a number of interviews with leading political figures in the run up to the already predetermined election in May. We spoke to king weirdo himself. Ed Miliband. We met Ed in a windowless room as the idea of seeing clouds seemed to distress him to the point where he would rock back and for...
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Funny story: Miliband and Sturgeon plan partnership ahead of election

Miliband and Sturgeon plan partnership ahead of election

A report by the leading market research and opinion polling company UTWAT claimed today that the success of UKIP can be attributed almost entirely to their decision to use an acronym for a name. Chief researcher, Norbert Spangler insisted that the...
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Funny story: Nicola Sturgeon sells 'Great Seal of Scotland'

Nicola Sturgeon sells 'Great Seal of Scotland'

With the General Election only weeks away, it is rumoured that the Scottish First Minister, Nicola Sturgeon, has sold the Great Seal of Scotland in order to boost the SNP election war-chest. Strictly speaking, the Great Seal of Scotland was abolis...
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Funny story: Dickheads - The new election debate show based on quiz show Eggheads

Dickheads - The new election debate show based on quiz show Eggheads

The BBC has announced that the election debate on Thursday will borrow the format of the popular quiz show; "Eggheads". "Dickheads" (BBC1, Thursday, 8.00pm) will feature several themed rounds. Round 1; "cliché repetition". Ed Miliband is odds-on favourite to win this with "world banking crisis" and "I hated Blair and Brown as much as you!" Round 2; impassioned ideology. Natalie Bennett should w...
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Trump Reveals That Putin Said He Didn't Fix Presidential Election, Cross His Heart and Hope to Die

"I'm sure he's serious because Mr. Putin also said, "Stick a needle in my eye," said Trump.
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