New York -- After more than five years of intense investigations and calculations, a panel of 27 accountants has discovered the direct cause of the ongoing collapse of the world's economy.
Its finding: A bookkeeper for a tax accounting firm head...
Critics of the ban on super-sized soda drinks have panned Mayor Bloomburg for taxing the poor people of New York who drink the most soda drinks.
It is predominently those people on a low income who consume the most fizzy beverages. Poor people pu...
New York - "You wake up in the middle of the night with a hunch the royal four poster's crawling with parasites," is how the Mayor of New York described his stay at Birkhall, Scotland
"Still, kinda reassuring to know the real bloodsuckers are fa...
New York - With less than a year left on his tainted third term, Mayor Michael Bloomberg is personally selecting a successor -- auditioning puppet candidates for the mayoral elections that will be held this fall.
The lineup of possibilities is fai...
Hollywood - Faced with the lowest approval rating in the history of approval ratings, the United States Congress plans to promote itself with a television ad produced specifically to run during the Super Bowl.
"Everybody keeps making fun of us," c...
New York - Mayor Michael Bloomberg was released from Bellevue Hospital today after being treated for what's being called "a firearm mishap." It appears that the mayor mistook a pistol for a penis and discharged the gun into his cranium.
Who will...
Brooklyn--Less than five days after New York City's Board of Health voted 8-0 in favor of Mayor Bloomberg's ban on sugary drinks larger than 16oz., "soda-pop speakeasies'' began sprouting up all over the five boroughs.
"It started as a joke...
New York, NY: New York City (NYC) Mayor Michael Bloomberg intends to restrict sugary soft drink sales to less than 16 ounce servings at city restaurants, movie theaters and stadiums.
NYC street vendors met with the mayor over concerns that the pro...
Dozens of New York City hospitals are instructing mothers of newborns about the myriad benefits of breast milk and to urge them to breast-feed their infants instead of resorting to substandard formulas. "Not only is it healthier than commercial alte...
It's Spider-Man week in NYC. To celebrate, the world-famous Carnegie Deli has announced a special sandwich. It's called "The Spidey." At Grand Central Station yesterday the man himself talked about the sandwich and said he couldn't wait to dig his...
According to NYC Mayor Mike Bloomberg, that is.
He was reading an article, "Asteroid weighed from millions of miles away," on Softpedia.com, when he began jumping up and down for joy. Not satisfied with his plan to limit the size of sugary drinks...
New York City Mayor, NeverBloomed, who in all honestly from the looks of him has never had a piece of trans fat pass his lips, more or less a really Super Duper Big Gullapi, has now put into law that no one shall have a really supery sugary wonderful...
In his never-ending assault on obesity, NYC Mayor Michael Bloomberg has ruled that as of July 1, 2012, restaurants in the five boroughs will now serve all foods on plates no larger than five inches in diameter.
The Mayor, in yesterday's news confe...
After easily pushing through his ban on sugar sodas as part of his War on Obesity, New York City Mayor Michael Bloomberg is now considering closing down the popular restaurant district of Little Italy.
Bloomberg claims the historic area's regula...
New York's diminutive mayor has launched a campaign to shrink the city's citizenry down to size - one resident at a time. The effort began today with a ban on super-sized sugared drinks and will progress with the construction of "fat farms" in ea...
New York City - The collective IQ of Wall Street executives has dropped below the mental retardation level for the first time ever, prompting the Federal Reserve to impose the "too dumb to fall" provisions of the Barney Frank Act.
Implementing a s...
Here are six unidentified quotes uttered by either New York Mayor Michael Bloomberg or German dictator Adolf Hitler. Test your knowledge of the world's fastest growing political scheme by correctly identifying who said what.
1."'I have my own army... which is the seventh largest army in the world."
Answer: No, this wasn't a boast by Hitler about his SS storm troopers. It's Mayor Mike warning t...
Police in New York have announced a plan to block the city's New Year's Eve celebration, contending that its crowd control responsibilities in Times Square interfere with a more essential duty.
"The public forgets that New York is one of the world...