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Funny satire stories about lethal injection

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Big Pharma Wants Slower More Expensive Drugs For Lethal Injection

Funny story: Big Pharma Wants Slower More Expensive Drugs For Lethal Injection

Pharmaceutical titan Pfoozer announced on Friday that they were imposing sweeping controls limiting the use of their drugs for the purpose of execution by lethal injection. They join a growing list of big pharma companies coming out strongly in oppos...

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Ripping Out Heart Better Than Lethal Injection

Funny story: Ripping Out Heart Better Than Lethal Injection

Dr. Joseph Mangele of Yale University, authority of Aztec culture and society, has written a book justifying capital punishment. He argues that when the state murders, in both societies, the ulterior motive is to maintain order and to sustain the pow...

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Ohio to Try New Method of Execution: Strangulation

Funny story: Ohio to Try New Method of Execution: Strangulation

LUCASVILLE, OH-After trying a new drug combo to execute convicted killer Dennis McGuire, who choked and snorted in paroxysms of pain for twenty-five minutes before finally dying, the state of Ohio has announced a new method of killing people on death...

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Republicans Introduce Bill to Make Slow Websites a Treasonable Offense

Funny story: Republicans Introduce Bill to Make Slow Websites a Treasonable Offense

Washington, DC-Mitch McConnell (R, AL) introduced legislation today to make the creation of slow websites created by the executive branch a treasonable and therefore impeachable offense and punishable for the first offense is waterboarding. For the s...

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Execution Drugs Withdrawn - too dangerous

Funny story: Execution Drugs Withdrawn - too dangerous

Two of the suppliers of the drugs used by the execution industry are withdrawing their use after it was discovered that they can cause death. "We never realised," said Bridget Tofar, lawyer for Smasho-Glyph-Kind. "We've been making Sodium Pentatho...

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