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Funny satire stories about lethal injection

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Funny story: Ripping Out Heart Better Than Lethal Injection

Ripping Out Heart Better Than Lethal Injection

Dr. Joseph Mangele of Yale University, authority of Aztec culture and society, has written a book justifying capital punishment. He argues that when the state murders, in both societies, the ulterior motive is to maintain order and to sustain the pow...
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Funny story: Ohio to Try New Method of Execution: Strangulation

Ohio to Try New Method of Execution: Strangulation

LUCASVILLE, OH-After trying a new drug combo to execute convicted killer Dennis McGuire, who choked and snorted in paroxysms of pain for twenty-five minutes before finally dying, the state of Ohio has announced a new method of killing people on death...
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Funny story: Republicans Introduce Bill to Make Slow Websites a Treasonable Offense

Republicans Introduce Bill to Make Slow Websites a Treasonable Offense

Washington, DC-Mitch McConnell (R, AL) introduced legislation today to make the creation of slow websites created by the executive branch a treasonable and therefore impeachable offense and punishable for the first offense is waterboarding. For the s...
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Funny story: Execution Drugs Withdrawn - too dangerous

Execution Drugs Withdrawn - too dangerous

Two of the suppliers of the drugs used by the execution industry are withdrawing their use after it was discovered that they can cause death. "We never realised," said Bridget Tofar, lawyer for Smasho-Glyph-Kind. "We've been making Sodium Pentatho...
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