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Funny story: Ohio to Try New Method of Execution: Strangulation

Ohio to Try New Method of Execution: Strangulation

LUCASVILLE, OH-After trying a new drug combo to execute convicted killer Dennis McGuire, who choked and snorted in paroxysms of pain for twenty-five minutes before finally dying, the state of Ohio has announced a new method of killing people on death...
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Funny story: Hundreds suffering after new legislation on pork injections

Hundreds suffering after new legislation on pork injections

Butte, Montana. Hundreds of people have been taken ill in Montana this week with food poisoning, following the state's recent decision to change its laws regarding animal slaughter. Since last month, all abattoirs must by law kill animals by lethal i...
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Funny story: Republicans Introduce Bill to Make Slow Websites a Treasonable Offense

Republicans Introduce Bill to Make Slow Websites a Treasonable Offense

Washington, DC-Mitch McConnell (R, AL) introduced legislation today to make the creation of slow websites created by the executive branch a treasonable and therefore impeachable offense and punishable for the first offense is waterboarding. For the s...
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Funny story: Execution Drugs Withdrawn - too dangerous

Execution Drugs Withdrawn - too dangerous

Two of the suppliers of the drugs used by the execution industry are withdrawing their use after it was discovered that they can cause death. "We never realised," said Bridget Tofar, lawyer for Smasho-Glyph-Kind. "We've been making Sodium Pentatho...
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Breaking News...

Iron Man Booted Out of Avengers for Drunken Flying..Again!

Captain America and Hulk met the press to make the sad announcement that Iron Man was no longer a member of the Avengers due to his alcoholism. "He PROMISED it wouldn't happen again!" said the Hulk.

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