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Funny story: Extend Your Shitty, Meaningless Existence With the Nutrirocket Food Extractor!

Extend Your Shitty, Meaningless Existence With the Nutrirocket Food Extractor!

The Nutrirocket food extractor is the latest, most scientifically-proven way to extend one's painful, lost existence indefinitely. Thanks to the most innovative in 21st century euphemisms, we have magically turned a 40 dollar blender into a $120.00 (...
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Funny story: Easter Bunny's Got The Hump Over Michelle's White House Egg Roll

Easter Bunny's Got The Hump Over Michelle's White House Egg Roll

Washington DC - He's hopping mad at White House chefs for messing up the mayo in the staff canteen's breakfast snack served sunny side up on Michelle's orders. A slimline, eco-friendly organic slime has replaced the traditional 100-calorie-a-pop...
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Funny story: Vatican: New Communion Wafers To Contain 3 More Grams Of Whole Grain

Vatican: New Communion Wafers To Contain 3 More Grams Of Whole Grain

VATICAN CITY-Catholics around the world will enjoy more whole grain in their communion wafers come this fall. Today the Vatican announced that they've re-formulated their recipe for their Eucharistic hosts to include a whopping 3 more grams of whole...
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Funny story: Food Poisoning The Latest Weight Loss Craze in Hollywood

Food Poisoning The Latest Weight Loss Craze in Hollywood

HOLLYWOOD, CA - Some of the hottest celebrities in Tinseltown have been spotted with shopping carts full of expired foods from their local grocery stores in a strange effort to get on board the latest weight loss epidemic - food poisoning. Accord...
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Funny story: Fresh Guidelines on Breakfast Cereals

Fresh Guidelines on Breakfast Cereals

The Dietary Information Panel (DIP) has now revised its advice related to breakfast cereals. Rather than eating any number of large bowls of porridge and any number of smaller bowls of Sugary Puffs or Chocky Pops at any one sitting it now recomme...
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Funny story: Fowl Play suspected in good eggs from Cambridge Chicken Research Facility

Fowl Play suspected in good eggs from Cambridge Chicken Research Facility

Supporters of free range eggs got a boost this week when scientists at Cambridge discovered that chicken eggs, laid by chickens allowed to play and run and dance whilst listening to classical music and pod casts by Stephen Fry, produced eggs that wer...
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Funny story: Weight Watchers Study Controversy

Weight Watchers Study Controversy

Following a study by the UK Medical Research Council into effective ways to reduce weight, over 300 women feel let down. The MRC took 770 overweight women from Germany, Austria and the UK, sent half to their GP for help and the others were sent t...
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Funny story: How can 'garbageless' school lunches be eco-friendly? School Boards going on a Healthy Eating drive.

How can 'garbageless' school lunches be eco-friendly? School Boards going on a Healthy Eating drive.

Eco Clubs are being encouraged in schools around Ontario. Teachers and students are encouraged to be eco-friendly. I have no problem with teaching children to look after their environment but I questioned the sanity of students being asked to bring 'garbageless' lunches on Fridays. Why? Because this is NOT actually helping the environment. The garbage still exists but it is in a different...
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Funny story: Mrs Horner, mother of Little Jack Horner, is completely frustrated with education system

Mrs Horner, mother of Little Jack Horner, is completely frustrated with education system

Big Mary Horner, mother of Little Jack Horner, has critised the Devonshire educational establishment for putting obstacles in the way of her son's progression through school. Following many other councils, Devon has recently brought in a celebrity...
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Justin Bieber and North Korean Leader On Same Fantasy Basketball Site

Pop star Justin Bieber and North Korean despot Kim Jong Un are both on the same fantasy basketball website, battling it out in cyberspace over the comic collection Kim says Justin ripped him off on.

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