Funny satire stories about definition

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Funny story: New Definition Of Torture: Vaginaless Marriage

New Definition Of Torture: Vaginaless Marriage

Experts, after results that show that prisoners who receive poor or degrading treatment suffer just as much as captives who are tortured, announced this morning that they are looking for a new definition of torture this morning.
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Funny story: Metre -v- Foot

Metre -v- Foot

In the UK we used to have a measurement called The Foot. Definition - 12 inches.
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6,815 Americans die on Black Friday

Some 6,815 Americans died on Black Friday, which is the average daily number of deaths in the U.S. The difference: 6,754 of these deaths were blamed on crazy-ass shoppers trying to score a bargain.
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