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Funny story:  Jerry Springer Nearly Dies and Goes to Hell; Rumble Ensues

Jerry Springer Nearly Dies and Goes to Hell; Rumble Ensues

HELL---Longtime tabloid talk show host Jerry Springer was pronounced dead from a gorilla attack on Friday, soon after beginning his Final Thought segment at the end of the show, but was eventually revived by EMTs at the scene. Friday's show, which...
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Funny story:  Bloomberg packed a parachute on his Tel Aviv flight

Bloomberg packed a parachute on his Tel Aviv flight

New York - Former mayor Michael Bloomberg personally demonstrated the safety of flying commercial jets to Tel Aviv recently, with a well executed publicity stunt in which he down played the threat of terrorist rockets that have been raining down on t...
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Funny story:  Gold to be Won at the Common Wealth Games!

Gold to be Won at the Common Wealth Games!

The Common Wealth Games are under way and we are assured they will be played out on a level playing field. Out intrepid Athletics reporter Jock White has called from Glasgow to advise us that he has discovered the playing field is much higher one...
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Funny story:  Rockets rockets everywhere and not a time to think

Rockets rockets everywhere and not a time to think

Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu's attack on the Gaza Strip is located inside a just and merciful response to Hamas rockets, echoed by President Obama's, "No country on Earth would tolerate missiles raining down on its citizens from outside its bord...
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Funny story:  Voyager 1 probe only calls back Earth when it needs more money

Voyager 1 probe only calls back Earth when it needs more money

Tensions were evident in NASA yesterday when it was revealed that the space probe Voyager 1 had finally contacted back Earth, however it was later discovered that the satellite had called back simply to ask for more money to go out with friends whils...
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Funny story:  Solar Panel Firm Bids For DVD Recycling Company

Solar Panel Firm Bids For DVD Recycling Company

Unsold DVDs and CDs from charity shops, music marketing outlets and teenagers' bedrooms have been harvested recently in huge numbers by the recycling firm, Earbleeders. Now the subject of several healthy offers worldwide, probably due to the fac...
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Funny story:  New Royal Race Meetings To Feature Only Smack-Head Horses

New Royal Race Meetings To Feature Only Smack-Head Horses

Rally style jockey protection cages are among the proposals for "Horse Smack-Head" meetings to be staged in Afhghanistan. The unfortunate horses which are prone to accidental banned substance ingestion will race while on morphine initially, before b...
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Funny story:  Michael Moore, Hillary Clinton Both Check Into Wealth Rehab Facility

Michael Moore, Hillary Clinton Both Check Into Wealth Rehab Facility

Malibu, CA - Sometimes you have to hit rock bottom before you seek out professional help. Such is the case with two well-known people in recent weeks. Michael Moore and Hillary Clinton have both checked themselves into a Wealth Rehab clinic after...
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Funny story:  Obscure Zoroastrian cult has infiltrated the Pentagon

Obscure Zoroastrian cult has infiltrated the Pentagon

Washington DC - A fire-worshiping cult behind state religion in the Achaemenid, Parthian, Sasanian and Arachnid empires has seized control of the Pentagon, specifically aircon and life support in the highly classified Restricted Wing. A statement...
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Funny story:  World War I commemorations "will be over by Christmas"

World War I commemorations "will be over by Christmas"

Official commemorations for the centenary of the beginning of World War I are being held this weekend in Sarajevo, with a re-enactment of the assassination of Archduke Franz Ferdinand. Following that, large-scale memorial events will be held in B...
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Funny story:  Hubble Telescope Spots Lois Lerner's Emails Leaving Solar System in Secret Rocket

Hubble Telescope Spots Lois Lerner's Emails Leaving Solar System in Secret Rocket

Cape Canaveral, FL - NASA officials have announced the Hubble Telescope has spotted an object leaving our solar system at breakneck speed and believe the vessel is carrying Lois Lerner's missing IRS emails. The rocket was not launched by NASA...
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Funny story:  Modern Diets Lack Lard - New Survey Findings

Modern Diets Lack Lard - New Survey Findings

Once everywhere and now out of fashion, there are many good reasons to cook with lard. Does it feature in your kitchen? Nutritionists have done a startling u turn to recommend the incorporation of lard into all four meals per day according to the...
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Funny story:  Obama Allowing White House to Deteriorate; Gets Ticket for Blight

Obama Allowing White House to Deteriorate; Gets Ticket for Blight

Washington, DC Republican Speaker of the House John Boehner admitted calling the police on President Obama due to what he said was "terrible blight" conditions at the White House. "Obama has let the grass get knee-high, with a couple of junk cars...
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Funny story:  Area Man Can't Wait to Get This Goddamn Day Over With

Area Man Can't Wait to Get This Goddamn Day Over With

Abington, PA- Local resident, Steven Mayer, of Abington, Pennsylvania, awoke this morning with a renewed sense of anticipation and vigor. "I was able to turn off the alarm a minute before 6:00," reported the 32 year old Mayer, who works as a daytime...
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Funny story:  Long-Lost Child About to Knock on Your Door

Long-Lost Child About to Knock on Your Door

Your Home, USA - Sources have reported that the child you have abandoned years ago is on your front step right now and is gearing up to knock on your door. The child, who was conceived 13 years ago at a Red Roof Inn Motel out by the airport, has t...
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Funny story:  'Water Cops' to Catch Wasters in California on New Reality Show

'Water Cops' to Catch Wasters in California on New Reality Show

Santa Cruz, CA - "Bad Buoys, Bad Buoys, whatcha gonna do, whatcha gonna do when they come for you?" You might recognize the theme song for the newest reality show to debut from California amidst their worst drought in years and ongoing, severe water...
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Funny story:  One's Horses Achieve An All Time High

One's Horses Achieve An All Time High

Despite Estimate, one of HRH Queen Elizabeth's horses accidentally getting contaminated food in its nosh bag, this year has seen many high points for the Queen's horses, the Palace said this morning. "Some of the horses that her nags mix with though,...
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Funny story:  Sporting Goods Chain Refuses to Pay for Employees' Boner Pills

Sporting Goods Chain Refuses to Pay for Employees' Boner Pills

Self Righteous Sporting Goods Corporation recently announced that their employee health plan will no longer cover medication for erectile dis-function (ED) unless the employee is married, Christian, and seeking to procreate. The closely-held retail c...
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Showing page 1 (of 5,021 pages)
Breaking News...

Microwave Attachment Eliminates Need For Head Shaving

Hyram B. Dison's invention, which eliminates daily head shaving, is now on sale. "Microcaps" use a microwave to defoliate scalps with a rubber skull attachment similar to ones used in electric chairs.

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