Showing:

Funny satire stories about capital punishment

Try another search?

Big Pharma Wants Slower More Expensive Drugs For Lethal Injection

Funny story: Big Pharma Wants Slower More Expensive Drugs For Lethal Injection

Pharmaceutical titan Pfoozer announced on Friday that they were imposing sweeping controls limiting the use of their drugs for the purpose of execution by lethal injection. They join a growing list of big pharma companies coming out strongly in oppos...

Read full story View 'Big Pharma Wants Slower More Expensive Drugs For Lethal Injection'

Supreme Court Justice Advocates Stomping on Dead Puppies

Funny story: Supreme Court Justice Advocates Stomping on Dead Puppies

WASHINGTON -- In a 5-4 ruling the U.S. Supreme Court established new guidelines for States who execute criminals for capitol crimes. "In view of the reality that there are significant problems with the five methods currently used to execute peop...

Read full story View 'Supreme Court Justice Advocates Stomping on Dead Puppies'

Ripping Out Heart Better Than Lethal Injection

Funny story: Ripping Out Heart Better Than Lethal Injection

Dr. Joseph Mangele of Yale University, authority of Aztec culture and society, has written a book justifying capital punishment. He argues that when the state murders, in both societies, the ulterior motive is to maintain order and to sustain the pow...

Read full story View 'Ripping Out Heart Better Than Lethal Injection'

Traditional Values Still Alive as Texas Celebrates 500th Execution

Funny story: Traditional Values Still Alive as Texas Celebrates 500th Execution

Texas cemented its place at the top of the leader board for number of executions per state on Wednesday, and the general atmosphere is one of joviality as Texans revel in their dominance of the capital punishment stats. Bill Delacroix, an executio...

Read full story View 'Traditional Values Still Alive as Texas Celebrates 500th Execution'

Daily Mail Readers Campaign For Return Of Death Penalty

Funny story: Daily Mail Readers Campaign For Return Of Death Penalty

Following the brutal killing of two young police officers in Manchester, a not insignificant number of Daily Mail readers have signalled their intention to campaign for the reinstatement of capital punishment. Amongst comments left on the Mail's w...

Read full story View 'Daily Mail Readers Campaign For Return Of Death Penalty'

Romney Demands Death Penalty Reform

Funny story: Romney Demands Death Penalty Reform

WASHINGTON, DC - On Sunday, Republican presidential candidate Mitt Romney criticized the current punishment system and announced that he will revolutionize the death penalty by instituting a new system if elected. "Public executions are the answer...

Read full story View 'Romney Demands Death Penalty Reform'

A Turkey of a Holiday

Funny story: A Turkey of a Holiday

In a stunning development yesterday, President Barack Obama has declined to grant clemency to Tom Turkey. The White House press secretary read a written statement which said in part, "I know this decision is going to make me unpopular, but there sim...

Read full story View 'A Turkey of a Holiday'

With 46th execution of 2011, U.S. still lags miserably behind China and Iran

Funny story: With 46th execution of 2011, U.S. still lags miserably behind China and Iran

WASHINGTON, D.C.--With two executions this week, the U.S. has recorded a total of 46 government-sanctioned murders against citizens in 2011. Incidentally, the U.S. leads the Americas by the same number, as no other such country in the hemisphere a...

Read full story View 'With 46th execution of 2011, U.S. still lags miserably behind China and Iran'

Hollyoaks introduced as main execution method

Funny story: Hollyoaks introduced as main execution method

Authorities in Yemen have introduced "Hollyoaks watching" has their main method of execution - for killing all their bastards in prison. Government Minister, Al Haque Im Hammeem stated in the local press that "We thought that stoning criminals to...

Read full story View 'Hollyoaks introduced as main execution method'

China invents new method of capital punishment

Funny story: China invents new method of capital punishment

Beijing, China - Apart from the usual communistic practices, China has invented a new method of capital punishment. A pool is filled with saltwater and the condemned are placed in the pool. This is done on a day in which storms are expected.

Read full story View 'China invents new method of capital punishment'

Hanging Is Back - And In Public!

Funny story: Hanging Is Back - And In Public!

In a shock move to restore popularity, Government Ministers have announced the re-introduction of capital punishment. The Home Secretary has taken it upon himself, under the Prevention of Terrorism Act, to bring back the rope. "I mean, we can get...

Read full story View 'Hanging Is Back - And In Public!'

American Headmaster At London School Kills Student

Funny story: American Headmaster At London School Kills Student

Roger Evans, headmaster at the Westchester Boys Academy in London, has been arrested on charges of killing young student Bobby Simpson. Evans is accused of having the child shot to death by a group of older boys in a military sciences class. The He...

Read full story View 'American Headmaster At London School Kills Student'

Capital Punishment - Will It Return To Our Schools?

Funny story: Capital Punishment - Will It Return To Our Schools?

There are suggestions that Gordon Broon is considering the reintroduction of capital punishment in the nation's schools. The moral breakdown of society and the growing lack of discipline in our schools are partly to blame. Broon also needs to find so...

Read full story View 'Capital Punishment - Will It Return To Our Schools?'

More Humane Executions in Texas?

Funny story: More Humane Executions in Texas?

Hanging Tree, TX (USA Today) - Based on the issues presented to the Supreme Court recently regarding the humanity of lethal injections some Texas legislators are proposing more humane forms of execution. Stating a long time, yet unwritten, policy reg...

Read full story View 'More Humane Executions in Texas?'

'Life in New Jersey' to Replace Death Penalty

Funny story: 'Life in New Jersey' to Replace Death Penalty

TRENTON - New Jersey Governor Jon Corzine is outlawing the death penalty in the Garden State. "We are replacing capital punishment with 'Life in New Jersey' without the possibility of parole. Capital punishment is a piec...

Read full story View ''Life in New Jersey' to Replace Death Penalty'

Solar Electric Chairs

Funny story: Solar Electric Chairs

Nashville, TN (AP) - In an effort to "Go Green" Al Gore's home state of Tennessee has ordered new Solar Powered Electric Chairs from Bell+Howell. The creator of the Solar Bug Zapper is now venturing into the lucrative capital punishment...

Read full story View 'Solar Electric Chairs'

Saddam Death Sentence Deemed Morally Just under Medieval UK law.

Funny story: Saddam Death Sentence Deemed Morally Just under Medieval UK law.

In a bid to justify the execution of the former Iraqi leader Saddam Hussein, the British Government has had no choice but to turn to some of England's un-repealed medieval laws.

Read full story View 'Saddam Death Sentence Deemed Morally Just under Medieval UK law.'

Bob Dylan could be Executed

Funny story: Bob Dylan could be Executed

It has become apparent that Bob Dylan, the old singer, could be executed.

Read full story View 'Bob Dylan could be Executed'

Breaking news…

Man Cures Cancer While Sitting In ER Waiting Room

After arriving at the hospital for a health complication a gentleman had to wait to be seen. 8 years later he's still there, but found the cure for cancer in the meantime. That was 6 years ago...
Increase speedPlayback speedIncrease speed Help
Skip backwardsPausePlaySkip forward
Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Go to top
70 readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more