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Comcast Announces Merger With NSA

Funny story: Comcast Announces Merger With NSA

Comcast, the largest cable company and home Internet service provider in the U.S., with assets of over $4 Trillion, announced today that it is merging with the National Security Agency. Having just merged with Time Warner Cable in an equity swap...

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Duck Dynasty Star Phil Robertson Says He's Thinking About Moving To Russia

Funny story: Duck Dynasty Star Phil Robertson Says He's Thinking About Moving To Russia

WEST MONROE, Louisiana - The star of A&E's hit cable show Duck Dynasty said he had no idea his anti-gay remarks would stir up such a sh*t storm. Phil Robertson, the Robertson family patriarch remarked to American Spotlight Magazine "Hey lemmy...

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The Duck Dynasty Clan Is Angrier Than A Toothless Gator

Funny story: The Duck Dynasty Clan Is Angrier Than A Toothless Gator

WEST MONROE, Louisiana - The Robertson family, stars of Duck Dynasty, is fit to be tied and they have expressed to the news media that they do not take kindly to one of their own being treated as if he is some kind of Taliban terrorist. The family...

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Uncensored Cartoons Mistakenly Showed on Kid's Channel

Funny story: Uncensored Cartoons Mistakenly Showed on Kid's Channel

A glitch of some kind hit 'The Kid's Channel' early this morning and was not pulled or corrected for some time, due to so many employees trapped in the bad weather. "I didn't know what was going on but I'm very sleepy in the morning and the kids w...

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Sarah Palin to host TLC's 'Hunting from Hueys' in January

Funny story: Sarah Palin to host TLC's 'Hunting from Hueys' in January

ATLANTA, Georgia (ABSNN) - The Learning Channel, once home to NASA, now home to Honey Boo Boo, has signed former Alaska Governor Sarah Palin to a two-year, weekly outdoor, hunting themed show called "Hunting from Hueys." "We are exceptionally plea...

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Dyson anti-tangle cables revolutionise electronics

Funny story: Dyson anti-tangle cables revolutionise electronics

Dyson's latest simple, but desperately needed invention has created a tsunami among electronics manufacturers: anti-tangle cables. This solves at a stroke the problem plaguing all modern houses: cables that spontaneously tangle up with each other and...

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VH1 to Feature Bin Laden in a New Series; Behind the Mujahideen

Funny story: VH1 to Feature Bin Laden in a New Series; Behind the Mujahideen

Looking to pump up the ratings with another original programming series similar to "Behind the Music", cable music channel giant VH1 will expand its in-depth profile series beyond the music industry to feature great bands of another sort. The pilot...

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The Los Angeles Lakers Turn Their Backs On Their TV Fans

Funny story: The Los Angeles Lakers Turn Their Backs On Their TV Fans

LOS ANGELES - The owners of the Los Angeles Lakers have just signed a $3 billion deal with The Timeless-Wonder Cable Company to continue showing every Lakers game but on "Pay Per View." A spokesperson for the Lakers who begged to keep his name ano...

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Selfish A--holes at News Corp., Cablevision Reach Agreement

Funny story: Selfish A--holes at News Corp., Cablevision Reach Agreement

Mere moments before every paying Cablevision customer in Philadelphia, New York and New Jersey said "f--k you " and ordered Verizon Fios, Cablevision Systems Corp. and Fox Networks reached an agreement ending a two-week stalemate marked by both compa...

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Pentagon Blames Cablevision for Nuclear Weapons Guidance Glitch

Funny story: Pentagon Blames Cablevision for Nuclear Weapons Guidance Glitch

The Pentagon says that pay-TV retards Cablevision are responsible for the 'glitch' which disrupted communication between 50 nuclear missiles and a launch control center over the weekend, although the Air Force never lost the ability to blow up the en...

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God Smotes News Corp. For "Judas Iscariot-Level" Tactics.

Funny story: God Smotes News Corp. For "Judas Iscariot-Level" Tactics.

While the Alpha and Omega usually steers clear of involving Himself in corporate negotiations (as evidenced by Time-Warner's purchase of AOL in 2000), but News Corp's latest shenanigans with Cablevision customers has pushed Him into action. I Love Sn...

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Breaking news…

New Bill Would Give Guns Citizenship

Sen. Ted Cruz (TX-R) introduced a bill {BLAKA} that would give guns US citizenship, along with the right to vote and own weapons. Asked about how they felt about this bill a gun said "bang bang click"
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