NEVADA STATE PRISON (ABSNN) - O. J. Simpson refused all press requests (except ours, of course) to comment on tonight's Investigation Discovery documentary: "My Brother the Serial Killer," that claims Simpson hired a serial killer to break into his...
Castor oil, Fox News, MSNBC, and nekkid chicks on air!
When I was a young kid, I knew better than to tell my Dad that I had a belly-ache. I knew better because I knew what my Dad would do if I told him my gut hurt. He was an old school mountain farmer: he used plant extracts he called "Lightning Hot drops," or, if he was a bit hung over, he used the all-time, get-even-with-your-children, gut-...
After millions of dollars of investment the human race can relax and rest assure that "Black Holes" spinning in space are not targeting the planet earth because the Supersymmetry theory has now been kicked into orbit!
Scientists working at the LHC...
Love/Hate relationships
I have mixed feelings about my feathered "friends." On the one hand, I spend over a thousand dollars a year on feeding, housing, and bathing songbirds, hummers, owls, hawks, waders, and, yes, vultures too.
I love watching birds throughout the year. Not only has my knowledge grown to the point where I can identify them by breed, but truly, I know some of them, indi...
Evolution geeks are today enraptured by the latest plot twist in their mythology.
For years, fibbing 'professors' such as atheist fundamentalist and evolution crackpot Richard Dawkins have been spreading the tale that snakes originated from the se...
Washington, DC - The President held a surprise press conference this morning for a small group of reporters. There he was asked if he really knew where he was born.
"I can't actually remember where I was born", the President replied to the report...
I was standing in line at the grocery store when an elderly man with a smooth southern accent came up to me and said, "Miss? Do you use those softener sheets that you put in the dryer?" Thinking that he was loose in the grocery store and needed directions to the laundry products I said,
"Well, yes I do," preparing to point him in the right direction.
"I thought you might,' cause you've go...
This is using an indisputable mathematical logic and should be viewed from a strictly mathematical viewpoint..it goes like this:
What Makes 100%?
What does it mean to give MORE than 100%?
Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%? We have all been to those meetings where someone wants you to give over 100%.
How about achieving 103%?
What makes up 100% in...
Science buffs are getting angry with the amount of contradictory twaddle being peddled from bemused so-called scientists these days.
In the space of a few weeks we have been told that our moon was formed by the collision of two smaller moons mirac...
Evolution has been dealt another awkward blow as a species claimed to be some 200 million years old, has been found, and unevolved!
Protoanguilla palau, as the species has been named, has alledgedly survived for 200 million years because its envir...
Yes, it's almost true. I have decided to start my own broadband service. I'm going to call it "Pie in the sky broadband Ltd".
By using the same artistic licence as used by other providers I can claim to offer headline speeds of up to 100MB. As long as I put a couple of ** after anything I make up and stick a disclaimer at the bottom of the page in writing so small that it could be classed as a...
Tony Hayward sat down to tell some lies over breakfast, then ended up drenching his Denver omelette with thick, black syrup, said a source.
Studies show Hayward's company, Blackwater Petrol, has likely been shoveling bullshit the American public's...
The Chartered Institute for Intentional Duplicity has announced its new Can't Be Arsed award, the CBA.
The award is the successor to the not-so-successful "Success Through Bullshit" trophy, granted to HR Departments paying a minimum £750 bribe to...
Closer to the Point
The miner packed the golden lamp into his haversack, fed the mule, and left the mine. He was two tonnes short of his daily call for coal, but didn't care. He'd found a golden lamp, and even though it wasn't a magical, genie holding lamp that could grant his wishes, the missus might take a fancy to it, maybe even enough to get him a quick handjob.
He entered his run down...
If you think that you have had enough of swine flu madness and that after frequent promising-moon-but-leaving-you-with-a-worthless-mound (i.e. foretelling millions of deaths but supplying only few hundred corpses) bouts of worldwide pandemics, the w...
ROCKWOOD, PA-- PETA, and the rest of the "scientific" turd for brains asswipes who say that dairy farming is degrading to bovines and produces nothing but bull shit and methane gas that destroys the ozone can relax their tight asses, if that is at al...
Anywhere USA: Diogenes searched for an honest man with his lantern. This reporter, possessing a large strobe lamp, set out to shine the light on various people and say "enough political BULLSHIT, please turn off the machine."
President Obama: "The unemployment rate should not exceed 8%, especially when the stimulus package gets up to speed and creates jobs." Au contraire, Mr. President methinks...
It's been revealed today by some nutter from somewhere or other that drinking seven cups of coffee a day or more increases the risk of seeing ghosts.
Coffee related hallucinations are nothing new.
In 1971 Gary Glitter drank some coffee and thou...